Good books are recommended for reading-the weakness of human nature

Dale Carnegie (1 888165438+1October 24th-195565438+1October1), a famous American master professor of interpersonal relations, is the father of modern adult education in the United States.

Dale Carnegie used a lot of stories about ordinary people's continuous efforts to achieve success, and through speeches and books, he aroused the fighting spirit of countless people who were lost in ignorance and inspired them to achieve brilliant success from small stories. The book "The Weakness of Human Nature" published by 1936 has always been regarded as one of the bibles of social skills by the western world. He founded Carnegie Training Course in 19 12 to teach people the skills and concepts of interpersonal communication and stress management.

2. Read America * * *

"The secret of diplomacy is only five words: I want to like you."

"It's just that we got the order wrong-we want others to like us first, but we haven't thought about how to make others like us." ? -Carnegie golden sentence

Of course, in order to get friendship and love, we must first realize that "it is more blessed to give than to receive", and then show this cognition with practical actions. We can't just keep gold deposits in our hearts. Gold must be used to show its value. As the Bible says, "You can recognize them by their fruits".

I often hear many people complain: "I am too shy to attract others' attention", "no one will be interested in me" and "others don't want to know me" and so on.

Yes, why do people like you? The world has no obligation to like you or me, or anyone else. Is there any special reason why others will choose you in particular (whether for work or social reasons)? They don't need to pay special attention to you unless we have the qualities they want.

Marian anderson once vividly described her early life-when her career failed, she was so depressed that she almost gave up her singing career. Later, relying on prayer and spiritual pursuit, she gradually recovered her courage and confidence and prepared to continue to fight for her career. One day she said to her mother happily, "I want to sing again. I want everyone to like me!" " I will continue to pursue perfection! "

Mother replied, "Well, it's a good ambition-but, you know, Jesus came into this world in a perfect image, but some people still don't like him." People must learn to be modest before they can achieve great things. Marianne was deeply moved after hearing this, so she decided to "strive" for perfection in her musical attainments, rather than "want" perfection. Humility precedes greatness ",which is the best message her mother gave her!

Homer Clovis, a famous writer, is my good friend and knows how to make friends. Anyone who meets him, whether he is a street sweeper, a millionaire, a woman, a child or a child, will get along with him within 15 minutes and have a good impression on him. Why? He is neither young nor handsome, nor a millionaire. What is his attractive charm? It's simple, because he is not affected at all, making others feel that he really likes and cares about them.

The child will climb on his knees, and the servant of a friend's house will prepare meals for him with great care. If someone announces that Homer Clovis will come tonight! Then no one can be absent from the party that day. In addition to the deep affection between friends, Homer Clovis's family also loves him very much. His wife, daughter and several grandchildren praised him.

How on earth did this writer win this happiness? It's simple-be sincere and love others. For him, he doesn't care who the other person is or what he does. As long as you are a person, it is of great significance to him and worthy of concern. Try to talk to each other every time. By asking questions, he can know where the other person is from, what he is doing, whether he has family and so on. He doesn't nag, but expresses his interest and concern to each other, thus establishing friendship.

In this way, even people who love to laugh at life will reveal their fragrance like flowers in the sun. As Ambassador joseph clark Gru said, "The secret of diplomacy lies in only five words: I want to like you."

The best way to get friendship is to pay attention to giving, not getting-but it should be earned by yourself, not being attracted or coaxed for a while. The so-called ability to win friendship is not talking back and forth, not talking to people, not being funny or telling funny jokes. It should refer to a state of mind, an attitude towards life or a desire to dedicate one's love, interest, attention and service spirit to others.

Step 3 read and appreciate

? The author thinks that in interpersonal communication, if you want to get the desired effect of making friends, you must get to know others in a down-to-earth way, such as what do others like to do? Do what? Family situation, etc ... Use topics that others are interested in to build the foundation of friendship with him. This is what the author said, I want to like your wisdom! In life, we should not think that we must wait for others to like us first, so that we can figure out how to please others. On the contrary, we should talk about some common topics with others face to face.

In this book, the author discusses that we should learn to appreciate and praise others sincerely in life. Carnegie said: "There is only one way to get others to do anything-give them what they want." In your daily life journey, don't forget to leave a little praise for the world. This little spark of friendship will ignite the flame of friendship.