Joke Collection Website - Joke collection - Urgent! ! ! I will sign up tomorrow. I haven't finished my homework. Somebody help me.
Urgent! ! ! I will sign up tomorrow. I haven't finished my homework. Somebody help me.
Foreigners take off their clothes without seeing you, and don't go to see your sister! Baoyu had already met a younger sister, so he thought it was the daughter of Lin Zhixiao's family and was busy bowing. "。 When he saw her, he sat down and described her carefully. She was different from others: two bends seemed to frown but not frown, and a pair of eyes seemed to be happy but unhappy. She was in a state of anxiety and was attacked by illness. Her tears are a little, and her breathing is slight. She is like this when she is resting. "Baoyu said with a smile," Although I have never met him, he looks familiar, but even if we are old friends, we don't need to meet again today. " Grandmother Jia said with a smile, "Better, better, if so, more harmonious." Baoyu sat down beside Daiyu, looked at it carefully again, and asked, "Did my sister learn?" Daiyu said, "I haven't studied, but I've only been studying for a year. I need to know a few words. "。 Baoyu added, "What's your title? "? "Daiyu called her a name. . Baoyu asked the inscription again. Daiyu said, "Don't talk. Baoyu said with a smile, "I gave my sister a wonderful word, and the word' product' is wonderful. Tanchun asked what it was. "。 Baoyu said, "<<'s a general examination of ancient and modern figures >> It says,' There is a stone name in the west, which can replace the ink of thrush.' If sister Lin frowned, it would be wonderful to use these two words! Tanchun smiled and said, "I'm afraid it's your invention again. "。"
3.
Everyone knows that immortals are good, but their fame is unforgettable.
Where will the past and present be? A pile of grass on the wasteland is missing.
Everyone knows that immortals are good, but gold and silver can't forget them;
In the end, I only hate getting together, but I close my eyes for a long time.
Everyone knows that immortals are good, but only wives can't forget them;
You said hello on your birthday, and you died with others.
Everyone knows that immortals are good, but only children and grandchildren can't forget them;
There have been many infatuated parents since ancient times. Who has seen filial piety for children and grandchildren?
4. The humble room was empty, and the bed was full; Dry grass withered poplar, used to be a ballroom. Spider silk is covered with carved beams, and green yarn is attached to the awning window. What do you say about thick fat and fragrant powder? Why are the temples frosted again? Yesterday, the loess dragon sent bones, and tonight, the red light lies at the bottom of the account. A box full of gold and a box full of silver, everyone is slandering beggars. I am lamenting that his life span is not long, and I will know that I am dead when I come back! If you train well, you will never be a strong beam in the future. Choose cream beam, who wants to live in Yanhua Lane! Because the gauze cap is too small, it locks the cangue bar; I felt cold in my coat yesterday, but now I feel purple python is long: noisy, you sing me on stage, but you think my hometown is my hometown. That's ridiculous. It ended up on wedding dresses for other girls.
5. Flowers fade and fly all over the sky. Who has pity when the fragrance dies?
The spring trees are floating, and the falling flowers and catkins touch the embroidered curtain.
My daughter in the boudoir is sad and sad.
Hoe the flowers out of the embroidered boudoir with your hands and endure stepping on the fallen flowers again and again?
Willow and elm are from wheatgrass, regardless of peach floating with Li Fei.
Peaches and plums can be delivered next year. Who do you know in the boudoir next year?
At the beginning of March, the fragrant nest was built, and Liang Jianyan was too ruthless.
Although you can peck flowers and hairs next year, it is not easy for people to go to the empty nest.
360 days a year, the wind and sword are threatening.
How long can bright and fresh research last? Once you go with the flow, it's hard to find out.
Flowers are easy to see but hard to find, and those who bury them are worried.
Leaning on the hoe alone, I shed tears in the dark, and the branches on it saw blood stains.
The cuckoo was silent at dusk, and the hoe returned to cover the door.
The blue light fell asleep on the wall, but the window was not warm.
The blame at the bottom is double depression, half pity and half trouble;
Flow spring suddenly to bother, and to silence.
Last night, I sent a sad song outside the court, knowing that it was a flower soul and a bird soul?
The soul of a flower and a bird is always hard to stay, and the bird is ashamed of itself without words.
May wings be born under threat and fly to the end of the sky with flowers.
After all, where is Xiangshan?
There is no trick, a cup of pure land protects the wind.
It's better to be clean than trapped in a ditch.
I will die and be buried, but when will I die?
The man who buried the flowers smiled today, but who did he bury?
Let's see the residual flowers of spring gradually falling, which is the time when beauty dies of old age.
No sad songs for me, I don't know what happened! -Lin Daiyu's funeral speech in A Dream of Red Mansions
6. Soon, I saw three nurses and five or six maids surrounded by three sisters. The first one is slightly plump, of medium build, with fresh plums on his cheeks and greasy goose fat on his nose. He is gentle and silent and amiable in appearance. The second one has a thin waist and shoulders, a slender figure, an oval face and fine eyes, looking forward to flying, seeing the essence of literary talent and forgetting the customs. The third is short stature, which is described as small. Its hairpin ring skirt coat, three people are decorated together. Daiyu got up to meet her. After thanking each other, everyone returned to their seats. The maids pour tea. It's about how Daiyu's mother got sick, how she asked the doctor to take medicine, and how she died and sent out mourning. Jia Mu was sad again because she said, "Only my children love you. Once you leave me today, you can't even see me. How can I not be sad when I see you today? " With that, she held Daiyu in her arms and sobbed again. Everyone was relieved to explain, and Fang stopped briefly.
You know, there are so many butlers in our family, which one is easy to entangle? They joke, joke, and complain about mulberry trees if they are a little wrong. Sitting on the mountain and watching the tigers fight, killing people with swords, attracting wind and blowing fire, standing on the dry shore and knocking down oil bottles are all martial arts. Besides, I am young, my first class is not overwhelming, and I have to pay attention to my grievances.
8. Good sister, good sister, don't say two or three dollars, even if it is two or three hundred dollars, I will rely on it. Just look at me, look at me until one day I turn into fly ash. Fly ash is still not good, and ash is still knowledgeable.
When I turn into smoke and the wind blows away, you can't control me, and I can't control you. I went there by myself, because of your love.
9. Bitch wife with a bad tongue, who told you to talk! How do you know that he is suffering in that world? Why is it useless? What good is it if you want him dead? Stop dreaming!
He's dead, and I'll only die with you. It's not like you've been persuading him to write and study, which scared him to death. I met him like a cat and a mouse, didn't I? You slut didn't instigate it! Now I'm forcing you to die, and you're satisfied. I'll spare that one!
10. One is Xian Fanpa in Yuen Long, and the other is Mei Yu's unreasonable behavior. If there is no strange fate, I will meet him again in this life; If you say there is a strange fate, how does your mind eventually become empty? One speaks in vain, and the other cares nothing; One is the moon in the water, and the other is the flower in the mirror. How many tears can you have in your eyes? How does autumn flow to the end of winter and spring flow to summer?
1 1. Daiyu entered the room and saw two people holding an old mother with silver hair to meet her. Daiyu knew it was his grandmother. When Fang wanted to see him, he was put into his arms by his grandmother and burst into tears. Everyone standing underground hid their faces and wept, while Daiyu kept crying. At that time, the people slowly advised them to live, and Daiyu met her grandmother. -This is Shi Taijun of Leng Zixing, Jia Zheng's mother. Now Grandmother Jia pointed to Daiyu and said, "This is your great aunt; This is your second aunt; This is your eldest brother's daughter-in-law, Sister Zhu. " Daiyu has seen them one by one. Grandmother Jia added, "Girls, please come in. You don't have to go to school, because you came from far away today. " They agreed and went to two.
12. Everyone saw that Daiyu was young, had good manners and manners, was timid, but had a natural romantic attitude, and knew that he had shortcomings. Because I asked, "What medicine do you often take? Why not treat it urgently? " "I'm born this way," Daiyu said. I have been taking medicine since I can eat and drink, and I haven't stopped today. I asked many doctors for prescriptions, but it didn't work. When I was three years old, I heard that a monk with a bad head came and asked me to become a monk, but my parents refused. He added: "I can't bear to part with him, but his illness will never get better." . If you want to get better, you must not see crying from now on; Except for parents, anyone who has relatives and friends with a foreign surname will not see anything, so that he can be stable in his life. "Crazy, say these casual words, and no one ignored him. Now I still take Ginseng Yang Rong Pills. " Grandmother Jia said, "By the way, I'm here to make pills. Just let them mix one more ingredient. "
13. "It's a pity that you listened to him."
It happened that Xueyan, Daiyu's little maid, came to give birth to a small stove for Daiyu. Daiyu said with a smile, "Who told you to send it?" Don't disturb him, it will kill me! "
Xueyan said, "Sister Zijuan was afraid that the girl would be cold, so she sent it."
Daiyu took it and held it in her arms. "It's a pity that you listened to him," she said with a smile. What I tell you on weekdays goes in one ear and out the other. How did you listen to him? It was faster than the imperial edict! "Jia Xu's double-breasted criticism: To understand the beauty of things, don't look blindly in the secular world.
……
Aunt Xue said, "You are always too weak to be cold. Why don't they miss you? "
Daiyu said with a smile, "I don't know my period. Fortunately, my period is coming. Wouldn't they be annoyed if they were in other people's homes? That's easy to say. People don't even have a hand stove, so they send one from home. Don't say that the maids are too careful, just think that I am used to such trivial things.
Jia Xu's double-string criticism: It's strange to have this solution, which shows that it takes orchid as its heart, jade as its bone, lotus as its tongue and ice as its god. This is a real world costume.
14. Just as I was about to go back to my room, I just walked to the corner of pear fragrance court, and only heard melodious flute and euphemistic songs on the wall. Lin Daiyu knew that twelve girls were practicing opera. But Lin Daiyu didn't like watching opera, so she didn't pay attention and just walked on. Occasionally, two words came to my ears, clearly without leaving a word. She sang, "The original colorful flowers are blooming everywhere." Then he stopped and listened attentively, listening to the song: "What day is its beautiful scenery?" Who would like it? " After listening to these two sentences, he nodded, sighed and thought, "There were good articles in the original play. It's a pity that the world only knows how to watch the play, and may not be able to appreciate the fun. " He thought about it, regretting that he shouldn't have dreamed and delayed listening to music. When he listened again, he only listened to the song: "I was so moved that I heard something like" You feel sorry for yourself in a secluded room ". I was so intoxicated that I couldn't stand it, so I squatted on a rock and chewed the taste of the sentence "as beautiful as flowers and jade, like water flowing for years" It suddenly occurred to me that in an ancient poem the day before yesterday, there was a sentence that said "Liuhua withered" and another sentence that said "Liuhua withered in spring". & lt; I suddenly thought of the phrase "flowers are about to drip red, and there are all kinds of worries", and we gathered together. If we think about it carefully, we will feel heartache and tears will come to our eyes.
15. Speaking of which, Daiyu drank two mouthfuls of gruel, but she was still lying in bed. She didn't want the sky to change before F fell, and it began to rain. Qiu Lin's pulse and rain are uncertain, and it is getting dark and gloomy, which makes her feel even worse. Knowing that Baochai couldn't come, she took a book at random under the lamp, but>, there was a grievance of>& lt< parting >> Daiyu couldn't help feeling something in her heart and expressing it in chapters and sentences. & lt Generation Separation >> A song, in the case of to be>, is called & gt. The word yue:
Autumn flowers are bleak, autumn grass is yellow, and Qiu Guang grows.
I already feel that the autumn window is boundless, so it is as bleak as the wind and rain!
Help autumn wind and autumn rain come quickly! Breaking the autumn window, Qiu Meng is green.
I can't bear to sleep in autumn, so I take my tears away from Xiang Qiu's screen.
Tears and candles shake and throw tears, pulling sadness away from love.
Whose autumn yard is windless? Where is the autumn window that doesn't rain?
Luo can't stand the autumn wind, and the lingering sound makes the autumn rain urgent.
Even at night, the pulse blows again, and the lamp seems to be accompanied by tears.
The cold smoke courtyard turns into a depression, and the bamboo drops when it is empty.
I don't know when the storm will stop, but I have taught my tears to wet the window screen.
16. Daiyu took off her coir, wearing only a half-worn HongLing short coat and a green sweat towel, revealing oily green silk pants below her knees and embroidered gold cotton socks and butterfly shoes. Daiyu asked, "It's afraid of rain above, but these shoes and socks below are not afraid of rain? It is also very clean. " Baoyu said with a smile, "I have a whole set. I just wore a pair of clogs and took them off the balcony. " Daiyu saw that this hemp fiber hat was not sold in the ordinary market, so it was exquisite and light. She said, "Is it made of straw?" I don't dress like that hedgehog. Baoyu said, "These three things belong to the King of Beijing. "。 He does the same at home when it rains. You like this, so I'll get you one. Everything else is just that this hat is interesting, but it is alive. When it snows in winter, I put on my hat and went down to the top of the mountain smoking bamboo tiles. It snows in winter Daiyu said with a smile, "I don't want him. "。 If I wear it, I will become a fisherman in the painting, wearing a costume. "At some point, I remembered that I didn't feel anything, and I was connected with what Baoyu said just now. I regret it. I blushed and fell on the table coughing.
17. Baoyu didn't notice. Seeing a poem on the case, he picked it up and read it, but he couldn't help cheering. Daiyu got up and grabbed it in her hand and burned it under the lamp. Baoyu smiled and said, "I know it by heart. It doesn't matter if I burn it." Daiyu said, "I'm much better. Thank you for visiting me several times a day. It's still raining. " I reached out and took out a gold watch the size of a walnut. I looked at it. The pointer points to the end of the month and the beginning of the year. I'm busy. I said, "I should have rested, but you bothered me for a long time." With that, Dai Li and I went out together, turned over and asked, "What do you want to eat? Tell me, I will go back to my hometown early tomorrow morning. Daiyu said with a smile, "Let me think about it at night and tell you tomorrow morning. You are listening to the rain getting tighter and tighter. Let's go Can anyone keep up? "Two old ladies promised," Someone is playing umbrellas and lanterns outside. Dai-yu said with a smile, "Light the lamp today?" ? Baoyu said, "It doesn't matter. This is Aminwa, and it's not afraid of rain. "。 Hearing this, Daiyu returned to the bookshelf, took down a glass hydrangea lamp, lit a small wax and handed it to Baoyu, saying, "This one is brighter than that one, and it was lit in the rain. "。 Baoyu said, "I have one, too. I'm afraid it will slip, so I didn't order it. "。 "You can't get used to wearing clogs. The lantern was ordered to be lit in front of them. This is aboveboard. It turned out that I was holding it in the rain. Why don't you take this in your own hands? If you send it again tomorrow, you will miss and be limited. How can you suddenly change this temper of' abandoning the book and chasing the end'! " Hearing this, Baoyu quickly took it over. In front of him, two women were carrying umbrellas and Ming-wa lamps, while two little maids were carrying umbrellas. Baoyu gave the lamp to a little girl to hold, and Baoyu held his shoulder and walked all the way.
18. Looking for sadness and hatred for no reason sometimes seems crazy. Even if you are born in a good skin, rough belly, down and out, stupid and afraid of reading articles. Your behavior is out of reach, so it doesn't matter if the world slanders you!
Being rich does not know happiness, but being poor is miserable. There is no hope for poor people to live in glory, whether at home or abroad. The world is incompetent, unparalleled in ancient and modern times. Send a message to Wanhe: Don't be so effective!
19. Who knows Qingwen and Bi Hen quarreled and were very angry. Suddenly, they saw Baochai coming. Qingwen was venting her anger on Baochai and complaining in the yard: "We have nothing to do and can't sleep in the middle of the night!" " Suddenly, someone called at the door, and Qingwen became even more angry. Without asking who it was, she said, "Everyone is asleep. Come back tomorrow! " Lin Daiyu knows how the girls feel. They are used to playing with each other. I'm afraid that the girl in the courtyard didn't recognize his voice and thought it was another girl, so she didn't open the door and said loudly, "It's me, don't you open it?" Qingwen didn't know it, so she lost her temper and said, "Who are you? You mustn't let anyone in! " Lin Daiyu didn't feel angry at the door when she heard this. She wanted to ask him loudly to arouse her anger. She thought, "Although menstruation's family is like her own, it is really the guest's side. Now that her parents are dead and helpless, she lives alone in the house. Now she is serious and naughty, and she feels bored. " Tears ran down her eyes as she thought about it. It is not going back, but standing. It's not. It turned out to be Baoyu and Baochai. Lin Daiyu became more and more angry and wanted to get up early. She suddenly remembered: "I want to sue him, it must be because Baoyu is angry." But if I don't sue you, you will be annoyed that I have come this far. If you don't invite me in today, we won't meet tomorrow! " The more I think about it, the sadder I feel, regardless of the cold moss and the cold flower diameter, standing alone in the corner under the shadow of flowers, sobbing sadly and plaintively It turns out that this Lin Daiyu is a peerless beauty with a rare beauty. I didn't expect this cry. The birds and crows on the nearby willow flowers heard it and flew away, unable to bear to listen any more. Really:
The flower soul is silent, and the bird dreams. Because there is a poem:
Every son is talented and beautiful, and he should be happy in the world. He holds a delicate fragrance alone and gives birth to an embroidered boudoir.
Before the whimper was over, the birds were scared all over the floor. Lin Daiyu was crying when she heard a creak and the gate opened. I don't know which one came out.
20. Daiyu was so proud when she heard Baoyu taunting Baochai that she wanted to strike up a conversation. I didn't want Indier to make any more comments because I was looking for fans, so I changed my mouth and smiled. "Sister Bao, what play did you listen to?" Judging from Lin Daiyu's affectation, Baochai must have listened to Baoyu's teasing just now and realized her wish. Suddenly, when she asked him this question, she smiled and said, "I think Li Kui jy scolded Song Jiang and later apologized." Baoyu said with a smile, "Sister knows the past and the present, and knows the color. Why don't you even know the name of the play? She just said such a string. This is called & gt. "Baochai said with a smile," So this is called & gt! You don't know' offer a humble apology' until you know everything. I don't know what a' humble apology' is! " Before a word was finished, Baoyu, Lin and Daiyu all turned sour and blushed. Although Feng didn't know much about these things, she knew what he meant when she saw the three of them. She also smiled and asked humanity, "Who eats ginger in such a hot summer?" They didn't understand what this meant, so they said, "I didn't eat ginger." Xifeng deliberately touched her cheek with her hand and said in surprise, "Since no one eats ginger, why is it so spicy?" Baoyu and Daiyu were even sadder when they heard this. Baochai wanted to speak again, but when she saw Baoyu ashamed and changed his appearance, she couldn't say anything more, so she had to stop with a smile. Others always don't understand what the four of them say, so they pay.
These are all wonderful fragments in A Dream of Red Mansions. I wonder if they can.
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