Ask and answer cold jokes

Ask and answer cold jokes:

1, children can't lose at the starting line,

Students can't lose on the admission line.

Leaders can't fail at the front,

Shareholders can't lose money on the K-line.

Rural women can't lose on needlework,

Urban women can't lose on the curve,

All men can't lose on the prostate;

Pedestrians in the street must not get lost in front of the zebra crossing.

2. No one who has the ability is available, and no one who has the ability is available;

Those who have the ability to toast are small cups, and those who have no ability to toast are large cups;

Others who have the ability to turn around, others who have no ability to turn around;

He told others to write if they can, and to write if they can't.

Those who have the ability to lie do not blink, and those who have no ability to lie do not blink;

Have the ability to accompany the leaders to do bad things, and those who have no ability can only do good things for the leaders.

The county magistrate inspected and wanted to have dinner with the villagers. The villagers said: You're welcome. Leaders use it first. I'm not busy. At this time of day, I have to feed the dog before I can eat. I'm used to it. ? The county magistrate is short of breath: Can you talk? Herdsmen are sad: I am used to talking to animals, but I am not good at talking to people. ?

As soon as the portrait of David was finished, the local nobles came to visit and the leaders expressed their views. The nose is too big. ?

So Michelangelo climbed to the head of the sculpture, pretended, and knocked on it with a chisel several times, but it was not there at all. Then he threw a handful of marble ash at the team leader.

The leader nodded after eating the ash:? Yes, it looks much better this time. ?

5、? Meeting? Portrait: After meeting, how can it be? At first, I did, but I couldn't. Small things have a big meeting, big things have a small meeting. Coordinate the meeting and retreat. Pre-work conference, post-forum Weekly office meeting, weekend briefing. Yesterday's mobilization meeting; Today's evaluation meeting. Tomorrow's representative meeting, the day after tomorrow's on-site meeting.

The director of education visited a middle school and saw a student with a chicken in his hand. The director asked him where he came from.

? Just stole it. ? The students answered.

The headmaster who accompanied the inspection responded quickly and immediately said proudly, you see, the students we educate never lie despite some bad habits! ?

Question and answer joke 2:

1，HP？ Cockroach door? antithetical couplet

Shanglian: First-class reputation, first-class service, three pushes and four letters, it dares to be called the top 500, and the purchase flashed in June and July, and it has not been changed in August and September. The service is very unreliable;

Downlink: Ten machines, nine wastes, eight screens and seven flashes are a big rascal. Five calls, four busy tones, repeated refusals to reasonable requests, and no problem was solved;

Horizontal criticism: several angry HP

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3. Once upon a time, there was a sheep who had to work 10 hours every day.

One day, the master told him that there was a reward for working more, and he did it.

Next, the owner cuts off one third of its wool every month. At the end of the year, he knitted a sweater for it and told it: no, this is your reward. Congratulations, continue to work hard next year!

The sheep was very angry and wrote its story into a fairy tale and named it:? Performance pay? .

Following the excavation of Cao Cao's tomb, Song Wu's diary was discovered in Shandong a few days ago.

Among them, the night Song Wu killed the tiger, he said the following words: I was really drunk today, and even the tiger dared to fight. I will never pee in the Woods after drinking! ?

There are only four words in the diary of the night when I refused my sister-in-law: so tangled?

Many people came to the millionaire's funeral, and one of them cried her eyes out.

? Relax! ? People who don't know the truth comfort him. Was it your father who died?

? No? The young man cried even harder. Why isn't he my father?

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