Broadcast manuscript of school humorous stories

1. The teacher said: What do you mean, people enjoy drinking tea? Even if you see me at school now, you can say to me politely: hello, teacher! Ten years later, when you come back and see me, you will say, Oh, is that fat man still there? 2. The teacher said: What do you mean? Even if you see me at school now, you can say to me politely: hello, teacher! Ten years later, when you come back and see me, you will say, Oh, is that fat man still there? 3. One day, Xiaojun wrote a composition in the classroom: My home. Xiaojun wrote: "There are three people in my family, my father, my mother and me. When we go out every morning, the three of us go our separate ways and achieve the same goal by different routes at night. Dad is an architect, bossing around the construction site every day; My mother is a shop assistant and comes to the store every day. I am a student, and I am in a daze in the classroom every day. There are three people in my family with the same rotten tastes, and the family is harmonious. But when my grades were not good, my dad also fought with my roommate and brutally beat me to the ground, while my mother stood by and never tried to be brave. " 4. Teacher: Why Robin Delanat? Tagore's name is followed by1861-1941? Careless: That's Tagore's cell phone number. Teacher: What is the horizontal line in the middle? Carelessness: He doesn't want to disclose all his personal information. 5. In the golden autumn of September, the post-90s freshmen entered school, the richest generation, the most dazzling generation, the most awesome generation and the most "procrastinating" generation: sitting in an extended Lincoln, driving a BMW and carrying "five electronic parts"! English joke (1) The teacher wrote a sentence on the blackboard: Time is money, please translate it. A student replied, "Tom is Mary." Xiaoming said to the teacher in English class: May I go to the toilet? The teacher said, go. Xiaoming sat down. After a while, Xiao Ming said to the teacher, May I go to the toilet? The teacher said, go. Xiaoming sat down again. The classmate next to me couldn't help asking: Didn't you tell the teacher to go to the toilet? Why not go? Xiao Ming said: You didn't hear the teacher say "Fuck you"! English joke (2) One day, Liu Hongtao met a foreign guest and said, I am Liu Hongtao, and the foreign guest said, I am TM or square seven! When Jiang Qing met with foreign guests, she asked the translator to translate strictly according to her meaning and not go out of shape. As soon as the foreign guests saw Jiang Qing, they immediately kowtowed to her and said, "Miss Jiang, you are very beautiful." When translating, Jiang Qing was so angry that he had to be modest: "Where, where". The translator did not dare to neglect, and translated Jiang Qing's words into English: "Where? Where? " When the foreign guests were stunned, some people asked where to look good and simply kowtowed to the end: "Where, where." Translation: "You are beautiful everywhere." Jiang Qing is happy, but always polite: "Not necessarily, not necessarily." Don't look, don't look. English joke (4) It is said that on a certain day in a certain year, three archers got together and aimed at the apple on the servant's head ten feet away. The archer picked up his bow and whistled a long shot. The sharp arrow hit the apple. A proudly raised his chin, gave a thumbs-up and said, "I'm Hou Yi! Archer b shot the apple according to the script, and this time he shouted arrogantly, "I am Cupid!" "It's C's turn, and he also drew his bow and arrow! This result is exactly what the servant wants. It took him a long time to stammer out a sentence: "I ... I ... I ... am; Amplitude modulation ... unfortunately ... "English joke (5) People who study English hard will eventually achieve something. One day, I accidentally bumped into a foreigner in the street and said, I'm sorry. Foreigners should say, I'm sorry, too After listening, someone said, I'm sorry, three people. The foreigner was puzzled and asked, What are you sorry for? Some people have no choice but to say, I'm sorry. English joke (6) A passenger from Japan, on the way to the airport by taxi, saw a car passing by and said, "Oh, TOKOTA! Made in Japan! It's very fast! " Another car passed by and he said, "Oh, Nissan! Made in Japan! It's very fast! "The driver is a little unhappy and thinks he is too noisy! When the third car passed by, he was still saying, "Oh, Honda! Made in Japan! It's very fast! Later, when he arrived at the airport, the Japanese asked, "How much is it?" "The taxi driver said," 1000! The Japanese asked the driver in surprise, "Why is it so expensive?" The taxi driver replied, "Oh, the odometer! Made in Japan! It's very fast! "It's a nice day today ~ I'm in a good mood ~ What's unhappy about it ~ You can contribute to this radio station ~ I will definitely make you happy ~ Radio hotline 75757755~