Looking for classic jokes

1. In ancient times, a rich man invited guests to a restaurant for dinner. After a while, one of the guests finished a plate full of walnuts. He had no choice but to ask for another plate. He couldn't help but ask: "Why do you only eat walnuts?"

The guest replied: "Eating more of them can moisturize the lungs."

The host frowned and said: "You I just care about nourishing my lungs, but don’t care about my heartache.”

2. I am a football fan, and my girlfriend also likes to join in the fun every day. I took her to watch the game that day, and the game was about to end, and she suddenly shouted excitedly. : "Look, look, number 3 is about to come on!"

3. I drank too much and shouted at the top of my voice: "Dou'er! The next generation of you and Brother Ku is going to be called What? ""This...name is Ku..." Tudou blushed and held the corner of Youku's clothes and refused to let go. Sohu put his chin in thought: "How about... call it Kudou?" Sina laughed so hard that he rolled on the floor: "Pocket! Sohu is making a big fuss!" Youku glanced at everyone, hugged Tudou and turned around to leave. "Brother Cool, where are you going?!" "Create the next generation." Look, he laughed and said, "That's three minutes of stoppage time."

4. He was cursed by a witch and lost himself. Trapped in He could not leave the castle. The witch told him that he could only continue to exist if a stranger gave him a new identity and reconnected with the world. He picked up the phone, dialed a random number, and said hopefully: "Hello." , guess who I am? "Dudududududu..."

5. Sun Quan gave Cao Cao a giant elephant. Cao Cao wanted to know its weight, but all the officials were helpless. Only Cao Cao's youngest son, Cao Chong, suggested that he put the elephant on the ship and carve it. When the water marks reached it, it was known that the elephant was heavy. Cao Cao was pleased and took the giant elephant to the boat, but the boat sank. >