The latest funny joke

There were so many people in the restaurant that a young couple couldn't find a seat, so they shared a table with me and sat opposite me.

To tell the truth, that woman was really beautiful, so I took one more look and the man found it. He slapped a Volkswagen key on the table to scare me. I looked at it carefully and went to Phaeton. ...

I dropped a Maserati car key on the table, bang, bang, Bugatti, Rolls-Royce, and I dropped some car keys on the table. The man left with the woman in frustration. ...

Really, you and I have another key to install!

fourth

Remittance to the bank, the car was temporarily parked on the side of the road. In order to be afraid of being punished by the traffic police, I left the car with my friend and told him that there was a car inspector to inform me.

A few minutes later, a traffic policeman came, and the friend rushed into the bank and shouted, Big Brother, the police are coming, let's go!

Nima, dozens of people in such a big hall were silent for an instant, then the crowd poured out of the bank like a flood, and then I was pinned to the ground by five or six security guards. ...

It's fucking unfair! Not afraid of opponents like gods, but afraid of teammates like pigs!

His uncle told a series of funny jokes.

It snows heavily today. I just went out to watch an uncle fall. I went over and asked, grandpa, my salary is less than two thousand a month. Can I help you up?

Grandpa: Go ahead, young man. I'll wait a little longer.

Me: OK!

Although the weather is cold, my uncle's words are warm and full of positive energy. ...

Walking on the road, I saw my uncle lying on the ground. I hurried forward to help him. My uncle looked at me and said, don't move after birth. You are also a part-time job. I'll wait until you leave.

I was very touched, so I quickly said, Grandpa, there is a parked car driving a Land Rover.

Grandpa is also excited: You are such a young man, so don't go and give me a witness. After that, buy a car and drive to work.

(3) Walking on the road, I saw an uncle lying on the ground. I hurried to lie down with him. Uncle looked at me and said, Don't take my life from now on. My son wants to buy a house and marry.

I said: I also want to buy a house and marry a wife, but I don't want to be old.

Grandpa said: There is ambition in the afterlife. You can own this land. I'll change it!

second

Chinese in primary schools is too difficult now. Look at one of their homework problems:

Requirements: Connect the following four sentences with related words:

(1) Sister Li is paralyzed;

(2) Sister Li studied tenaciously;

(3) Sister Li has learned many foreign languages;

(4) Sister Li learned acupuncture.

The correct answer should be: Sister Li is paralyzed, but she studies doggedly, not only learning many foreign languages, but also learning acupuncture. )

As a result, one child wrote: Although Sister Li stubbornly studied acupuncture and many foreign languages, she was still paralyzed.

Later, found more fierce children wrote:

Sister Li not only learned a foreign language, but also learned acupuncture. She studied so doggedly that she was finally paralyzed.

Sister Li was paralyzed, because she studied hard, and not only learned many foreign languages, but also learned acupuncture.

Sister Li studied very tenaciously, not only learned a lot of foreign languages and acupuncture, but also learned paralysis at last.

Sister Li has learned a lot of foreign languages, acupuncture and moxibustion, and is still stubbornly learning paralysis.

Wonderful is always at the end:

Sister Li learned a lot of foreign languages and acupuncture through tenacious study, and as a result, she paralyzed herself according to a foreign language version of acupuncture book!

first

I'm in trouble today.

There are several transparent shrimps in the fish tank in the office. The leader looked at them with glasses for a long time and asked me what I kept.

I said, "Shrimp!"

The leader was one leng and left. ...

I was also stunned and quickly explained loudly: "Shrimp boss! Draw shrimp! The leader is really shrimp! ! It's real shrimp! ! ! "

You can go to "Hahahaha 234" to find out, and many of them are the latest and funniest this year.