There are jokes, humor, and obscenity. The more, the better.

1. The teacher asked Xiaoming, "1+ 1=?" Xiao Ming said, "I don't know." Xiaoming went home to ask grandpa, who was watching TV and didn't hear what Xiaoming said. He said, "Asshole!" The TV is put in a place where it needs to be knocked. (Xiao Ming went to ask his sister again. My sister is taking a bath, but she didn't hear what Xiaoming said. She said, "How comfortable!" "Xiao Ming asked his brother again. My brother is fighting with someone, but he didn't hear what Xiaoming said. He said, "underworld boss!" "Xiao Ming went to ask his sister again. My sister is listening to music, but she didn't hear what Xiaoming said. She said, "bunny, open the door!" " "Xiao Ming remembers. The teacher asked Xiao Ming again: "1+ 1=?" Xiao Ming said, "Bastard!" The teacher patted Xiao Ming. Xiao Ming said, "How comfortable!" The teacher scolded, "Who told you to say that?" Xiao Ming said, "underworld boss!" "The teacher shut Xiaoming out, and Xiaoming said," Rabbit, open the door! " "

2. Falling sky, where are you romantic? Don't run around, don't discharge everywhere. I know you are an adult, and admiration is inevitable, but with your conditions, you can't be so casual. You are a purebred German shepherd, you can't fall in love with a stupid dog!

3. A psychopath is fishing in an empty bathtub. The doctor joked, "How many did you catch?" The man replied, "You're crazy, you can't see it's empty!" " "

I give you abalone, but you don't eat it. Give you shark's fin, you don't eat it. This is your pizza, and you still won't eat it. This is your hamburger. You'd better not eat. I really can't raise you, my dear little pig!

I saw you that day, in the supermarket! You quietly put your hand on the barcode scanner, and the screen shows: pig's trotters 8 yuan. Do you think the machine is broken? Looking from the face, the screen shows 5 yuan, pig head!

6. A professor went to the nude camp to give a speech. He also took off his clothes to show respect. I didn't expect everyone in the nude camp to wear clothes to show respect ~ ~ ~

7. There was a steamed stuffed bun, which felt very Russian when walking, so I ate it myself.

8. A person lingers in front of the donation box and looks blue: Do you want to donate this dime? Finally, he donated the money. A man next to him suddenly shouted, Oh, my God, this dime was donated by both of us! ! ! How stingy!

If you want more, let me know and I'll give you more.