My monthly salary is 30,000 yuan, and my mother-in-law often asks me for living expenses to help my lazy brother-in-law. How could she refuse?

After marriage, some things can't be clarified because they involve family relations. If this is a problem between husband and wife, both of them can talk it over. But it involves in-laws and the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. This is an eternal question. It is difficult for anyone to give you a perfect solution, but my personal opinion is to learn to refuse bravely.

How much money you earn is your problem. Only you and your wife have the right to discuss, others don't. Your partner has no problem with your salary level. It doesn't matter how much you earn, so no one can influence it. So how much money you earn has nothing to do with your mother-in-law, let alone your brother-in-law. What I earn is my own ability and strong ability. Now there are many working women who have worked hard in the workplace for a long time and have their own unique experiences in a certain field. They are really excellent and get a lot of money, from 20 thousand to 30 thousand. But how much you earn is your own business, and it has nothing to do with others. Your mother-in-law has no right to ask you to help others because you earn more.

It should also be said that it has the most direct influence on your partner's attitude. Your other half is the man in the middle, that is, he is both your other half, your mother-in-law's son and your brother-in-law's brother. What kind of attitude he has directly determines how you should react. If your partner supports your behavior, he will give it to you if he thinks you are willing, and refuse it if he doesn't give it to you, then you won't have any embarrassing problems. But if your other half doesn't say anything and even thinks you have the financial ability, so should the brothers-in-law. You should consider this situation.

In marriage, if the husband and wife are United and understand each other, the opinions of others are not so important. Even the opinions of your parents-in-law are not that important. As long as your partner trusts you, he is willing to understand you and consider the problem from your point of view, then your marriage relationship will not be affected. Don't take it out on your other half for what your mother-in-law thinks and does. Look at each other's attitude. He supports you, then you should bravely refuse, because although you have money, you have no obligation to take care of his life. Occasionally, but there is no such continuous obligation. Helping is mutual affection, and not helping is a matter of course.

As for the problem of helping the younger generation, it has been difficult for the family to solve this problem. In fact, it is a bit similar to helping my younger brother or Ma Baonan. If your partner has a younger brother or sister, she has no skills. When she reaches a certain age, she should make money. If she doesn't make money, she just eats and dies every day, so she needs your other half to help him. Then your partner's parents still think it's your partner's natural obligation. what do you think? If your thoughts coincide with your current partner, then your relationship can last forever.

It is ok to help occasionally. If the brother-in-law needs financial assistance occasionally, he needs to buy a house and a car. As a relative, he can help as much as he can. You have strong financial ability and help more, but you don't have strong financial ability. Help less, you can be attentive and affectionate. But you have no obligation to help him continuously. You are not his parents. Only parents in this world have the obligation to support their children. /kloc-After 0/8 years old, parents have no such obligation. It's just that many parents in China are not at ease. You really don't have to force yourself to do something unhappy because of your brother-in-law.

Economic freedom can bring freedom of life. It is your ability to earn more money by yourself, but you have no obligation to help others. There is nothing wrong with the relationship between husband and wife. Next time you encounter such a thing, you can live your own life and refuse each other decisively. It doesn't matter whether your mother-in-law or your brother-in-law wants your brother-in-law, but there is no money or no money. Because you have helped him continuously, he will form a subconscious mind that you should help him. He naturally came to you after he had no money. Why would he? You are not his parents. You have no obligation. How much you earn has nothing to do with him. You must correct this incorrect view and not adapt to this bad atmosphere.

What problems between husband and wife need to be discussed with each other, that is to say, you should ask your other half what they think. If your partner trusts you and supports you, this problem will be easily solved. If your partner is unclear and even thinks it is normal for you to donate to each other, then you should think about whether this marriage should continue. Because although it is better not to ruin a marriage by tearing down the 10 temple, the other party is not on the same side with you now. What will your other half do when you have problems with your mother-in-law and father-in-law? Think clearly about this problem, because you know the big picture from a small aspect, and even know what people will do in the future. This will affect your happiness in life, so you should consider it carefully.