Complete works of classic jokes

Complete works of classic jokes. Listening to jokes and watching jokes not only make people always full of enthusiasm for life, but also encounter troublesome trivial matters in life. Let's watch a joke. As long as you smile happily, your troubles will slip away and your mood will be happy. The following is the complete works of classic jokes for everyone to share.

Classic jokes 1 1. Speaking of the advantages of boyfriends, it can be summed up in five words: "I will pick a girlfriend."

Second, I used to be a schoolmaster, just curious about the world of dregs, went in to have a look, and then got lost.

Three, four, looking for a boyfriend, you must find someone who will be mainly, or you will lose your temper every day, or I will simply recognize you as my brother.

Fourth, in fact, I like math very much. It has no circuitous language, no English grammar, no historical and political complexity and information. Just can't do it, can't do it, can't do it.

Five, eight quit to learn from the master, eat so many vegetarian meals and didn't lose weight, indicating that vegetarians can't lose weight.

6. It is said that in front of the person you like, your IQ will get lower. Can't I fall in love with the math teacher?

Seven, some people say that walking and playing with a mobile phone is easy to cause a car accident, which scared me to start running.

Eight, you said that you are my friend, in fact, I know that animal friends are really people.

Nine, "invite people to dinner tonight, are you free?" "yes." "Then you are on duty for me, thank you."

Ten, a large number of defeated women have made today's Ma Yun, Ma Yun has supported thousands of courier men, and the money earned by courier men has returned to the hands of defeated women, and it has also been used to make Ma Yun!

XI。 "Guess what the parents' meeting will look like after the mid-term exam." "Give birth to a second child."

Twelve, God gave you many opportunities to get fat, and you seized it.

Thirteen, please be careful when you ask my height in the future. It is said that kissing can grow taller. Please don't make me do anything.

Fourteen, don't be dejected and despondent, look down.

Fifteen, I took a buddy from my dormitory to play at home. When I met my dad at the door, I introduced him: "This is my dad." Who knows that buddy didn't know what was going on and called out, "Dad." My dad paused, sighed, touched my head and said, "Son, you have grown up. Dad respects your decision, as long as you are happy."

Sixteen, Dayu did not enter the house for three times, and his wife sang at home every day and missed him: Dayu missed those years, and he missed those years of love.

Seventeen, if you shout "bitch" in the street, the rate of turning back is definitely higher than calling beauty!

Stop calling yourself "single dog". Dogs will die at your age.

Nineteen, life has been so difficult, some things are not exposed.

Twenty, if you are in a daze, you will be deep, and if you are not doing well, you will fall asleep.

2 1. I remember you. You are the boy who fell into the cesspit for three hours and was salvaged. Not only does he have nothing to do, but he also burps while running.

Twenty-two, parents always have a group of schoolmasters, known as other people's children.

Twenty-three, wear the shoes of scum and take the road of learning hegemony.

When I was a child, I liked playing hide-and-seek best. When others hide, I will go home for dinner.

Twenty-five, the ideal is full, but the reality is very backbone.

Twenty-six, skipping classes too much. I wanted to go to class yesterday. Seeing the teacher, the teacher was surprised and said, I haven't seen you for so long, and I have grown so big.

Twenty-seven, two jiaozi got married and woke up the next day. Jiaozi found a meatball lying next to her and asked the meatball: Where is my daughter-in-law? Meatball said: Bah, you can't recognize people naked!

28. Some things can't be done until tomorrow. If you are lucky, you won't have to do it when you die tomorrow.

Twenty-nine, don't fail, I want to; If I don't study, I want what I want. You can't have it both ways. What the hell ...

Thirty, the teacher said, we are still young, don't fall in love, because we are all daughters-in-law who raise others, and it is not worth it!

Youth is like a skunk. You think you have caught its tail, but what you smell is just a fart.

Thirty-two, I'm a good girl you don't even look at, young man. Do you like men?

Thirty-three, other classes have good discipline, good grades and good physical education. Our class ... is just happy.

If you think I am wrong, please tell me. I won't change it anyway. Don't hide your illness.

My favorite month of the year is February, because I only need to be single for 28 days this month.

Encyclopedia of classic jokes 2 1 How long is a minute? It depends on whether you are squatting in the toilet or waiting outside.

Second, I don't even want to set the password of the bank card now. It's tiring to think about protecting two-digit deposits with six figures.

3. If you lower the ideal standard of choosing a spouse, you will find that those boys who are a little worse than the ideal type don't like you.

Fourth, "I am a good-tempered person, if one day someone steps on my bottom line." "What would that be like?" Then I'll lower the bottom line again. "

Some people like your face, some people like your voice, some people like your personality, some people like your life, but I am different. I don't like you.

6. Boys will get extra points for cooking, which is actually a false proposition. The key is to look at the face. Even if Song Joong Ki can't even wash rice, he can't wait to get extra points, but Wu Dalang can also make baked wheat cakes. Do you want to add?

Seven, forgive me for dressing up beautifully, holding a fountain pen, frowning and writing hard, just to help Xueba bottom.

Eight, those hurdles that you thought you couldn't get through in the past, you will gradually find that you only blame yourself for short legs.

Nine, the man who can't find the lantern, I want to say, is your lantern too dark?

I want to study hard. I don't want people to say that I am nothing but cute.

Eleven, speaking of the advantages of boyfriends, summed up in five words "will pick a girlfriend".

When I was born, God asked me whether I should have a good memory or be handsome. I have forgotten what I answered at that time.

Thirteen, the so-called good man, is not allowed to be cool to his wife, not allowed to make her jealous, quarrel must give in, but also beaten!

Fourteen, like to confess. If you were not rejected, you really thought you were a pure and beautiful little fairy.

15. Violence can't solve any problems. Why don't we sit down calmly and praise me for an hour?

Sixteen, others stay in bed because they have money, and they can sleep as late as they want. I'm different. I stay in bed because I have no money, so I can save a meal.

Don't talk to me because I don't understand. In others' eyes, I am stupid to quarrel with a pig.

Eighteen, like a person, you have to confess, don't care so much, although the possibility of failure is very high, but in case it becomes a spare tire!

Nineteen, nowadays girls don't go home on time, and their parents don't take good care of them. The girl in the opposite building didn't go home to take a shower today.

Twenty, after two mice got married, the mother mouse became more and more arrogant. One night, the male mouse wanted to scare her, so he went to the door to learn to meow. The wife said, "Mao Ge, stop screaming. My husband hasn't gone on a business trip yet. "

Twenty-one days at school The teacher said, "The topic of today's composition is for the teacher." As soon as the voice fell, a student stood up and said, "Teacher, please go to the hospital. We can't cure you. "

Teacher: "Xiao Ming, you started smoking at such a young age. Aren't you worried about the impact on your children in the future? " Xiao Ming: "The smog is so serious now. If he can't even resist second-hand smoke, then he will definitely not live in this world! " "Teacher:" ... "

23. In the teacher's office, the teacher said, "Your children's academic performance is too poor now, and exams are always dragging their feet." Parents suddenly got angry and said, "Don't you dare say that my children often drag their feet. My children are scared out of the classroom from time to time and have several classes a year! " At this time, Xiaoming nodded silently next to him.

I used to have a dog and named it "Stop". Every time: stop here, stop here. Before long, the dog went crazy.