Africans tell funny jokes in English.

I will never forget Tuesday, March 7, 2006, the day before Women's Day, because something happened that day prompted me to make three very important decisions.

The day began as usual. At noon, I came back from eating out with my friend, a French lady. We approached the door of the unit and saw an old man collecting garbage opposite, pushing a cart in his hand. At this moment, Miss France poked me. "Did you see it?" "What do you see?" I'm surprised.

"Right in front of your eyes." I just found out that the old man opposite is a foreigner with a hunchback and only a few long, dirty and messy hairs. No wonder I'm a little nearsighted. At first I mistakenly thought I was a garbage collector. The stroller in his hand is not rubbish, but a mixed-race child. He was accompanied by a girl from China, a young, beautiful and tall girl from China.

The French lady smiled: "Why are you China women?" Miss France smiled, because we were just talking about this problem when we were eating. In fact, I have seen and heard the stories of such foreign men and China women for a long time, and I have never taken them to heart before, but the contrast in front of me is too strong-an China girl as beautiful as flowers and pure as jade and an old, ugly, short, bald and shriveled foreign man, and their baby pushing a stroller.

On the other hand, Miss France bent over with laughter (I don't know why she smiled like that). At that moment, as a China person, my self-esteem was deeply hurt.

A few days later, I made three decisions: First, I will tell you the ugly truth about some foreign men I know. Secondly, I want to mobilize the people of China to stop China women from circling foreign men. Thirdly, and most importantly, as a China scholar, I decided to temporarily suspend my normal work and devote myself to a study that has never been done before, that is, to study the image of China men in the eyes of foreign women, so as to help China men pursue foreign women finally.

My colleagues and I will first interview white women who live in China but have never had boyfriends in China to find out why. We should also visit white women who have had boyfriends in China and married men in China, and ask them to tell us the advantages and disadvantages of men in China. I know there are not many such foreigners. Fortunately, I have met some.

We will also conduct a large-scale questionnaire survey on foreign women (all white) in China, and adopt scientific measurement methods to finally get the image of China men in their eyes and find out the five most attractive China men in their eyes. All these studies will also answer the following questions:

Is foreign women interested in China men? What do single foreign women in China most want China men to do to them? How can China men improve their attraction to foreign women? What are the characteristics of China men who are most favored by foreign women? Which foreign women likes China men better? How to know foreign women? How to strike up a conversation with foreign women in public? When did China become a paradise for foreign men?

If you ask a foreigner, why did you come to China? He will probably answer that he likes China's long history, splendid culture, magnificent mountains and rivers, rapid development and great changes. But I tell you, except for a few foreigners who are usually stationed by the government and companies to be married and have children, most of them are related to the following two factors: First, the family is not doing well or can't get along at all; Second, find a woman in China.

John is such an example. Not long ago, I met him in the street, and a girl from China who was half a head taller than him held his hand. He said that his girlfriend in China works in a modeling company. In fact, if John hadn't called me, I really wouldn't have recognized him, because it was very different from the last time I saw him.

John is an American, 42 years old, and his height is 1.67 meters. I haven't found a permanent job in America because I didn't graduate from college. After staying in Africa for two years, I heard that many American gold-seeking stories in China came to Shanghai. I just arrived in Shanghai as a stranger, and I only had an English teacher in a school in a small town in Jiangsu.

Not satisfied, John worked in Jiangsu for several months before coming to Shanghai to find a job and staying in a small hotel for one day 12 yuan. I met him then. That day, I went to dinner with a foreign friend and saw them chatting together. I thought she knew John, so I invited him. Later, I learned that they just met by chance.

When ordering, John ordered a more expensive dish. A friend asked in English, the food you ordered is more expensive. Are you going to pay by yourself? Like a child who did something wrong, John hurried to return it at once. Seeing him shrink his head, I first told my friend in Chinese that it didn't matter, and then asked him to continue in English.

Later, because of work, I ran around and soon forgot about John. When I met him this time, he told me that he had found a job teaching English in a school in Shanghai. I haven't talked to John's girlfriend, but I can see that she once looked down on China people. Looking at her back, I can't help thinking that she must not know that her American John lives on others. This is too much like the story of the idol. Obviously, it was made by human beings themselves, and then they went to worship the movie.

On the bus in Shanghai, I witnessed a typical American street punk, holding a little girl from China in broad daylight, reaching under her clothes and touching her chest. China girls obviously want to express the pleasure of being touched by foreigners. Unfortunately, she can only say two words at a time.

A taxi driver told me that once I met a black man with a China girl in his arms in a famous bar street. At first, he thought that all the women in that place did special jobs and didn't care. It was not until later that they asked him to drive to the female graduate dormitory of a famous university that he was surprised.

It is reported that an AIDS patient was found in a hospital in Beijing. Before he died, the American businessman admitted that he had sex with six China women in just a few weeks. The survey found that most of them are senior intellectuals.

In China, there are a group of foreigners who can't find jobs in their own countries, and then take advantage of the advantages of foreigners to make money, drink and pick up girls easily in China. That's it. Their only hobby is criticizing China. What's more, some diplomats took advantage of their positions to play with women in China. Someone even said publicly, "My signature can handle any China woman."

China, you know what? You give foreigners so much that foreigners look down on you in turn. So many foreigners don't like it themselves, calling them white garbage. I'm here to tell those foreigners not to be too proud. All you get is a China woman's body, a soulless body.

Recently, a joke about a foreigner seeking marriage in China was widely circulated on the Internet: a 47-year-old foreigner sought marriage in a matchmaking agency in China, and no one asked for it for a long time. Suddenly one day, a large number of wedding letters came, which surprised foreigners. Later, it was found that his age was wrongly written as 67 because of the carelessness of the staff of the matchmaking agency.

A foreign-related marriage survey also confirmed that women in China don't marry foreign men mainly for love. The survey shows that the average age difference between China women and foreign grooms is 10.5 years old, and 13% of the couples are two generations, with a difference of 20 years. It is reported that in foreign-related marriages, the record was set by a sensational couple at that time, who were 54 years apart. When they got married, the American groom was an 82-year-old man, while the China bride was only 28 years old.

Coincidentally, I read a joke in an American magazine not long ago: an 80-year-old man accompanied his pregnant 20-year-old wife to the hospital for examination. The doctor kindly reminded him if there was any other possibility. The old man refused to say, "no, I can always work miracles." Last time I went hunting with my wife and one of her boyfriends, I only pointed my umbrella at a deer and the deer was shot. "

I don't know if the bride in China will get the news of pregnancy soon, so that everyone can truly experience the miracle on earth. You may have gained something, but you have lost the most precious dignity.

Needless to say, China women are the initiators of those ugly foreign men. But these women, most of whom have never been abroad, are full of fantasies. So, today I will take this opportunity to tell them the truth. If you find true love, I congratulate you and wish you all the best. Personally, I think that as long as it is true love, no matter how long or short it lasts in the future, it is worth pursuing.

Nevertheless, I still want to warn you. First of all, most women in China pursue a stable marriage. However, the divorce rate in western developed countries is around 50%, with almost no exception, and there are many factors leading to the instability of international marriage.

Secondly, I highly doubt that foreign men today will give true love to women in China. Because the premise of true love is respect, and in the eyes of foreign men, the image of China women has begun to be spoiled by those men, and has become the most open, bold, ulterior, simple-minded, ignorant, stupid and utilitarian Easygirl in the world. It's hard to imagine a man giving true love to such a woman. There is only one exception, an American said, and that is the desire of foreigners who regard Asian wives as maids/cooks/sex workers.

Maybe you just want money, and I understand that you won't stop you. But what I want to tell you is that you must promise two things before you die: First, this foreigner is really rich. Because I know that many foreigners in China don't have much money. Second, he is willing to marry you, because without marriage, his property may have nothing to do with you.

Maybe you want to go abroad, I won't stop you. But what I tell you is that you must make sure of two things before you die: first, this foreigner is willing to return to China. Although foreign countries are richer than us, they are by no means paradise. Unfortunately, many foreigners in China simply don't want to go back to China, because they can't find a good job in China, or even a job at all. They absolutely don't want to go back to the humble and lonely life in the past. Second, he is willing to marry you. Because if you don't get married, you can't get permanent residency in the other country.

A neighbor of my colleague's daughter married a farmer in a mountainous area of Japan. Neighbors often say, "we don't care about money now, a small sum of 100.2 million." In that case. But, neighbor old man, do you know that your woman is really happy in Japan? People in China are very proud. They always report good news instead of bad news. A few years ago, a China TV station went to the Japanese mountains to interview these China brides. From the bustling Shanghai to the remote and deserted cottage, what I heard from the bride in China was disappointment, gap and helplessness.

Maybe you did it for sex? An Australian woman, Ms. Shi, wrote ... I also have an extremely open and experienced girlfriend in China. However, when she had sex with a western man for the first time, she still felt a great shock. She told me about it on the phone, and she was very impulsive and wanted to marry the westerner at once. However, I calmly advised her that there are many western men who have wonderful sex lives, and at least eight out of ten are wonderful, two are average, and two out of ten men in China are average and eight are poor. "