What is the psychology of people who are stingy to themselves but generous to their relatives?

I am afraid it is not uncommon for people who are reluctant to eat and drink, but are willing to spend money for the people they love. Personally, I think such people often have a sense of family responsibility and dedication, but from this point of view, his approach deserves our admiration.

But from another perspective, this kind of person is also a kind of cheap psychology. He is reluctant to eat and drink, but he spends money on others. In fact, his practice may not win the respect of his relatives. On the contrary, his relatives often take him for granted. If one day he stops spending money on his relatives, they may turn against each other. What is this? This is his coquetry for his relatives. Therefore, a person who is reluctant to eat and drink, but spends money on relatives, should not be respected, because such a person often does not have good results, and his efforts often do not have good returns. Isn't this a sad ending?

We should remember one sentence, temper is spoiled. When you are endlessly kind to a person, it is like indulging your children too much. The other party often doesn't appreciate it, or certainly won't appreciate it. This kind of effort is often futile, and it is also a blow to the giver and unfair. Therefore, I don't admire such people.

Perhaps we often say that our society needs warmth, which is true, but it only needs warmth, not excessive warmth. Excessive warmth is a torment, right?

I once wrote an article-what is a person? I'll post it here for you to enjoy.

What is a person? In fact, it is an animal, or rather, an advanced animal, belonging to a primate. Humans seem to be omnipotent. With his wisdom, man became the master of the animal kingdom. In other words, human beings are the police of the animal kingdom. What is this? This is determined by human wisdom and ability.

Since everyone has such super skills, there is a bully. People can say no to all animals and kill all animals, because nothing can restrain people's behavior. The law of the jungle is an eternal peer card.

People are thoughtful, people can communicate with words and languages, people have behaviors, people can be bound by laws and morality, people are instinctive, people have a bottom line for survival, people are civilized, and people use clothes to cover up their ugliness.

People are very profound. In order to achieve his goal, he will use all kinds of tricks, which also makes people's communication full of fear. Even if you are a hundred times more careful, it is inevitable to be cheated. Therefore, the communication between people is very difficult and knowledgeable, which is also the basic course for people to enter the society.

People are cunning. In order to achieve their goals, people can do whatever it takes, including deception, temptation, fooling, flattery and so on. As long as they can achieve their goals, it is worthwhile to do anything out of line.

People are very bad. Behind people's wisdom, there is more cunning hidden. As long as it has nothing to do with yourself, no one is too lazy to go into this muddy water. Justice may depreciate at any time, but on the other hand, people like to watch jokes, like to watch other people's jokes, and like to find their own happiness and happiness in the pain of others. People are so strange.

Everyone is selfish, and everything else can only be a reference. This feature of people is not surprising, but also a common feature of animals. The difference is that people's selfishness is often not very ostentatious, but is veiled with hypocrisy to perfuse some people's eyes.

What is a person? People are such things.

In fact, there are many such people in real life, and it is estimated that people with such feelings basically belong to such people. Many people have this feeling. We don't live for ourselves, our children, our families, our parents or even our lovers, but we are generous to the people we love.

My lover is such a person. He usually scrimps and saves, works hard and earns a lot of money, but he is always reluctant to buy himself a decent dress. Instead, he is generous to the person he loves. My sister gave birth to a baby at home and gave a red envelope of 5000 yuan. Mom gave her a birthday red envelope of 1000 and bought a pair of decent sports shoes. Usually at home, eating fruit is the same. She never eats alone. Every time she eats fruit, she always peels it and puts it on a plate and serves it on the table. Let's eat together In fact, she always said don't do this, be nice to yourself. But after so many years, she has kept this habit. In fact, they also know that they can eat and wear well after they have money, but this long-term habit of thrift has left a deep impression on them. Even if they have money, they may still keep their old habits. In fact, such people make us feel that life is very happy. If you have such a person around you or at home, will you feel very happy? Such people are not stupid. She is really kind, good at dealing with people and other aspects, and good at thinking from the perspective of others. Sometimes she may feel wronged in her heart, but she would rather grieve herself and make others feel more comfortable. Such people are actually very broad-minded and generous. If you have such a person around you, you must cherish and love her!

What kind of person is a generous person who doesn't want to eat or drink? Do you have it with you?

There must be, and not alone.

A friend of mine, whose family conditions have always been average, is generous to his brothers, sisters and friends. If there is anything delicious, he always gives it to others first. What other people have, they also provide the greatest support, and they are not distressed at all.

In my family, my mother is such a person who never thinks of others, especially sisters. From the beginning of studying, she gave up studying and read to her two sisters, and she ran at least dozens of miles every week to deliver meals to her sisters and help them wash clothes. When the two sisters grow up and get married, she will try her best to give everything in the family to the two sisters. For example, when I changed two Jin of soybean oil, she only left half a Jin, and the rest was given to two sisters' homes, so I might not eat as much oil as I do in three days when I was a child.

Of course, the two sisters are also very, very kind to their mothers, and they don't forget to bring a copy to their mothers.

This is called feelings, real feelings.

Yes, my dad did, but what kind of life did his wife and children live under the care of his devoted relatives after his unexpected death? Hehe, even relatives are not worth making.

I am born after 80, and I come from the suburbs of Shanghai. At that time, my father came back from Shandong to sell apples and made a lot of money. He also sells fish and clothes. Although it was hard, he did make money at that time. Then, my father is a man who pays special attention to brotherhood and is especially filial to his family. So, the money he earned first built a house for my aunt. In the 1990s, few houses were built for my uncle to go to college, and later a house was built for my sister-in-law. As for our own home, the house hasn't been built yet, and it suddenly occurred to us that my father was dead. Then, hehe, my elder sister-in-law and my grandmother actually swallowed my father's compensation because they thought my mother would definitely remarry. I remember my mother crying her eyes out.

Later, my mother, my brother and the three of us lived alone. My mother can only grow some land. Do you think this is the end of life? Hehe, my father's relatives are too bad for us. My elder sister-in-law also wanted my father's homestead, so she provoked her grandmother to drive her away. My sister-in-law is married far away, but every time she goes back to her mother's house, they abuse and bully her for no reason. My mother worked hard to grow cucumbers and eggplants, and they would secretly pick them. Neighbors feel sorry for our family of three and often give us some fruits and vegetables. But what about those so-called closest relatives, those who have eaten my father's flesh and blood? Hehe, I wonder what my father, who knows from the bottom of the spring, will think of his selfless dedication to his loved ones.

However, God has not spared anyone. My grandmother was diagnosed with uterine fibroids and uterine cancer when she was 79 years old, and her children were unwilling to treat her. She died half a year ago. My elder sister-in-law got it, but she was thin after the operation, but she was still alive. But the eldest daughter got depressed, died every day, and her life was restless. My sister-in-law had a smooth sailing, and her son went to college, got married and gave birth to a child. But the year before last, she caught gambling and owed 1 more than ten thousand loan sharks. My sister-in-law is almost 60, and she is out collecting garbage in the village.

My uncle later became a physical education teacher, but he found a Shanghai woman. Her family is particularly fierce and looks down on relatives in the countryside. When she was ill, her mother didn't come back to see her several times.

Therefore, it is really stupid not to eat or drink so generously to your loved ones. Lovers must love themselves first, and then take care of others after living a good life, which is the right way.

To be exact, there seems to be no such person around me. I don't eat or drink, but I am generous to my relatives. In other words, there seems to be such a person, depending on what kind of relatives I face.

For myself, I will be generous to my son and daughter, except for others. I think that's what I usually do. I can't bear to eat or drink, but I will try my best to give my children what they want, as parents all over the world do, so I think the word relatives is too general. One should not be stingy with oneself, but generous with all relatives. This is impossible, but also depends on what kind of relatives they are.

Of course, your own flesh and blood will be very generous. If it were anyone else, I don't think many people would do this. Of course, I don't deny that there may be such a person, but that person is definitely not me. People living in today's society demand to be treated fairly. If you respect me one foot, I will respect you one foot, and so will my relatives. It is estimated that only parents will give it to themselves, and only relatives can be called relatives.

Of course, relatives, you may give him some money or buy him some gifts. He will do this difficult thing for you. If there are no such capable relatives at home, if there are really difficult things at home that can't be solved, it is estimated that there is no way to find someone to do things. Relatives still smell like relatives, but in today's society, it is difficult to move without money! May our relatives help each other.

People who are reluctant to eat, but generous to others, generally have the following characteristics:

First, caring people. These people, whether they meet beggars or old people in need, will be very generous. This is because they have love. They feel that others are not easy, they need their own help, and they can help themselves, so they will not hesitate to help.

The second kind is people who are grateful. These people, who keep in mind the help others have given them, will try their best to help others and thank them for their previous help when they can help others in the future. What about these people? They are all grateful people. They are mean to themselves, but generous to those who treat themselves well, just to repay the kindness of others.

The third kind is people who love their loved ones. Generally speaking, these people are just generous to their families, such as parents, wives and children. They are very stingy with themselves, unwilling to spend money on themselves, but try their best to meet their lover's requirements. What about these people? They all love their families very much, and their love often exceeds their care and care.

My aunt is such a person. My aunt's and uncle's pension is nearly 1, which is very high in our small N-line county. Their living expenses are one month in 200 yuan, and that is 200 yuan. Buy 10 Jin of eggs, a large bag of noodles, and buy some shrimp. Pancakes in the morning, scrambled eggs with shrimps at noon, and wild vegetables that they pull out in the fields when they are free for dinner. In winter, I planted a lot of Chinese cabbage at home and gave it to her. I seldom eat meat. But she always has five or six hundred dollars in her pocket. When the daughter was born, all the other aunts gave 200 yuan, but only she gave a lot. I want to give her more money. My aunt said that it costs 200 yuan for foreigners to buy something, but their family can't be so small. Every time I come to my home, I buy a lot of things for my mother, including soap and so on. I really like her. She loves me very much. I have five aunts. She was the only one who bought me clothes in 1999. I remember this. But last year she got leukemia. Go to the hospital to check your organs. Nothing is good. She eats badly. There is no nutrition at all. The doctors were frightened and said that they had never seen such a person. The hospital refused to accept it, and my mother asked Shipo for help. The witch said to give her 100 yuan of boiled water. My mother and my eldest nephew found enough water in one afternoon and gave her water to drink. I went to Laba to see her last year. Such a nice person can't even drink water. Thirty people left their jobs last year.

My mother-in-law is such a person!

When the baby was born, the original pajamas were cut a little by caesarean section. Without saying anything, my mother-in-law bought me a set of pajamas for hundreds of dollars! Her own pajamas are a set of roadside 39!

She is frugal with herself! But I am willing to spend money for my family!

For example, once, I casually said that I really wanted to eat mangoes! The mangoes here are still relatively expensive, twenty or thirty yuan each! It was originally said to my husband! As a result, my mother-in-law went to buy me some the next day!

My mother-in-law sometimes hurts her knees, so I'll buy her calcium supplements! I told her the real price when I first bought it. A large bottle of more than 200 can be eaten for three months! My mother-in-law is distressed and unwilling to eat! She should take one tablet every day. She takes one every two or three days!

Later, I bought her a small bottle for tens of dollars a month! In fact, the prices are almost the same! But I told her twenty dollars a bottle! She is willing to eat! !

My mother-in-law, for this family! Give up everything! I don't want to give up on myself, so I will be nice to her quietly! I am also willing to give up her! !

My father is such a person.

My father is a good man, or rather a "nice guy". When I was very young, relatives often couldn't stay at home, saying that it was unnecessary to spend that money to live outside when going out on business. Father always entertains them cheerfully, and he has to take care of the itinerary, eat and drink.

My father is very frugal and doesn't demand much for his own food and clothing. In his words, "I can't be hungry or frozen", but my father is extremely generous to his relatives.

Once a distant relative was seriously ill, and his father took the money he had saved for many years to help others, whether he could pay it back or not.

I didn't understand him for many years, and even complained that he was pedantic, until my father told me that when I was a child, my family was poor and I relied on my neighbors and relatives to help me, so I wanted to repay this feeling when I could.

A little kindness from others in those days, but he remembered it all his life and paid it back all his life. At that moment, he felt his father's image was much higher.

I can't bear to eat or drink, but I am generous to the people I love. What kind of person is it? Do you have it with you?

Yes, my wife is such a person.

She is a standard native farmer, simple and honest, warm and generous to others, with little education. She only works hard to be kind, manages the family diligently, works hard and has no spare time. One day, my wife was pulling weeds in a rice field. When I came home from work, my wife asked me to cook dinner, and my son just came back from playing. I said, "Son, you go and help my mother pull weeds." The wife said, "Son, you go and help my mother pull weeds." I am speechless. I don't think it's good. Let him form the habit of loving labor.

Besides my Lord, there is agricultural labor in his Lord. I think he works very hard. Sometimes I don't buy him much fruit, he doesn't have any children, or he keeps some for his children. I often buy more later, otherwise he can't eat any more. This is his personality. He can't eat by himself, just share happiness, but he carries the farm work by himself. He really loves his family and children.

The same is true for relatives and neighbors. Let people taste delicious food. Relatives are always generous. Few people came, but I went more, so he was very popular, and I was glad! He is such a person!