50 words of English jokes

Mother: Why are you jumping up and down?

Tom: I just took some medicine. I want to shake the bottle.

Mom: Why do you keep jumping up and down?

Tom: I just took the medicine, but I forgot to shake the bottle first.

Look: (I collected 10 English jokes with Chinese translation)

1. Give some advice to people who are about to retire. If you are only 65 years old, never go to a nursing home. Everyone else is in their 70s, 80s or 90s. So, when something needs to be moved, lifted or loaded, they will shout, "Take the child away."

Here I want to give some advice to those who are about to retire. If you are only 65 years old, don't join the retirement community. Because everyone there is seventy or eighty years old or eighty or ninety years old. Whenever they want to move, lift or load something, they shout, "Let the little one do it."

There are 9 words in every sentence. Q: What does a tip pepper do?

A: Get the jalapeno business!

Q: What do you call a masquerade?

A: an Impasta.

Q: What do you call a crocodile in a vest?

A: An investigator.

Q: What happens if you eat yeast and shoe polish?

Every morning you will rise and shine!

Q: "What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?"

A: "You can't eat tuna."

After the exam, the father said to his son, "Let me see your report card."

Son: "My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents. "

English joke (grade two) 80 words to be translated. He won.

Tommy: Johnny, how is your little brother? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.

Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?

Johnny: We played a game to see who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.

He won

Tom: Johnny, how is your little brother?

Johnny: He is ill in bed. He's hurt.

Tom: That's too bad. What happened?

Johnny: We played a game to see who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.

I have his ears in my pocket.

Ivan came home with a bloody nose. His mother asked, "What happened?"

"A child bit me," Ivan replied.

"Can you recognize him if you see him again?" His mother asked.

"I know where he is," Ivan said. "His ears are in my pocket."

His ear is in my pocket.

Ivan came home with a nosebleed. His mother asked, "What's the matter?"

"A boy bit me," Ivan said.

"Can you recognize him when you see him again?" Mom asked.

"I can recognize him wherever he goes," Ivan said. "His ears are still in my pocket."

A good boy.

Little Robert asked his mother for a penny. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"

"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.

"You are a good boy," mother said proudly. "There are 0 cents here. But why are you so interested in that old woman? "

"She is a candy seller."

Good boy

Little Robert asked his mother for two cents.

"What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"

"I gave it to a poor old woman," he replied. "You are such a good boy," mother said proudly. "Give you two cents. But why are you so interested in that old lady? "

"She sells sweets."

drink

One day, a father and his little son came home. At this age, boys are interested in all kinds of things and always ask questions. Now, he asked, "Dad, what does the word' drunk' mean?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there is a policeman standing there. If I think there are four policemen, then I am drunk. "

"But, Dad," said the boy, "there is only one policeman!"

Drunk

One day, the father came home with his youngest son. The child is at the age of being interested in everything and always has endless questions. He asked his father, "Dad, what does the word' drunk' mean?" "Well, son," the father replied, "Look, there are two policemen standing there. If I see that they are four, then I am drunk. " "But, Dad," said the child, "there is only one policeman there!"

treat cordially

The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest because there was no cheese in the apple pie she served. The little boy of this family quietly left the room and went to Amo. When he came back, he took a piece of cheese and put it on the guest's plate. The guest smiled, put the cheese in his mouth and said, "Son, your eyes are definitely better than your mother's. Where did you find the cheese? " "In the rat trap, sir," the boy replied.

Hospitality

When the guests were eating apple pie, the hostess apologized to everyone because there was no cheese at home. The little boy in this family left home quietly. After a while, he returned to his room with a piece of cheese and put it on the guest's plate. The guest smiled and put the cheese in his mouth and said, "Son, your eyes are just better than your mother's. Where did you find the cheese? " "On the mousetrap, sir." The little boy said.

English joke (10-30 words) The seventh grade dog and its shadow

A dog, with a piece of meat in his mouth, was crossing a stream and saw his own shadow in the water. He thought it was the shadow of another dog, with a piece of meat twice as big as himself. Therefore, he let go of his dog and attacked another dog fiercely, trying to steal his big piece from it. He lost two things: what he caught in the water, because it was a shadow; And his own, because the stream washed it away.

A dog came to a bridge with a piece of meat in his mouth. When he saw his own shadow in the water, he thought it was another dog with a piece of meat twice as big as himself. He quickly threw the meat into his mouth and attacked the dog in the water, trying to catch its meat. As a result, he couldn't get two pieces of meat. Because it's just a shadow, it's just his own shadow. The real meat was also washed away by the water.

Which do you think is more important, money or friends?

Friends, of course

A: Why?

I can always borrow money from friends.

Money and friends

Which do you think is more important, money or friends?

Friends, of course

A: Why?

I can always borrow money from friends.

Just translate seven words, a young woman is taking a nap. After waking up, she said to her husband, I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace on Valentine's Day. What do you think this means?

You'll know tonight. He said.

That night, the man went home with a big bag and gave it to his wife. She opened it happily, only to find a book called The Meaning of Dreams.

A young woman is taking a nap. After waking up, she told her husband, I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace on Valentine's Day. What do you think this means?

You will know tonight, he said.

That night, the man came home with a small bag and gave it to his wife. She opened it happily-only to find that it was a book called Dream.

Supplement:

Sentence means: sentence, epigram, law. Depending on the context, you can look it up in the dictionary.

Bird's Nest and Hair

My sister is a primary school teacher. One of her students told her that a bird has built its nest in a tree outside the classroom.

"What bird?" My sister asked.

"I don't see any birds, madam, only a bird's nest," the child replied.

"Then, can you describe this bird's nest for us?" My sister encouraged her.

"Well, madam, it's like your hair."

Precautions:

(1) notify v.

(2) nest n. nest; nesting

3. Description

(4) Encourage

(5) reassemble v. similarity; similar

18. Nest and hair

My sister is a primary school teacher. Once, a student told her that a bird had built a nest in a tree outside the classroom.

"What kind of bird is it?" Sister asked her.

"Teacher, I don't see any birds, only a bird's nest." The child replied.

"So, can you describe this bird's nest for us?" My sister encouraged her.

"Oh, teacher, just like your hair."

I just bit my tongue.

"Are we poisonous?" The young snake asked his mother.

"Yes, dear," she answered. "Why do you ask?"

"Because I just bit my tongue!"

Precautions:

Poisonous

Because I just bit my tongue because I just bit my tongue. Cause in the sentence is the abbreviation of cause.

I just bit my tongue.

"Are we poisonous?" A young snake asked its mother.

"Yes, dear," she answered. "Why do you ask?"

"Because I just bit my tongue."

A woman who fell down

It was rush hour, and I rushed to a train at new york Central Station. As I approached the gate, a plump middle-aged woman rushed up from behind, lost her foothold on the smooth marble floor and slipped on her back. Her momentum brought her close to my shoes. However, before I could help her, she had climbed up. She posed, winked at me and said, "Do you always make beautiful women fall at your feet?"

A depraved woman

During the rush hour, I hurried to new york Luxury Center Station to catch the train. Near the door, a chubby middle-aged woman rushed from behind, only to find that she slipped on the smooth marble floor and slipped on her back. Her inertia brought her close to my feet. I was going to help her, but she stood up by herself. She calmed down, raised my eyebrows and said, "Do beautiful women always fall at your feet?"

English joke stories

He won

Tommy: Johnny, how is your little brother? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.

Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?

Johnny: We played a game to see who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.

He won

Tom: Johnny, how is your little brother?

Johnny: He is ill in bed. He's hurt.

Tom: That's too bad. What happened?

Johnny: We played a game to see who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.

I have his ears in my pocket.

Ivan came home with a bloody nose. His mother asked, "What happened?"

"A child bit me," Ivan replied.

"Can you recognize him if you see him again?" His mother asked.

"I know where he is," Ivan said. "His ears are in my pocket."

His ear is in my pocket.

Ivan came home with a nosebleed. His mother asked, "What's the matter?"

"A boy bit me," Ivan said.

"Can you recognize him when you see him again?" Mom asked.

"I can recognize him wherever he goes," Ivan said. "His ears are still in my pocket."

A good boy.

Little Robert asked his mother for a penny. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"

"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.

"You are a good boy," mother said proudly. "There are 0 cents here. But why are you so interested in that old woman? "

"She is a candy seller."

Good boy

Little Robert asked his mother for two cents.

"What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"

"I gave it to a poor old woman," he replied. "You are such a good boy," mother said proudly. "Give you two cents. But why are you so interested in that old lady? "

"She sells sweets."

drink

One day, a father and his little son came home. At this age, boys are interested in all kinds of things and always ask questions. Now, he asked, "Dad, what does the word' drunk' mean?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there is a policeman standing there. If I think there are four policemen, then I am drunk. "

"But, Dad," said the boy, "there is only one policeman!"

Drunk

One day, the father came home with his youngest son. The child is at the age of being interested in everything and always has endless questions. He asked his father, "Dad, what does the word' drunk' mean?" "Well, son," the father replied, "Look, there are two policemen standing there. If I see that they are four, then I am drunk. " "But, Dad," said the child, "there is only one policeman there!"

treat cordially

The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest because there was no cheese in the apple pie she served. The little boy of this family quietly left the room and went to Amo. When he came back, he took a piece of cheese and put it on the guest's plate. The guest smiled, put the cheese in his mouth and said, "Son, your eyes are definitely better than your mother's. Where did you find the cheese? " "In the rat trap, sir," the boy replied.

Hospitality

When the guests were eating apple pie, the hostess apologized to everyone because there was no cheese at home. The little boy in this family left home quietly. After a while, he returned to his room with a piece of cheese and put it on the guest's plate. The guest smiled and put the cheese in his mouth and said, "Son, your eyes are just better than your mother's. Where did you find the cheese? " "On the mousetrap, sir." The little boy said.

English jokes

Last Friday, I wore an Adidas dress to play ball. An American saw it and laughed at me and said, "Really!

Do you know what this means? It means I dream about sex all day. I've been thinking about it all day

Sex, abbreviated as Adidas) "I'm surprised how he reacted so quickly. When Lenovo was so rich, he was there.

An American helped me. He said that there is a famous Korn choir, and one of their signature songs is

A.D.I.D.A.S (Dreaming about sex all day) So, this story is familiar to many Americans.

Can be detailed! It's your turn to make fun of America next time.

English jokes 40 English joke stories

He won

Tommy: Johnny, how is your little brother? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.

Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?

Johnny: We played a game to see who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.

He won

Tom: Johnny, how is your little brother?

Johnny: He is ill in bed. He's hurt.

Tom: That's too bad. What happened?

Johnny: We played a game to see who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.

I have his ears in my pocket.

Ivan came home with a bloody nose. His mother asked, "What happened?"

"A child bit me," Ivan replied.

"Can you recognize him if you see him again?" His mother asked.

"I know where he is," Ivan said. "His ears are in my pocket."

His ear is in my pocket.

Ivan came home with a nosebleed. His mother asked, "What's the matter?"

"A boy bit me," Ivan said.

"Can you recognize him when you see him again?" Mom asked.

"I can recognize him wherever he goes," Ivan said. "His ears are still in my pocket."

A good boy.

Little Robert asked his mother for a penny. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"

"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.

"You are a good boy," mother said proudly. "There are 0 cents here. But why are you so interested in that old woman? "

"She is a candy seller."

Good boy

Little Robert asked his mother for two cents.

"What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"

"I gave it to a poor old woman," he replied. "You are such a good boy," mother said proudly. "Give you two cents. But why are you so interested in that old lady? "

"She sells sweets."

drink

One day, a father and his little son came home. At this age, boys are interested in all kinds of things and always ask questions. Now, he asked, "Dad, what does the word' drunk' mean?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there is a policeman standing there. If I think there are four policemen, then I am drunk. "

"But, Dad," said the boy, "there is only one policeman!"

Drunk

One day, the father came home with his youngest son. The child is at the age of being interested in everything and always has endless questions. He asked his father, "Dad, what does the word' drunk' mean?" "Well, son," the father replied, "Look, there are two policemen standing there. If I see that they are four, then I am drunk. " "But, Dad," said the child, "there is only one policeman there!"

treat cordially

The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest because there was no cheese in the apple pie she served. The little boy of this family quietly left the room and went to Amo. When he came back, he took a piece of cheese and put it on the guest's plate. The guest smiled, put the cheese in his mouth and said, "Son, your eyes are definitely better than your mother's. Where did you find the cheese? " "In the rat trap, sir," the boy replied.

Hospitality

When the guests were eating apple pie, the hostess apologized to everyone because there was no cheese at home. The little boy in this family left home quietly. After a while, he returned to his room with a piece of cheese and put it on the guest's plate. The guest smiled and put the cheese in his mouth and said, "Son, your eyes are just better than your mother's. Where did you find the cheese? " "On the mousetrap, sir." The little boy said.

English jokes

Last Friday, I wore an Adidas dress to play ball. An American saw it and laughed at me and said, "Really!

Do you know what this means? It means I dream about sex all day. I've been thinking about it all day

Sex, abbreviated as Adidas) "I'm surprised how he reacted so quickly. When Lenovo was so rich, he was there.

An American helped me. He said that there is a famous Korn choir, and one of their signature songs is

A.D.I.D.A.S (Dreaming about sex all day) So, this story is familiar to many Americans.

Can be detailed! It's your turn to make fun of America next time.

An English joke that requires more than 100 words is beyond my dog's comprehension.

Mrs. Brown: Oh, dear, I have lost my beloved dog!

Mrs Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the newspaper!

Mrs. Brown: It's no use. My little dog can't read.

My dog can't read

Mrs. Brown: Oh,

Honey, I lost my precious puppy!

Mrs Smith: But you should put an advertisement in the newspaper!

Mrs. Brown: It's no use. My puppy can't read. "

Two birds

Teacher: Here are two birds, a swallow and a sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?

Student: I can't point it out, but I know the answer.

Teacher: Please tell us.

Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow, and the sparrow is beside the swallow.

Two birds

Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a sparrow. Who can point out which is the swallow and which is the sparrow?

Student: I can't point it out, but I know the answer

Teacher: Please talk about it.

Student: The sparrow is next to the swallow, and the swallow is next to the sparrow.

Ask for 50 words or so of English jokes in Grade Two, and you need 1.twobirds urgently.

Teacher: Here are two birds, a swallow and a sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?

Student: I can't point it out, but I know the answer.

Teacher: Please tell us.

Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow, and the sparrow is beside the swallow.

Two birds

Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a sparrow. Who can point out which is the swallow and which is the sparrow?

Student: I can't point it out, but I know the answer

Teacher: Please talk about it.

Student: The sparrow is next to the swallow, and the swallow is next to the sparrow.

2. New teacher

Gee left school on September 1st.

"Gee, what do you think of your new teacher?" His mother asked.

"I don't like her, mom, because she said three plus three equals six, and then she said.

0 and 4 are also 6 ... "

New teacher

On September 1 day, George came home from school.

George, do you like your new teacher? Mom asked.

"Mom, I don't like it, because she said that three plus three equals six, and later she said that two plus four equals six."

Hope to adopt

Ask for an English joke with about 50 or 60 English words, with translation. ~ ~ ~ ~(& gt； _< A smiling boy came home from the dentist, "Hey, Mom, the dentist said I didn't have cavities."

His mother looked at him with wide eyes and was very surprised. "It's impossible-you never brush your teeth after cleaning the chocolate box before going to bed!

Then the boy opened his mouth. He had no teeth!

I don't have cavities.

After seeing the dentist, the little boy smiled and went home: "Hey, Mom, the dentist said I didn't have cavities."

Mom's eyes widened in surprise: "No way-you always finish the candy in the chocolate box before going to bed and never brush your teeth!" " "

At this moment, the boy opened his mouth-all his teeth had been pulled out. ?