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My husband scolds me and my family every day when I come home. The scolding words are extremely unpleasant. What should I do?
My husband scolds me every day when he comes home, and every time he scolds my family members together. The scolding is extremely unpleasant. What should I do?
The Iron Tree Blooms, Hundreds of Questions and Answers
Treat others in their own way. Accommodation and grievance are not long-term solutions. You must find a way to completely solve the problem. If it is really bad and you scold someone when you come home for no reason, then scold him back at your own expense. Not only at home, it is best to scold him when you see him, regardless of the occasion, without worrying about his face. and feelings, it doesn’t take three rounds, and the result will be clear, either divorce, or I will never dare to scold you again, and there is another possibility, that I will beat you. If you don't want to leave him, you can try this idea and take safety measures in advance. Although it is said that human nature is inherently good at the beginning, in fact, it is also accompanied by evil. Sometimes being too accommodating will indeed encourage some people's arrogance. Then don't give the other person a chance to scold you, and don't give the other person a chance to do domestic violence. Not once did he give in.
The example of the subject sounds incredible. In fact, this situation is not uncommon. Everyone has their own way of dealing with it. Which method is effective? Is it positive or negative? No one knows. In short, you cannot let others curse you, even if that person is the person closest to you, you will never allow it. During the period of disaster syndrome, I always paid attention to negative information. I came across several similar instances. One of the senior students was almost killed in his sleep because of his accommodation. I would like to share it with you in the hope that it can inspire you.
The senior was once a person who hated marrying. Due to the pressure of domestic customs, he hurriedly chose a boy whose external conditions seemed so-so and acceptable, and prepared to get married in order to provide comfort to his parents and those around him. One person to explain. When she returned from studying abroad, she was not too old. She graduated with a doctorate degree at the age of 26. No one outside the country thought that the 26-year-old was a great leftover woman, nor would they think she was a master of extinction. It was different when she returned to China, and her parents only had one child. They hoped that she would get married early and start a family. People of the same age in China also got married early. Although she was considered a golden phoenix, she had to worry about her parents and family. and the feelings of family and friends.
The boyfriend she chose was pretty good at the beginning. Although he was third-rate compared to her, he married down and found someone who matched him in every aspect. It was not It's an easy thing. Not everyone can be as lucky as the queen, so I don't think about it so much. Before the marriage was finalized, they had their first quarrel because when her boyfriend came home, he disliked her for not being able to cook, do housework, and take care of him with basic necessities. She immediately broke up with him. I am ready to give up on this marriage partner.
Because she proposed to break up, the relationship between them was eased and they did not break up. After a while, one day, just like you said, she was raped by her boyfriend when she returned home. The scolding made her confused. The ferocious look of her boyfriend made her feel scared, so she went to find her boyfriend's boss to ask what was going on. I don’t know whether she found the right person or the wrong person. Her boyfriend’s boss said: You really shouldn’t be boyfriend and girlfriend. His personal qualities are not worthy of yours. He is also so domineering in the workplace and often scolds her. My colleague has been reported many times, but his work ability is not bad, so he has been tolerated.
After the senior came home, he explained the situation to his parents. The parents didn’t know what to do. It didn’t mean that they would protect their daughter when someone scolded them, but they wanted their daughter to reflect on herself. , look for your own reasons, and determine that there is something wrong with that boyfriend, and it is not too late to break up. It was precisely because of her parents' objective persuasion that she decided to have a good talk with her boyfriend, asking him why he cursed, and asking her what she did not do well enough or what mistakes she made. Her boyfriend said that she was not at fault. As for not being able to cook, not doing housework, and not taking care of his food, clothing, housing, and transportation, he said that he did not live in time, but that he could take his time with food, clothing, housing, and transportation. He admitted that it was all his fault. , and promised to change it.
The good times did not last long. He got angry and cursed at others when he came home again. When he threw things, the senior moved faster than him, so he smashed everything in the house because she had had enough. I don't want to continue with him anymore. The two were going to liquidate their finances and then break up. It turned out that everything was paid for by the senior, and the man turned out to be like a parasite. They had been together for several years, and they had never made up their minds because of constant problems. Get a marriage certificate. The account was settled, no matter who dropped the thing, it was the senior who paid the bill. The senior's boyfriend seemed to have really repented and asked to give him another chance. He said that he would definitely change, and he also found the senior's leader. , ask the leader to help and plead for mercy.
It really worked for the leader to take action, because the leader also provided a guarantee in the middle. Because of this incident, his boyfriend got into a heated fight with the leader and became good buddies. Their love relationship also continued to develop, and they had many small fights. Anyway, the senior would never let him rub his nose in his face. He was not allowed to scold or hit him. If there was anything, he would communicate well and if he had something to say, he would be nice. explain. Her boyfriend also agreed, and they communicated with each other several times, and talked to each other several times if there were any problems. It seemed that the situation should be on the right track. Her boyfriend suddenly lost his job, and he couldn't find a job again. I went out to look for a job every day for half a year, but to no avail.
It doesn’t matter if you don’t have a job. The senior can support the family by himself, so he reassures his boyfriend that there is no need to worry. Her boyfriend also listened, but he couldn't stand the pain of not having a job. He wanted his senior to pay for him to study abroad. To study abroad at his own expense not only requires funds, but also needs to pass the language barrier and calculate the cost. The senior felt that it was really more expensive than raising a child, so he discussed with his parents whether they should agree. Parents completely disagree on this matter. They marry and discipline their daughters so that they can have a happy home, not to raise men.
The senior did not tell her boyfriend’s parents’ attitude, but just gave him money as usual so that he could still live a normal life and not be unable to survive because he was unemployed. I don’t know if her boyfriend can’t wait, or he guessed that her parents would not agree. After all, studying abroad is not a small sum of money. Ordinary families have a hard time supporting their children, not to mention that they are just boyfriend and girlfriend, and there is no relationship. Once you get a marriage certificate, you are not legally a couple. Neither of them said much, and both of them were thinking about how to handle this matter.
One night, the senior suddenly woke up from her sleep with pain. In her sleepy state, she instinctively reached out to touch the painful part. Her hand came across a sharp knife, which was inserted into her ribs, and she felt a jolt. She woke up completely. In front of her was her boyfriend's twisted face. The knife was inserted by her boyfriend with one hand while she was sleeping.
The knife was on her body, and blood was all over the bed. The two of them looked at each other, and no one spoke or moved. After a three-hour stalemate, her boyfriend suddenly pulled out the knife, and fell over as if possessed by an evil spirit. Went to sleep.
After observing that he fell asleep, the senior quietly stepped over her boyfriend's body and walked out of the house quietly. She took nothing with her, barefoot, wearing pajamas, and covered in clothes. He was bleeding and his wounds were not bandaged, so he ran away from home overnight. She didn't dare to take anything, fearing that her boyfriend would wake up suddenly and really kill her. She also didn't dare to go back to her parents' house, fearing that it would bring disaster to her parents. She went directly to the office first and did a simple bandage in the office. , changed into spare clothes, prepared the formalities for asking for leave, and left the office. She needed time to think about this matter and how to deal with it.
If her boyfriend is prosecuted, he will definitely be held criminally responsible. Then, it is very likely that her boyfriend's life will be over. If she didn't sue her boyfriend, her life was really threatened and she might indeed die at his hands. Everything was done in her sleep. She didn't know what his mental state was like at the time. , I don’t want to have any more communication with him, but I must handle this matter properly. Due to excessive bleeding, she was already a little confused at the time. She looked for her best friend in a daze, without explaining the reason. She only said that she wanted to stay at her house for a few days. After that, she didn't know whether she fell asleep or fell into a coma. , when she woke up again, her boyfriend was looking for her everywhere.
The senior’s best friend also received a call from her boyfriend. Maybe she thought something was wrong, so she directly added the other person to the blacklist. She wanted to wait for the senior to wake up and then ask her what was going on. Senior Before she woke up, her boyfriend came to the door. The senior's best friend told him that he hadn't seen the senior and asked him not to come again, otherwise his best friend's family would have objections. The senior was concealed and lived at her best friend's house. After that, all the people in the senior's address book were contacted by her boyfriend. Because she didn't bring anything with her and they were all at home, she gave them to her boyfriend. Opportunity for friends to find her vast trove of private information.
After the senior woke up, she told her best friend the whole situation. The best friend felt that it was inappropriate for anyone to interfere in the matter and asked the senior to think about it carefully before deciding what to do. Before making a decision, the senior's boyfriend will not be allowed to find the senior. The senior felt like she was going through purgatory in her heart, and her boyfriend must have been the same way because he was looking for her crazily and threatened the senior’s friends. If they didn’t hand over the senior, he would cause trouble. Even the senior’s leader, The guarantor was also threatened by her boyfriend because he didn't believe the senior asked for leave and thought the senior was hidden in the workplace.
It was also because her boyfriend was desperately looking for the senior. No one knew at the time that the senior had escaped from home with wounds all over his body and bleeding wounds. Instead, they only heard her boyfriend say, They had a fight and the senior ran away from home in the middle of the night while he was sleeping. The senior’s boss was even very touched by her boyfriend’s infatuation. He thought that the senior was too fond of sex. Her boyfriend, who loved her so much, disappeared in the middle of the night. If it weren’t for the leave procedure, he would probably have called the police, thinking that it was a girl’s love. Female doctoral students love to do it more, and they have a way of fixing their boyfriends. Little did they know that the senior was still in shock at the time, thinking about how to deal with the aftermath, how to ensure that his family was safe, and at the same time struggling in his heart to send him to jail. , let him go.
The senior later decided that she should explain the actual situation to her uncle. After receiving the information, the uncle immediately met with the senior and agreed with the senior’s approach. It was indeed possible to put the family in danger. However, the senior Identity information and confidential work documents must be obtained. According to the senior's plan, she accompanied the senior back home, but everything still didn't go well because her boyfriend threatened to kill the senior's family if she dared to break up. Anyway, he didn't want to live without the senior's life. The senior's uncle said that if he dared to raise a finger with the senior, he would chop off one of his thighs. This sounded like a joke, like two people who were deliberately talking harshly, but in fact they were really communicating about life and death. , the senior only asked to take out the information that she had to take away, and did not have any communication with her boyfriend.
Her boyfriend suddenly knelt down in front of the senior's uncle and begged for forgiveness again. The senior's uncle didn't know how to deal with it for a moment. The senior ignored her boyfriend's kneeling and just packed up various personal information. After packing up, he and his uncle were about to leave together. Her boyfriend saw that even kneeling could not stop the senior from leaving, so he called the police on the spot. Seeing this, the questioner and all the veterans may not be able to understand it. Yes, the senior was also surprised by this. She really didn't expect that her boyfriend would call the police. The senior's uncle was even more confused. The call to the police was unsuccessful because the police heard her boyfriend's reason for calling the police and did not meet the conditions for calling the police and did not deal with it.
The senior’s boyfriend was like crazy, yelling and cursing at 100, saying that the police did not act and ignored his affairs, and threatened to sue the local police station. After scolding the police, she turned around and threatened her senior and her uncle to take them all to court. The senior was dealing with confidential documents urgently and ignored her boyfriend at all. The senior's uncle asked him to calm down and asked if he wanted to sue. There must be a reason for whatever they are doing. You might as well talk to the senior's uncle first. When the senior finished handling the confidential documents, the senior's uncle finally listened to the senior's boyfriend's accusations and demands.
The senior’s boyfriend thinks that he is a rare good man. He does not smoke, drink, or play mahjong. He has never been involved in pornography, gambling, or drugs, and has no other bad habits. The senior chooses He was a match made in heaven. As for academic qualifications, abilities, income, etc., that varies from person to person, and it is not his fault. He was born in a poor family, so he did not have the opportunity to grow up and excel like his seniors. During the few years they were dating, he had never had second thoughts. He was only focused on growing old with his senior. Now that his senior suddenly wants to leave him, he is taking his life. It's okay to take his life, but at least he must give it back. Half, otherwise no one would be able to survive.
The senior's uncle felt that the situation was really getting worse, so he could only find a group of people to come over to help. At least he couldn't start a fight on the spot, for fear of hurting the senior. The senior refused to let outsiders in. Although the fear of being stabbed was still there, the wound had not healed yet, and it would still bleed when she was pulled, she did not want things to get worse. The senior's boyfriend felt that no one else should be allowed in. Perhaps the senior still cared about their relationship, so he didn't continue to yell. Instead, he asked the senior to come back when his anger subsided and not to stay outside for too long. The plot suddenly changed. Both the senior and her uncle were a little confused and worried that there would be other changes, so they rolled away while her boyfriend went to the toilet.
There are some people you really can’t afford to offend, and you can’t hide from them. If you don’t have the idea of ????death together, you are really not an opponent. When you encounter them, you can do nothing but hide. , because they can’t bear the consequences of getting along. After the senior left, she began to prepare for the family to immigrate. She felt that she would not be able to survive in the country because of the existence of her boyfriend. Even if her boyfriend is sent to jail, he will definitely not be sentenced to death for attempted murder. He will still come out one day. After he comes out, the senior family will never have a peaceful life. Maybe it was not the sudden death in a dream. If a knife is inserted, it is very likely that there will be no chance of waking up. Perhaps, sometimes people really have their destiny. The senior has encountered it and experienced it. He has nowhere to redress his grievances and nowhere to attack him. He can only admit that he is unlucky.
The senior’s story is very long, and there are many bloody plots. Those are all things that she can’t do anything about. People have to worry about all aspects in life. When they don’t want to cause the other person to die, there are some things that they won’t do. If you do it, you will suffer a huge loss, and the other party will really hurt you, or even commit a crime against you. When you don't want to kill yourself, avoidance is also an effective way, at least it will not let things continue to worsen and you will not continue to be in danger. It’s hard to guess how bad or serious the problem is. You still need to weigh and measure it yourself. It’s definitely not okay to be scolded when someone comes home. Everyone may have different methods, and there is no universal science. The method is to find a solution based on your understanding of him.
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