Laugh at the jokes of the three kingdoms

Laugh at the jokes of the three kingdoms

A joke about the Three Kingdoms: Guan Yu asked Liu Bei, "Have you ever seen a 3D movie?" Liu Bei said, "Third Brother, when did he make a movie?"

A joke about the Three Kingdoms (1) Cao Cao's sister.

Cao Cao said: Zhang Fei is the best general in the world, and few people can beat him. Will you die?

Cao Mei replied: Otherwise, Zhang Fei is notoriously brave and stupid, as long as he walks wisely.

Cao Cao said: Then you should be careful. If things get worse, hurry back to camp.

It is said that the two sides fought.

Cao Mei said to Zhang Fei, Are we better than Wen or Wu?

Zhang Fei was unhappy when he saw a little girl. Say: What's the point of fighting you? Humbiro, of course.

Cao Mei saw that Zhang Fei had been taken in and said, OK, let's each make three gestures. Whoever wins the gesture will win the battle.

Zhang Fei said: This is no problem. Let's get started. lady first

Cao Mei drew a circle in the air.

When Zhang Fei saw it, he drew a long strip in the air.

Cao Mei then stretched out a finger.

Zhang Fei held out three fingers.

Cao Mei touched her belly.

Zhang Fei waved.

Cao Mei was defeated and returned to camp immediately.

When he arrived at the chancellorship, Cao Cao asked, didn't you say that Zhang Fei was brave and foolhardy? What happened?

Cao Mei said: I feel strange too!

I said, Fiona Fang is my brother's territory;

Zhang Fei said that the Yangtze river basin is their brother's territory;

I said my brother is the best in the world;

Zhang Fei said that the three brothers are invincible in the world;

I said that my brother knows everything and is a very talented person;

Zhang Fei waved, meaning, is it possible?

So I ran back.

Zhang Fei went back and said to Liu Bei, I met Cao Cao's sister today, hehe, it was very interesting.

She asked me if I wanted to eat pie.

I said only eat fried dough sticks;

She asked me if I could eat a catty.

I said I want to eat three Jin;

She asked again, what should I do if I am full?

I waved my hand and said, is it possible? Haha, she ran away.

Zhang Fei's two Qin Bing described it this way:

Qin Bing answered: Cao Cao's sister said that hers is as big as her painting;

Qin Bing B: Zhang Fei must have said that his things are as long as his paintings.

Qin Bing answered: Sister Cao Cao must ask Zhang Fei if it is enough to do it once;

Qin Bing B: Zhang Fei definitely said that he would do it three times;

Qin Bing: Cao Cao's sister said what to do if she is pregnant.

Qin Bingyi: Zhang Fei's wave is none of my business.

Laugh at the jokes of the Three Kingdoms (2) Kongming's war of words is full of Confucianism.

It is said that when Kongming crossed the river to Wudong, he had to persuade the marquis of Wu to resist Cao. However, a group of civil servants in Wu Dong were very dissatisfied with Kongming, and they were prepared to make things difficult for Kongming and give him a duel, which triggered this debate. This debate scene is very similar to our online quarrel, so you might as well take your seats accordingly.

Wu Dong's first appearance was Prime Minister Zhang Zhao (asking about Zhang Zhao's internal affairs). Premier Zhang said at the beginning, Kong Ming, you dare to stand on your own feet and be happy at an early age. Will wind music bring Liu Huangshu's Confucius like you and touch all the books (lose)?

Kong Ming said: We are more polite than wind music, but we haven't compared ourselves to strings yet. Liu Huangshu himself is terrible. He has no soldiers or generals. what can I do? Fortunately, we can set Wang Bo and Xinye on fire and burn Lao Cao to pieces. How's your dad? I'll sit here and send emails. Why didn't you donate money for disaster relief?

Yu Fan, No.2 in Soochow, said, Aren't you afraid that Lao Cao has many troops and missiles?

Kong Ming replied: We are not afraid of anything. You still have so many American planes. What are you afraid of?

The third one who came up from Dongwu was Bushe (another word), saying, Do you want to learn from Su Qin and Zhang Yi?

Kong Ming said, what's the matter? You deserve to talk to me about Su Qin, Yi Chang! I deserve to talk about Su Qin. Zhang Yi's is not born yet!

The fourth is general manager Xue: Cao Cao is outnumbered, and it is beyond his ability for you, Mr. Liu, to confront Lao Cao.

Kong Ming said, what is this? Cao Cao is a traitor. Aren't you shouting for the traitors when you say this? Where is your position?

The fifth is political achievements: after Cao Cao became a celebrity, Liu Bei was just a shoe seller. Like Al Band-Aid, how can you compare with Cao Cao?

Kong Ming said: What happens when Cao Cao becomes a celebrity? He should not be anti-Party. Although I sell shoes, Liu Bei is ambitious. You are a boy who steals oranges. Do you think it's weird?

The next expression is grim: Kong Ming, do you have a paper to publish in a magazine?

Kongming said: No, why? Ains carpet is not as much as the paper you sent. It's not the same as Ains carpet!

Zhang Wen and Luo Tong still have to talk, and the meeting host Huang Gai announced the end of the meeting.

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