There are homophone jokes

20 Jokes with Homophones

Jokes are short in length, simple and ingenious in plot, often unexpected, and give people a wonderful feeling that the God of Laughter suddenly comes. Most of them reveal the perverse phenomena in life, which are ironic and entertaining. There are different levels of interest. Below are 20 jokes with homophones that I have carefully compiled. Welcome to read and collect them.

There are homophonic jokes 1

1. In a lively market, a fish seller shouted: "Fresh fish!" At this time, a bubble gum seller immediately shouted : "Paotang! (Into the soup)" After hearing this, the fish seller said to the candy seller: "Hey, why did you say that my fish was in the soup?" The more they quarreled, the more fierce they became. At this moment, a bean sprout seller shouted again: "Bean sprouts! (Doo!)" A security guard came over and asked: "Who else is quarreling with them?" It happened that the oil fruit seller shouted: " You Guo! (I am here)" After hearing this, the security officer said: "Okay, take the four of you away together.

2. There is a Mr. Huang, his son is Huang Jun, he often I took my son on the No. 8 bus, so there were often funny scenes like this: Mr. Huang took his son to the station. When he saw a No. 8 bus coming into the bus station in the distance, he immediately shouted to his son beside him: Huang Jun, run quickly. , Route 8 is coming!

3. A man named Ah Shuang died one day. His family cried loudly at home: "How cool! So cool! "After their neighbors saw it, they asked them what happened. They said: "It's so good, so good. "

4. A crab accidentally bumped into a loach when he went out for a walk. The loach was very angry: "Are you blind?" The crab felt aggrieved: "No, I am a crab!"

5. In ancient times, a newly appointed county magistrate asked his steward to buy a bamboo pole. Since the magistrate was a foreigner and his accent was different from the local people, the steward misunderstood the bamboo pole as pork liver, so he went to the market to buy it. Pork liver, and by the way, he blackmailed two pig ears and put them in his pocket. When he came back, the county magistrate was furious and said, "Who told you to buy pig liver? Where are your two ears?" When the housekeeper heard this, he was frightened. He took out two pig ears from his pocket and offered them, saying, "Here are the two ears." "

6. A foreign girl married to China. During breakfast, she was told that she couldn't eat fried dough sticks: "You can eat it with dip." She stood up immediately and was told again: "You eat it with dipping!" She was confused and said aggrievedly: "Let me eat standing up. I have already stood up. Where should I stand?" "

7. A foreigner came to China and gave himself a Chinese name, Wei Mao. He was looking for a job in China. He came to a company and a man asked him: "You What's your last name? He replied: "My surname is Wei." "Wei what?" ""Why? Do I have to say why my surname is Wei? ”

8. Students from the Normal College say: I am from the “Normal College”. Students from the Railway College say: I am from the “Railway College”. Students from the Vocational College say: I am from the “Vocational College” Yes. A student from a technical college said: You guys talk, I’m leaving first.

9. In a small county, due to development problems, even the teacher’s Mandarin was not standard. One day, the physical education teacher shouted. : “Attention all soybeans, stew the wontons neatly! . "(Attention to all teammates, line up the teams in a small county town. Due to development problems, even the Mandarin spoken by the teacher is not standard. One day in the physical education class. The PE teacher shouted: "Attention to all the bean oil, stew the wontons neatly!" ( All teammates, please pay attention. We are in a small county. Due to development problems, even the Mandarin spoken by the teacher is not standard. One day in the physical education class, the physical education teacher shouted: "Everyone, please prepare the wontons!" (All teammates. Pay attention to align the lines neatly)

10. The coach said: "The first class kills the chickens, the second class steals the eggs, and I will make porridge for you." (Translation: The first class shoots, the second class drops bombs, I Let me give you a demonstration.) The coach said: "The first class kills the chickens, the second class steals the eggs, and I will make porridge for you." (Translation: The first class shoots, and the second class drops bombs, I will give you a demonstration.

) There are homophonic jokes 2

1. Regional culture

One of the class teachers went on maternity leave, and the school arranged for Li Xian, a geography student, to take his place. One day, the squad leader found Li Xiansheng and said anxiously: "Our class's blackboard newspaper for this month has not been published yet, and the school will conduct competitions next week. Please set a theme and ask everyone to provide manuscripts."

Li Xiansheng thought for a moment and said, "Go back to class right away and tell the students that this month's blackboard newspaper will be themed 'regional culture', with some particularly funny homophonic jokes."

The squad leader returned to the classroom and announced on the blackboard: The theme of this month’s blackboard newspaper is Hell Questioning.

2. Selling fish in the market

In a lively market, a fish seller shouted: "Fresh fish". At this time, a bubble gum seller shouted: "Paotang (soaked in the soup)" After hearing this, the fish seller said to the candy seller: "Hey, why did you say that my fish was soaked in the soup?" The more they quarreled, the more fierce they became. At this moment, a bean sprout seller shouted again: "Bean sprouts (fight)"

A security guard came over and asked: "Who else is quarreling with them?" It happened that a The oil fruit seller shouted: "I am the oil fruit." After hearing this, the security guard said: "Okay, let's take the four of you away together."

4. Dipping and standing Eat with it

A foreign girl married to China. During breakfast, she was pointed out to someone who didn’t know how to eat fried dough sticks: “You eat it with dip.”

She immediately stood up When she got up, she was told again, "You eat it with dipping!"

She was confused and said aggrievedly: "Let me eat standing up. I have already stood up, where should I stand?

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5. Li Dazhuang is afraid of his wife

Li Dazhuang, a famous scholar in Hebei Province, is very afraid of his wife. If he does not obey his wife's orders, his wife will punish him by sitting upright and twisting his hair into a needlework plaque. He placed a lamp bowl inside and lit the lamp. Li Dazhuang's body did not dare to move or breathe, like a piece of dead wood or a clay doll. Friends who saw him being punished all made fun of him. He said: You are a lamp stand that fills a gap in the house.

One day, his wife suddenly fell ill and had to use crows for medicine. The snow had not yet melted, so it was difficult to catch them with a net. Crow. Li Dazhuang failed to get a crow, and his wife was furious and wanted to beat him with a stick. Dazhuang was afraid, so he walked to the countryside on the sand and lured the crow with food.

A friend joked to him: The saint regards the arrival of the phoenix as auspiciousness. You caught a crow and escaped a beating from your wife. It seems that the crow is a black phoenix.

　6. Feng Shui

A man was about to die and asked his son to nail four large copper rings on the side of the coffin. The son asked him why. He said: You must listen to this in the future. Mr. Feng Shui said that it would be easier to move me around.

7. The dog doesn’t recognize it.

Two people were sitting together, and one of them placed a dog. He didn't say a word, just covered his nose with his sleeves.

There happened to be a dog nearby, so the man thought it was the dog that happened to fart. When the dog yawned, the man said to the man: Look, it still refuses to recognize it.

8. Painting Plum Blossoms

There is an unsigned plum blossom painting. Someone saw it and praised the painting very much. Someone asked him: Do you know who painted it?

Someone praised it. He said that he would win the exam and said: I dreamed of a drum band playing and playing and sending a plaque to my house. One of his friends said: I also dreamed of sending a plaque to your house with four words on it.

9. Laughing people pass the news

A new official took office. A village chief asked for a hundred dogs to be handed over to the new official. He bought ninety-nine dogs, but one was missing. He really couldn't buy them. , he cut off the horns of a sheep, mixed it with the dogs, and handed it over to the officials.

Sheep are ruminants and constantly chew food in their mouths. When the new official saw the sheep's mouth moving, he asked: Why does this dog's mouth keep moving? The chief replied: This dog is chewing maggots.

10. Laughing at a fool

Once upon a time there was a thief who often had money to buy things. A fool envied him and once asked him: How are you so good at stealing? The thief replied: There is a reason why I am good at stealing: whenever I go to steal other people's property, I put a branch where crows and magpies have nested in my hand, so that others cannot see me. When a fool sees a thief say this, he believes it to be true.

One day, he went to the crow and magpie's nest, took a branch and held it in his hand. Then he went to steal property from a house and was caught and beaten. When he was being beaten, the fool also said: You can't actually see me when I knock you down. ;