How do humans mate?

"Self" is actually more important than what they say about promotion.

Without self, all promotions are a joke, castles in the air, no true self and no belief in one's own value.

Your promotion has become a means to attract other people's chips and link exchange. Being in such a relationship will not make you really feel safe, confident and loved.

Growth is a lifelong topic, and it's not too late to start now.

Your inferiority has nothing to do with your face.

My friend Cai Xiao has a super strong mother. She was a neglected daughter when she was a child. She is the kind of person who "especially lacks love and acceptance"

She is beautiful, seductive, naive and lovable. But she never really loved.

Although she is beautiful, subconsciously, she feels that she is not worthy of being loved. She gave herself a low score.

With any man, she feels that the other person will not really invest in herself. She is worried that the other party will leave, and she has always been very protective of herself. She has never been too involved in a relationship.

However, she looks like a proud princess in front of everyone except her best friend.

The state of her late marriage is almost that two partners live in the same house, start a company together and raise the next generation together. If it is not necessary, there will be no chat.

Talking about money and children, going abroad for a holiday in the New Year and sending a few friends show that you have a husband, children, money and beautiful women, and everything is fine.

Finally, she cheated on a middle-aged man, and the other party was also very general to her. "Actually, I don't think he loves me very much, but isn't that good?" She said so, but I feel that behind this complicated emotional relationship, she is extremely lonely.

I advised her that if the marriage really can't go on and start over, you deserve a more decent life. Why do you live like this?

But she knows a lot. The reality is that she has been "allowing" herself to live in a half-baked and half-dead status quo, which shows that subconsciously, this kind of life is what she thinks is her best match.

In the past two years, she began to spend a lot of money on her face, wearing bright makeup and popular red lips, but there was no real happiness in her smile.

If a person does not establish a sense of self-worth, then she does not really love herself, nor does she really believe that she is valuable and worthy of being loved.

Spending more money on your face, wearing more expensive clothes, and learning more words and communication methods is just a temporary solution, not a permanent cure, and spending money to buy comfort.

It seems that you have done a lot to improve yourself and make yourself better, but noisy behavior has blocked your way of self-improvement and building a strong core self. Please allow me to be more direct-this kind of plastic surgery, body shaping, and learning speech skills.

Sometimes, it's just your escape from your true self, full of inferiority and unloved.

If you don't even want to see yourself, but keep avoiding it, how can you talk about real self-acceptance and growth?

If there is no real self-acceptance and growth, your cheeks, your figure and your words will not bring you a true lover and a feeling that really nourishes you.

The true self that you ignore is still invisible and unloved.

Instead of changing your face,

Why don't you change your "cognitive model"

Changing your face, or learning some communication methods, will theoretically make people in contact with you feel your beautiful face and realize more harmonious communication.

But creating love or more links is something that can only be achieved at the spiritual level.

No matter how many people have said that men are visual animals, if you enter a serious relationship with love, trust, long-term commitment and dedication, it must be beyond vision and need spiritual response.

If you have a beautiful appearance and learn some communication skills, you can capture a quality man who loves you wholeheartedly. Please treat men as idiots. Don't men have hearts? Don't their ideal relationship need a mental shock?

The subconscious plays a huge role in gender relations or interpersonal relationships, far exceeding your appearance and conditions. The information sent by your subconscious will also be received by the other person's subconscious.

Cognitive schema is some basic frames for you to know the world. It is relatively fixed in your heart. For the sake of understanding.

We can regard it as our understanding of the world, our definition of ourselves and our attitude towards feelings in our subconscious personality.

If your cognitive schema, that is, your subconscious personality, you are very inferior, and you have been living in a feeling of rejection. You don't believe that you are really beautiful or that you are excellent. You dare not expose your true self to others, but please others with your false self.

Then even if you have a beautiful face, perfect figure and excellent communication skills, when you have deep and long-term contact with others, the subconscious of the other person will immediately recognize the information sent by your subconscious.

"I have no confidence in this relationship", "I don't think I deserve to be loved, such a good partner doesn't belong to me", "I'm afraid of losing and being abandoned, and I'm anxious".

Then, in a real relationship, your subconscious will prevail.

You may constantly ask the other party for strong proof of love because of inferiority and insecurity;