? Guide to choosing a spouse for highly educated women

Nowadays, many highly educated women think that it is difficult for them to find a partner, and the fear of marrying a female doctor has become a joke. There are also some jokes in the society, such as "Zhao Min is a junior college student, Huang Rong is an undergraduate student, Li Mochou is a master student, and doctoral students are extinct teachers", "There are three kinds of people in the world: male, female and female doctors" and "worrying about papers during the day and getting married at night".

Why are highly educated women always left behind? Why is it so difficult for highly educated women to choose a spouse?

I think the main reasons are as follows:

First: I am too busy with my studies to get married.

Look at the highly educated women around us. Nine-year compulsory education, three-year high school and four-year undergraduate course, and I was 2034 years old when I graduated; Further, I graduated with a master's degree of 267; When I graduate from my doctor's degree, I will be in my thirties directly. By the time the doctor graduated, women of the same age had already fallen in love and got married, becoming the mother of their children. As for myself, I put on a top hat for my master's degree and doctor's degree, and gained something academically. But I have little time and energy to fall in love because of my single-minded study. Inadvertently, the golden season of love has passed.

Of course, it is not entirely out of subjective choice for highly educated women to fall in love and get married late, and it is also a kind of helplessness in many cases. They are usually the best in their age group. Teachers, parents and society have paid more attention to it since childhood. They have higher IQ and lower EQ, and spend most of their time studying. Their life is relatively simple, and there are very few people they usually contact. In addition, they are not active enough to participate in activities and have a narrow range of friends. They can only worry about their love life. Coupled with the innate sense of superiority, it failed to keep up with the general rhythm of talking about marriage, thus missing the best age for marriage and love.

Suggestion: Relax and find a partner who has the energy to study.

Although you have missed love for decades because of your studies, it is not too late. If you really want love, you might as well use your study energy to find it. Love is also where there is a will, there is a way. The most important thing is to relax. Don't sell yourself at a discount just because you are over 25, and don't even bother to talk about love. How can you have a happy marriage without looking at yourself and others in a hurry? Live your own life and accompany yourself. Love is like this, it comes into being at the most relaxed and light moment, but it won't come to you when you want to catch it most.

Second, the traditional concept of marriage and family excludes highly educated women.

Traditionally, men are the backbone of a family, and it is natural that men are taller than women. Therefore, men usually don't marry so-called "strong women". If you want a man to marry a wife with higher education, higher income and higher social status than himself, it is simply a slap in the face and kill him. On the other hand, it is difficult for women to accept that men are inferior to themselves in academic qualifications, income and social status. Even if he can accept it, he will often be resisted by society and family. As a result, "my favorite famous flower was taken away, and my eyesight was poor." The "three high" women with high education, high income and high age have therefore become the "big problem" in the marriage and love market.

Suggestion: You don't need to deliberately suppress yourself because of these traditional ideas.

Society is striding forward towards equality between men and women. As you can see, the power of women has already penetrated into all aspects of today's society, and even the anti-traditional model of "women are the masters outside, men are the masters inside" is no longer novel. Although there are traditional ideas, it is already a spent force. If someone denies that you are "too good", so be it. Most of these men are insecure, controlling, conservative and do not appreciate women. What fun can I have with them? You don't want to find a man, you want to find a suitable man. Naturally, live high, men who really appreciate you will naturally be attracted to you. In modern society, there are many such men.

Third: the gap between men and women in the cognition of mate selection criteria.

There is a big cognitive gap between men and women in choosing a spouse. Men tend to find women who are younger than themselves and have lower education than themselves, rather than women who are stronger than themselves and better than themselves. A man who wants to marry a wife doesn't care how high her education, income and ability are. I care more about this woman's appearance, personality and temper. Then there is education and work. On jiayuan's website, members with photos are almost 20 times more likely to be viewed than those without photos. Some of the most beautiful women can receive thousands of letters here a month, while excellent women with higher education receive far fewer letters.

When a highly educated woman chooses a partner, the first consideration is often the other person's "what education, how about work, and income geometry." Often highly educated women are completely independent economically and spiritually, because their pursuit of spiritual and emotional life is relatively idealistic, and they have high requirements for mate selection and are unwilling to compromise easily. Many of them find it difficult to accept men with lower education and income than themselves. Although many of them regard "sociability" as an important condition in mate selection criteria, their educational background is often regarded as the basis of communication, and the economic strength of the other party is also an unavoidable problem. These people all think that finding a man should at least not earn less than themselves, but they often earn too much, so it is very troublesome to find it.

Therefore, "the person I love doesn't love me, and the person who loves me doesn't love me."

Suggestion: Don't ask men to be better than you in everything.

If you are a modern woman who accepts the concept of equality between men and women, you should not still hold the conservative concept that "men must be better than women". The pattern of the relationship between men and women in China has changed. The growth process, employment environment, ability and quality of men and women are more and more similar. In the present social environment, both men and women have their own pressures and anxieties. Why do you insist that men are better than you? Let go of the poverty mentality of "relying on men". As a highly educated and knowledgeable woman, you are rich and don't need a man's help. Equality and mutual assistance are more conducive to the growth of beautiful love and marriage.

Fourth: the cultivation of highly educated women.

No matter how the times change, how the criteria for women to choose a spouse change, men's eyes remain unchanged for thousands of years. They always like young and energetic girls. Nowadays, cheerful and lively girls seem to be more popular with boys, which seems to be not the strength of most highly educated women. In general, they always choose reserved waiting and habitual low-key so that they miss many good relationships.

Suggestion: Men also like to be confessed.

If you have the right person, especially online, if you don't express your love to him, he won't even know you exist. Even if the other person likes you, how can he summon up the courage to talk to you when he sees your expression that seems uninterested in him? You know, everyone needs to be encouraged. Aren't men afraid of your confession and losing face? Your reserve and affectation will really attract some men, but most of them are men, who are either self-abased, clumsy and slow. Even if they see that you are not interested, they don't know how to walk away, or they are extremely eager to conquer or afraid to give you a promise, so they don't care whether you are interested in him or not. As the saying goes, it is not worthwhile for a woman to chase a man's veil. Don't fall into anxious secret love or miss marriage for fear of losing unnecessary face.