Humorous and funny sentences that make fun of life

1. The road to success is always under construction!

2. With you, I forget about food and sleep. Without you, I don’t think about food and drink. With you, my heart has something to do. Without you, I worry about gains and losses.

3. Your complex facial features cannot hide your simple IQ.

4. I am just fat for fun, not as serious as you who are ugly!

5. Real foodies dare to face thick thighs.

6. My whole person changed when I met him, and even two bullets couldn’t penetrate my face.

7. Why sleep for a long time while alive? You will sleep forever after death.

8. If you go out to hang out, your wife will have to change sooner or later!

9. If you don’t eat enough, how can you have the energy to lose weight?

10. If there is an afterlife, I must become a neurotic, because after I leave, you will be brain-dead.

11. Those obstacles that you cannot overcome are all because of your short legs!

12. Please don’t call me evil, that’s to protect you secretly.

13. As expected, I still sleep soundly while lying on the school table.

14. Please read aloud: The plum blossoms are smelling the flowers, and the branches are full of sadness. Invite to hear that the rocks are broken, and the dampness reaches the spring green.

15. If you don’t buy me snacks, don’t bother me. Your baby’s time is precious.

16. Because I broke up with the bed in the morning, the bed is now very cold to me.

17. Sometimes I drink a little wine and turn over and over again under the cold moonlight, wondering why I want to go down to earth?

18. Don’t open your mouth. I’ll want to bite it because it looks too much like a sausage.

19. After receiving the express delivery, I will no longer rush to open it. I think I have learned to be reserved.

20. You are like a true love in the palm of my hand. When I put my palms together, it would be strange if I didn’t suffocate you to death...

21. I have to fight with the bed every day, usually it’s me Lost.

22. Every time you finish an argument with someone, you only know how to scold them when you are lying on the bed.

23. I seem to be allergic to paper and feel uncomfortable every time I do homework.

24. What’s wrong with him ignoring you? Don’t worry, there’s still me, and I’m too lazy to care about you.

25. Since I went on vacation, washing my face every day has nothing to do with me anymore.

26. My computer is slow in everything but crashes very quickly.

27. Mr. Zuozuo, Gong Ling has been destroyed, and her thoughts have been broken. Today you and I have decided to break up our friendship.

28. Don’t say you are single, dogs are already dead by your age.

29. Watching sleeping pills of different flavors walking around on the podium every day.

30. I am often at the beach, but I don’t like the sea, but the waves.

31. Go to bed hungry and count sheep. One, two, three, four, five, six...

32. Time has smoothed my edges. He's obviously fat but he still doesn't admit it!

33. Touch your breasts, well, I am still a baby.

34. The so-called growth means that when you hear the word "turbulent waves", you can no longer think of the sea.

35. In fact, I was not fat when I was a child. Really, my life was ruined by saying no leftovers.

36. As a person, you must hold your head high and your chest high, so that others will not see your double chin.

37. Single men are called single dogs, and single women are called dog ignorers.

38. You are like a moving magnet, repelling me at every turn but never forgetting to attract me.

39. I have mastered the method of growing private money, and the only thing left is money.

40. I once thought it was a flower on the cliff, but later I realized that it was just a scum in the sea of ??people!

41. I never doubted that you were a beauty, I just doubted my aesthetic sense.

42. Be strong. Failure is also a part of success. Wherever you fall, you will blackmail others.

43. When it comes to sleeping, I can sleep soundly lying on the school desk.

44. In a class and a harem, there are always a few people vying for favor.

45. I think my math scores are worthy of my math teacher’s appearance!

46. Brother, don’t force me to use my power in Beijing. I don’t want to cause a bloody storm.

47. Just look at me coldly and cutely, and don’t hit me just because you can’t get me.

48. In the past, people could recognize it if they were turned into ashes, but now they can’t recognize it if they put on makeup.

49. Don’t hold me up. I’m not drunk. The road ahead will move. Help me hold on to that road.

50. If a woman chases a man with a gauze, they are separated by the Sahara Desert.

51. Since I started talking, I have learned to talk back, and my wife has also learned to sharpen her knife.

52. I got up early to go to class today. As soon as I entered the classroom, the teacher smiled and said to me that I was a rare guest. I was stupid at that time.

53. It is best for you to show your affection at noon. Do you know why? Because sooner or later there will be retribution.

54. The review boat capsizes at every turn, and the desire to sleep comes at every turn.

55. Ask me for a Children’s Day gift, and I can give it to you, but you should be careful about Father’s Day in a few days.

56. The way I express my feelings is always simple and rude, and we sleep together when we have time.

57. Girls who love to laugh usually have bad luck and poor grades.

58. A boy who warms only one girl is called a warm man, and a boy who warms all girls is called a boiler.

59. If you want to drink me down, you can pour me a cup if you are good-looking, or if you risk your life if you are ugly, I will let you see what it means to not get drunk after a thousand cups.

60. Holding the hot charging mobile phone, and putting life and death aside, this is a rare heroic moment in my life.

61. Asking you how much sorrow you can have is just like a pair of long johns that everyone has.

62. I can also touch type, but others do not look at the keyboard when typing, but I do not look at the screen.

63. I have many superpowers, not just being super cute.

64. Everyone who shakes his legs has a sewing machine in his heart.

65. You can disagree with me, but I can beat you.

66. The night will not be kind to those who sleep late, it will give you dark circles.

67. If you suffer a loss, do not drink water, otherwise you will become dirty.

68. What is the greatest shame in life? You cheated and failed!

69. I saw a handsome guy in the distance. When I got closer, I saw that it was a mirror.

70. The descendants of Korea are used to flirt with girls, and the Chinese Hou Yi is used to shoot the sun.

71. Marriage notice: The requirements are as follows, A is alive and B is female.

72. It is better to chat on QQ for half a year than to read Chinese language for a year.

73. When mice show their power, everyone becomes a sick cat.

74. I want to fall in love early, but it’s too late...

75. Love is like a ghost, many people believe it, but few people see it.

76. The difference between humans and pigs is that pigs are always pigs, while humans are sometimes not humans!

77. If you don’t take a bath in spring, mosquitoes will bite you everywhere. There are also ghosts that scream and scare you so much that you want to run away.

78. Hitting is kissing, scolding is loving, and if you love deeply, you will kick.

79. The person you are pursuing already has a partner, don’t be discouraged, there will always be a day when you meet.

80. You have the nerve to lie, but I have the nerve not to believe you.

81. Salary is like an aunt, it comes once a month and is gone in a week.

82. When I passed by someone, my clothes were torn and there were no sparks.

83. Being at home is a very unstable state. As long as there is a power outage, he will degenerate into a caveman.

84. Don’t come to me if you have nothing to do, and don’t come to me if you have something to do!

85. I smoke because it hurts my lungs, not sad.

86. The one riding the white horse may not be a prince, but may be Tang Monk; the one with wings may not be an angel, but may also be a birdman!

87. Wukong, don’t be so cruel, leave it to your master and let him hit her to death on horseback.

88. My schizophrenia has been cured and now I and I are fine.

89. Life is so vast and there are so many homeworks.

90. I think I should lose weight. The last time I donated blood, a hundred milliliters of lard actually leaked out.

91. You are gold and I am coal. You will shine and I will generate heat. Don't make me angry, or I'll melt you.

92. Life is so damn fun, because life keeps fucking playing with me.

93. It’s not that I look down on you, it’s that I don’t care about you at all.

94. If two people are together for a long time, it is also romantic to stare at each other.

95. Cucumbers are about shooting, life is about having fun.

96. I always feel that if the bed is laid out too neatly, it will make you spend your old age peacefully. Well, it's still messy and more energetic.

97. I am not a fortune teller in the square, and I can’t talk as much as you like to hear.

98. If my friends can sell them for five yuan each, I can make a small fortune.

99. If you are desperate, why not just take a car.

100. If you are still young after visiting brothels, please use Huiren Shenbao.