What are some funny jingles?

1, I watched a Hong Kong film at noon today … and saw a little dirty plot! The heroine was arrested for a crime. The warden asked the heroine to work in the kitchen, but the heroine didn't want to! As a result, the prisoner said, you can't go to such a good place! Cucumber and eggplant can be eaten or used. ...

I also told a story about beating flies. My colleagues and I went to the food stall and found a pair of flies hovering across the wall. I took it with a magazine. At this time, the female colleague said, have you hated it longer than you? What I want to say is that this joke is so popular?

3. I asked Lao Fu to go to the nightclub to have fun and said to the foreman, "Go, go and call all the girls with the word' Jie' in your store name to my eldest brother!" Lao Fu was puzzled: "Xiao Er, how did you arrange this?" Yu Xiaoer smiled and said loudly, "Because today is Fu Qinjie!"

I have a crush on a girl in my class. Because she is not good at expression, she always wants to do something for her. So I pretended to be sick. When they were in class, I sneaked into their dormitory and stole her unwashed clothes, ready to take them back to help her wash them. As a result, the housekeeper caught me as soon as I went out. Looking at my underwear, I was sent to the guard room. ...

An old man thought that his grandson was different from himself, and suspected that his daughter-in-law was born to Lao Wang next door, so he went to have a DNA test. As a result, it turned out that he was not his grandson. The family's attitude towards his grandson has changed a lot. He often scolds and scolds for no reason. After the son who went out to work came home, he looked at his son pitifully and went to have another DNA test ... it turned out to be his own father and son. ...

6. I am a literary and art committee member in my class. I took a refueling video for the school party the other day! Because of shyness, I was asked to mosaic my face. As a result, the next day, I met a male classmate and shouted at me happily: "I watched your video yesterday and the code!" " "There are so many people around! Shame!

I heard two women chatting on the bus yesterday. A woman suddenly said, "The chrysanthemums itch!" I was shocked at that time, thinking how this woman was so open! I was just about to look back at this woman's true face when another woman said, "I think it's better to raise cactus." Khan, my mind is so evil!

8. I watched a food program the other day. The hostess drinks tea in the old man's house, which is very expensive. The woman asked, "What's the benefit of this tea?" Old man: "Good for both men and women." The woman asked again, "What are the benefits of Shenma?" The old man calmly replied, "quench your thirst."

9. One day, I went to a sister paper house to play. I played a little late and I was hungry. I asked my sister paper, "Do you have anything to eat at home?" My sister blushed and said, "I have two steamed buns." "Well, I think." Then she went to get two steamed buns. I wolfed it down and choked a little, so I asked, "Is there anything to drink?" "I have milk."

10, accidentally caught by the finger of the door handle last night. Although my finger is not broken, it is bloody. I was seen by a female colleague at work today and asked, "What happened to your finger?" I replied with a sad face, "Don't mention it, I was arrested last night." Female colleagues face reddish "hum! Serve you right! Let you touch it. " Oh, I'll go! Say I deserve it. What do you mean by blushing? No, we have to ask this clearly.

1 1. At this time, my girlfriend told me that her boyfriend promised to stay with her forever and give her happiness of three meals a day! I looked at her and said, are you sure your boyfriend can give you happiness of three meals a day? ! It is also possible that he finished the dishes before he finished washing them! ! My best friend, wait a minute. She doesn't even look at me right. ...