An English short comedy script urgently needs to be translated into Chinese and English! ! !

A funny script for an English short play in both Chinese and English! ! ! English-Chinese version

Funny English drama script for 7 people: Three Laughter Three Kingdoms

Opening introduction: Ladies and gentlemen, let me introduct the actor. The first is zhaoyun, he is the most actor tonight .and his black brother zhangfei, and there boss liubei .don't forget the other side Mr cao, and his adviser JiangGan, and the most strong XiaHou Dun.At last, don't forget who behind the scenes ME---- the Director.

Act 1: Characters, Zhao Yun, Xia Houdun, Cao Cao and Jiang Qian

Narration: Not long ago, a black man rescued Liu Bei's son Liu Adou from Cao Cao's army. Come over here, he is Zhang Fei! ! ! (Zhao Yun appears) Not too long ago, a black general saved the son of LiuBei, Liu A dou.now, he is coming. His name is Zhangfei.

Zhao Yun: no! My surname is Zhao Mingyun, and I am Changshan Zilong! no! my family name is zhao my middle name is yun and my given name is zilong ~

(Zhao Yun took out a piece of cloth from behind, representing Adou)

Zhao Yun: Look! This is the last bit of blood of the lord! Liu Adou! I rescued him from the fire, but my own face had already... alas... turned into charcoal! (Gu Ying looks pity for himself) look! this is the last blood of the boss! liu e dou. I took him out from the fire, but my face hae already...ai ~.

(Xiahou Dun is standing tall The gun shoots out in a cat-waist shape)

Xiahoudun: Little thief, don’t run, or I will kill you (rush) Children, stop there or i will kill you

(Zhao Yun holds Adou with his left hand and fights with him with his right hand)

Zhao Yun: Damn it! How dare you sneak attack me! Fuck,!! you bitch dare to attack me?

(The two pretend to fight with several moves)

Zhao Yun: Look at my Nine Yin White Bone Claws! ! stop!! wait!!! one two three... nine dark white bone fingers!!

Xiahou Dun: Hmm! (Falling to the ground) oh my gad i'm over

Zhao Yun: It's not advisable to stay here for a long time, it's better to go find the master quickly! (Part 2) yeah~ bitch i will go to look for my boss, goodbye~

(Cao Cao and Jiang Qian enter)

Cao Cao: I didn’t expect that we could kill him the first time we sent out troops. The enemy fled! It can be said that he died before he left the army.

It makes the hero burst into tears! I didn't expect that we can beat the enemy with our first attack.

It reminds me of a poem, "Dead Before the Ship Even Sank. Long the hero Tearful"

Jiang Qian: Prime Minister, what you say is not necessarily auspicious. Prime minister, It does not sound good about what you have said;

(Cao Cao almost tripped over Xiahou Dun on the ground)

Cao Cao: Huh? Who threw this watermelon rind? (Turns around and sees Xiahou Dun lying on the ground) Huh? Who threw the banana rind?

Cao Cao: It’s Xiahou Aiqing. Is he engaged in what is called performance art? Don not Xiahou Dun?

Is he engaged in what is called performance art?

(Jiang Gan stepped forward and slapped Xiahou Dun. People stand up)

Cao Cao: Why do Xiahou Aiqing install watermelon rinds on the ground?

Xiahou Dun: There is a man with a face as black as There is a very black people with a baby in his band

Jiang Gan: She is the enemy’s nanny! And with a kid! ! ! it Is enemy's maid with a child in his arm.

Cao Cao: What about you? What did you do?

Xiahou Dun: i i i... i rushed to him and fight with him i'mfighting fightting fightting I I... I rushed to fight with him and fight

Cao Cao: What then? What then?

Jiang Qian: Prime Minister, it seems that General Xiahou defeated the enemy! Prime minister, it is likely that general Xiahou has defeated the enemy

Xiahou Dun: Hmm! (The gesture is as follows: pointing to the door, making a "nine" sign with the right hand, and then making a cold feeling all over the body, then pointing to his clothes, and then pointing to Cao Cao, making a claw strike gesture)

Cao Cao: What next? ? Then what happened?

Xiahou Dun: no no no I was defeated he used the nine cloud white bone finger, it's so terrible

(Cao Cao and Jiang Gan pulled (start)

Cao Cao: It seems that the enemy has not gone far yet.

Let's pursue victory! (Statement of generosity) It seems that the enemy should not go far. Let's run after them.

Jiang Gan: Sometimes I really admire your optimism, Prime Minister... (Statement of approval) Sometimes I really admires prime minister very much about your optimistic psychology......

Xiahou Dun: Hmm! Uh-huh~! (Raises two fists, as if to fight the enemy)

(Three people exit)

Act 2: Characters: Liu Bei, Zhang Fei, Zhuge Liang, Zhao Yun

(Enter Liu Bei, Zhang Fei, and Zhuge Liang)

Narration: This is Liu Bei and his team watching the enemy situation outside the military camp~~~LiuBei and his team are looking something out of his military camp.

,

(Zhuge Liang walked in front, followed closely by Zhang Fei and Liu Bei)

Zhuge Liang: (turning his head) My lord, it stands to reason that it is you who should leave. First! (Respectfully) old liu ah, you should walk in front of us! Is not it?

Liu Bei: No, there is a lot of shade behind you, military advisor. It would be good to hide here to escape the heat.

No, it's very cool that I stand just behind you, I can avoid summer heat

Zhuge Liang: (looking out) Lord, if what I expected is right, it will rain soon! liu ah, come here! I tell you a secret! I think it is about to rain!

Liu Bei: Mr. Fortune Teller! Incomparable to others! I don’t know how you know it’s going to rain? great prediction! No one can compare with you! just wonder how do you know it's going to rain?

Zhuge Liang: First of all, the weather forecast says it will rain today; secondly, look at the sky (with your finger forward), there is a black cloud coming over there! First, the weather report told us it is going to rain today; second, look at the sky, so many dark clouds are coming!

(Zhao Yun on)

Zhang Fei: Wow ! That's Zilong. I didn't expect that Zilong would change to a new desktop soon! Ha! That is person who called long ah, I could not believe that you have changd a new tabletop without a minute!

（Zhang Fei welcomes him）

Zhang Fei: Zilong! long

Zhao Yun: Yide save me! help!!! brother three.

(Zhang Fei exits)

Zhao Yun: Lord! Yun fought to the death to ensure that his little master was here! It's just that I haven't seen him cry for a long time, I'm afraid... (with a look of grief and anger, he takes out the cloth bag, opens it and holds it) boss, i have trid my best to protect the little boss. but it have a long time to hear nothing. i am afraid ...

Zhao Yun: kao! This little heartless guy can actually still sleep! Just like his father! ! oh ~ shit.how can the son of bitch get in asleep.just like his father

Liu Bei: Ahem!

(Zhao Yun turned to face Liu Bei)

Zhuge Liang: Zilong, I’m not telling you, you just have a weak mouth, so you can’t tell everyone the truth! ? Zilong, not I tell you, although it is true, you should not say it out!

(Liu Bei glared at Zhuge Liang, who seemed unaware. Zhao Yun stepped forward and handed the adou to Liu Bei, who held the adou in his hands. )

Liu Bei: You almost lost one of my generals because of this unfortunate boy like you! Why do I keep you here to catch up? I'll throw you to death! ! because of you, I almost lose a brave general! Why do I keep you alive, let me kill you! ! (Adou fell down)

(Zhao Yun stepped forward and kicked Adou wildly several times. Zhuge Liang stepped forward to hold him back. Zhao Yun kept trying to kick. Zhuge Liang suppressed Zhao Yun with his body and stepped forward. Kicked Adou away)

Narration: From now on, Adou's intelligence has been significantly delayed...

…This is why liu a dou is so foolish that lost his country.

Zhao Yun: Huh? Why don't you see Brother Guan? yi ~~ where is brothe two GuanYu?

Liu Bei: The second brother set up a Bagua formation for the military advisor yesterday, but he lost his waist when he rushed out to hit the horse. He is still recovering now! ：He laid out the BaGuaZhen for military adviser yesterday, but when he rushed out, he get his waist twisted, now he stay in bed.

Zhuge Liang: Hey, too bad, look at me, how healthy, how many robust! Tell him to drink more Sanlu milk powder! (narcissism)! Oh, It is so bad! Look at me, so healthy, so strong! tell him to drink more sanlu milk powder!

Zhao Yun: Just let this kid drink like this! ! ! (Steps forward, touches Zhuge Liang, and makes a gesture of pity) so you drink to be a foolish?

Cao Cao (in the audience): Ah~! ! ! (Tragic)

Liu Bei: Could it be that the third brother has returned to his old career? Let’s go and have a look! Did zhangfei return to one's former career? Go to see what happen?

(Three people exit)

Act 3: Characters Zhang Fei, Cao Cao, Xiahou, Jiang Qian, Liu Bei, Zhuge Liang

Narration: Turn back the time Go back to three minutes before the time set aside, zhangfei fight with caocao's army on changbanpo

(Zhang Fei enters, after turning around on the stage , appearing like a Peking Opera pillar, frozen)

Cao Cao and Jiang Qian: Hey hey hey hey! (Laughing evilly)

Xiahou Dun: Hmmmmmm... (Laughing evilly)

(Three people laughed evilly on stage) Ghostwriting script www.jiaokedu.com

Zhang Fei: Wow! Ham sausage, come back! ! Wa! You, The hot dog, come back!

Xiahoudun: Damn, another black man. Black men are all very awesome. I’m scared. . .

black man come again, Blacks are very powerful, i'm afaid

Cao Cao: Who are you, and why do you have such a beautiful voice! Excuse me. May I know your name? What a wonderful voice you have!

Zhang Fei: I am Zhang Yide from Yan (yān)! (clench teeth) I am Zhang Yide from jingdu! (clenches teeth)

Cao Cao: The eunuch turned out to be just a eunuch... Xiahou Dun, go up and deal with him!

You are the so called coward, aren't you? Xiaohou, beat it!

(Xiahoudun lowers his head and rushes out)

Xiahoudun: Ugh! Uh~uh!

(Two people fight together) (Freeze frame)

Jiang Qian: Prime Minister, we will lose this battle, and the bridge will be broken and the water will flow back in a while! Call General Xiahou to come down quickly. Prime minister, we must have lost this Campaign, the bridge will also cut off the water soon! Let's call General Xiahou to get down quickly

Cao Cao: How do you know? How do you know it?

Jiang Qian: "Dynasty Warriors III", Nagasaka's mission! ! "Really, it is the game's duty of Three countries Unparalleled Three"!!

Cao Cao: Come on, I think you are too addicted to online games.

This is a waste of time and body. You'd better listen to the Prime Minister's words! Cherish life and stay away from the three vulgarities!

I think you are too addicted to online games. What a waste of time, and It's harmful, listen to me, You must take good care of yourself.

（Zhang Fei and Xiahou Dun and the two continued, Zhang Fei shot Xiahou Dun)

Xiahou Dun: oh my gad i am over again was defeated again (Jiang Gan stepped forward and dragged Xiahou Dun back)

Cao Cao: Alas, the world has changed now, eunuchs are so powerful! ?

Why does that coward become so brave?

Zhang Fei: Cao thief, listen! You will not be able to cross this bridge today! cao, stops talking! Today you all can't pass this bridge with a live one!

Cao Cao: Don't be so arrogant! If my subordinates Dian Wei hadn't died today, Xu Zhu had diarrhea, Yu Jin had pneumonia, Li Dian had measles, Wen Pin had liver cancer, and Zhang Liao had hemorrhoids, I wouldn't have lost to you! shut up! If general dianwei was still alive, We would not be defeated!

Zhang Fei: After all, you have no one to use! Ah, facing this scene, I really want to write a poem - Nobody may go to battle for you, Facing this scenery, I really want to sing a song.er, on...On... ....(music starts) only you ~~~~~only...you...

(Xiahou Dun leaps up)

Xiahou Dun: Hmmmm... ( Cover your ears with your hands and run down)

Cao Cao: Ah! (Screaming and covering his ears with his hands)

Jiang Gan: Ah! (Screaming loudly and covering his ears with his hands)

Cao Cao: Could this be the legendary Mendelssohn's "Ghost Scream" Concerto in C major! Why is it so shocking! (Surprised) Why is this so shocking!

Jiang Gan: (Zhang Fei with one finger) Look! Prime Minister! The bridge is broken! The water is also starting to flow back! ! (Turns away and covers ears with hands) Look, Prime minister! The bridge broke! The water also starts to flow backwards (sound effect: the sound of landslides and earth cracking)

Cao Cao: aaaaaaaaaa (like vomiting blood in pain) ) (Freeze frame)

(Enter Zhuge Liang, Liu Bei, and Zhao Yun)

Zhuge Liang: Stop singing! If you keep singing, Cao Cao will be killed! Do not sing more, okay? if you go on singing, CaoCao will die because of your song!

Liu Bei: Third brother, stop it! ! (Covering ears with hands) Stop, stop! ! (Covering ears with hands)

Zhang Fei: only you ~~~~~only...you... (the lingering sound lingers)

Liu Bei: Zilong, hurry up and get rid of your third brother. Carry it back. Zilong, carry zhangfei back quickly.

Zhao Yun: Okay! ok

(Zhao Yun stepped forward, covered Zhang Fei’s mouth with his hand, and carried him away. Zhang Fei still sang non-stop)

(Zhang Fei and Zhao Yun exited)

Narration: From then on, there is a song that has been sung for a long time, called: only you~~~~ since then, a song becomes very very famous. The name is

《Only You 》.(The singing sounded again and everyone took a bow~~).