Jokes suitable for morning meetings

Jokes suitable for telling in the morning meeting

Jokes suitable for telling in the morning meeting. Every morning is a new beginning. When facing work, there is still a trace of If you are lazy, telling you some short jokes can also wake you up. Let's take a look at the articles I collected about jokes suitable for telling in the morning meeting. Jokes suitable for telling in the morning meeting 1

1. A man was passing through a cemetery at night and saw a fire and thought it was a will-o'-the-wisp. Then he threw a brick, and the fire moved to another grave. The man threw another brick, and then he heard: "Damn it! I can't even poop. I got two bricks in the same time I smoked."

2 , I didn't pay attention while washing the dishes, and dropped the bowl on the floor. It was okay, but it only lost a corner on the edge and became a small chip. Then continue washing the dishes. Without paying attention, my right hand passed through the gap... and it broke. I just thought: Is it really that fast? I can break my hand. Then I tried it with my left hand and it broke too. I thought: It's really fast enough. Wouldn't it be a disaster if this bowl was used for eating? Then I tried it with my mouth... my lips were also broken...

3. A pair on the bus As a couple, the woman is allowed to be touched by a pervert, while the boyfriend shows no expression. After arriving at the station, the boyfriend grabbed the pervert out of the car, beat him skillfully and then drove off with his girlfriend. A website analyzes the reasons for voting. Seventy-five percent of the people voted for "This guy is waiting for his skills to cool down..."

4. There is a bun shop near the subway station. The business is very good. There is a queue every day. Next to it is a train ticket. Sales point. I was queuing up to buy steamed buns today. When I was about to get there, I heard two men behind me saying, "Oh, halo, it turns out this is a steamed bun shop selling train tickets...ah, over there!"

5. I just sent a drunk guy home, and along the way he asked me to get a massage. When it was delivered to the door of his house, his wife opened it. My friend looked her up and down and said to me: "This...this...this lady looks like my wife, haha." I saw her wife's face twitching, seeing that I was there. It is also inconvenient to attack. Help him into the living room with me. He said he needed to go to the toilet, so he went in alone. As soon as he saw his wife, he answered the phone and slammed the door angrily and left. Just as I was wondering, this guy came out of the toilet and said to me: "I just called my wife and told her that she was working overtime at the company and wouldn't be coming back."

6. Once I went to a dungeon to brush up against the Warriors. ...Half an hour passed, and suddenly a message came out on the speaker that almost shocked me to death: Dear students of Zhejiang XX Mine Affiliated Middle School, the principal is here, run quickly...

7. Buy a pair of gloves, boss. I wanted thirty, I said thirty-five, but the boss refused and insisted on thirty-five. After talking for a few times and refusing to give in, I thought about it and let it go. I gave Zhang fifty, and he quickly found me for three. Fifteen...

8. In high school, our toilet had a door with a spring that could return by itself, but it could only be opened inward, not outward. Many people have a habit of kicking open the toilet door. Most people kick at about knee height. I have a classmate who has practiced martial arts. Probably to show off, or to maintain his flexibility, he always raises his feet very high and kicks at about chest height. One evening, this person went to WC, walked to the door, and kicked it without thinking. Our teaching director just finished his convenience, opened the door and walked out. So our dean was kicked hard by my classmate and kicked back to the toilet... 2 jokes suitable for telling in the morning meeting

1. I want to call you so much. I really want to. I really want to hear your nonsense, but it's a pity that you are overpaid. Fortunately, I can receive text messages. Send a warm text message to the fool, and hope it won't make him angry. Don't even choose heroic suicide

2. A boyfriend and girlfriend had a single name with the character for spring. One day, they called her "Chun, Chun..." downstairs in the girl's apartment. The girl upstairs poked her head and asked, "Who's name is Chun downstairs?" "Where?" The boy replied "I"

3. A hen jumped up on the fence and couldn't get down! The farmer said anxiously, "If you don't get down again, I will kill all the roosters."

"The hen is happy, "Haha, I can finally go find the ducks."

4. When people are sick, they want to use ginseng, but they find it expensive, and they want to use rehmannia, but they also find it expensive. He teased: There is a folk remedy, mix five cents of dried dog shit with red pond. The patient's spirit improved and he said, "Is it possible to just take dried dog shit?"

5. I will take you to play on the bike when we go down the mountain. I just discovered that the bicycle has no brakes. You told me that you didn’t even open your eyes. Tell you, I did too!

6. The elephant came to the elephant mother with a big belly and said sincerely. : Mom, we are sincere. Now that the raw rice has become cooked rice, please help us!

7. The mother snail was carrying the little snail on her back and accidentally bumped into the turtle in front of her. The snail The mother was heartbroken and said to the little snail: It didn't hurt, my child. It's all my fault that I ran too fast and didn't see clearly.

8. A recruit was practicing lurking in a tree. , two squirrels climbed up along his trouser legs, one of them said to the other: Boss, here are two big walnuts, let’s eat them

9. You are used to turning to the left I am accustomed to walking to the right. Fate has brought us together. Walking to the right is accidental, but meeting is inevitable. When our eyes met, I was delighted that you were excited. In front of everyone, you knelt down on one knee and said to me loudly: Boss, shoeshine?

10. A certain woman said: To find a husband, you must find a soldier. A certain man said: Why? The woman said: A soldier can sew by himself, and a soldier is physically strong. The most important thing about soldiers' diligence and thrift is that they are accustomed to obeying orders.

11. In fact, we can attribute all problems to two types: one is caused by hunger; 3 jokes suitable for telling in morning meetings

1. One day a woman went to the doctor with her child in her arms. After examination, the doctor asked whether the child should be fed breast milk or milk. He said breast milk, and the doctor asked the woman to take off her clothes. The woman wondered what he was going to do, but she still did it. The doctor put his hand in, touched and squeezed, and said with emotion, no wonder the child is malnourished, there is no problem at all. Breast. The woman said angrily, "I'm his aunt!"

2. He abandoned his fiancée a few years ago to go abroad. Now that he has a successful career, he begins to feel guilty. He heard that she was not doing well, so he wants to go. Make up for it. -

3. He went to her fish stall and saw a boy squatting next to her, who looked a bit like him. -

4. She stopped suddenly and pointed at the man at the stall next door: Why don't you cook for your child? He breathed a sigh of relief, turned around and left -

5. She handed him a cigarette. To the man next door: Sorry just now.

6. Sometimes, I feel that I really have nothing, as if I have been abandoned by the world; sometimes, I still feel lonely even though I have many friends around me; sometimes, I just walk by. When I see a familiar back on a familiar street corner, I suddenly think of a person's face; sometimes, I suddenly want to cry, but I am too sad to cry; sometimes, in the dead of night, I suddenly feel lonely deep into my bones; sometimes, Suddenly I can't find myself and lose myself...

7. Sometimes, just care if you care. So what if I care? At least I am willing to admit it. How painful it would be to refuse to admit that you care, to deceive others and yourself. When one day, I finally no longer care, I will be free and at ease. Will there ever be a day? Time will make you understand that all cares are asking for trouble, they are all constraints, and they must be let go. Life is like a pot of wine, everyone is the winemaker of his own life. Some people turn their lives into bitter wine, chewing on their misfortune, and the long river of time turns into an endless sea of ??bitterness; some people turn their lives into fine wine, savoring the nectar of life every day, and a hundred years of time Polished until it shines brightly. Don't complain about unfair fate, don't lament how difficult life is, no matter how hard the days are, you must live them with a smile. Life is a cycle, I have met some people and things, there is little happiness and a lot of regrets; there is little happiness and a lot of sadness; there are few successes and a lot of setbacks. Nine times out of ten, life will be unsatisfactory. In the end, what cannot be taken away are material things and money. Only memories accompany me, how helpless and how sad.

What is the meaning of true love? It does not necessarily mean that two people are happy with each other, nor does it necessarily mean staying together for a long time, but the connection between the souls.

8. Life is a process of constant giving up. When the old leaves, there is always something new coming, when a new story begins, the old story always ends. Destiny is not a mysterious force, but the fruit of the flower of oneself. Destiny happens as you choose. To know how much effort has gone into it, just look at how much fruit hangs on the tree. In life, the harder you work, the luckier you will be.

9. The most fundamental need of people is just a similar person with whom they can communicate. A moment of encounter is enough to have long-term memories in the future. Even if they are separated, those precious things are not far away, they are just buried deeper and exist silently, sadly and warmly. And the strange things nourished by it are more vivid and perfect, and lonely and long-lasting.

10. Life is a process of cultivation. Why treat people and things with such an unfair heart? You will fail yourself and let down the years. I can't control my destiny, but I can choose how to face reality. Love is greater than hate, tolerance is more powerful than punishment, all ignorant behaviors can be forgiven, please be kind to yourself, don't do evil, and practice good.