Ten jokes: After Brother Monkey came back from learning the scriptures, his life was very chic.

1, at night; I was lying in bed, playing with my mobile phone. The son whispered, "Dad! Dad! Dad! " I said impatiently, "What do you mean? Didn't you watch me play with my mobile phone? Call dad again, and I won't hit you! " The son was silent for a while and roared, "Dude! You crushed my exercise book! ! ! ......"

I called the elder sister of the person I like and invited her to see a movie. After the phone was connected, someone shouted: Haha, my sister has always liked you ... Then the other end of the phone quieted down. For a moment, I vaguely heard a subtle voice saying: I like farting, but it's not him. ...

I quarreled with my wife and regretted not letting her go afterwards. I want to buy her a necklace, but I don't know how long it should be Find a rope to measure when you sleep at night, and then my wife wakes up. ...

At school, the instructor was about to leave after the military training. The students could not help crying, and the instructors wiped their tears with handkerchiefs one by one. He wiped it twice when he wiped it for me, only to find that I didn't cry. This is embarrassing.

My mother has three sisters, and she is the third. When I was a child, I went to my grandmother's house and met menstruation and my second aunt. I just haven't seen my third aunt. Later, many times, I asked my mother, "Mom, my sister and they all have third aunts. Why don't I? " My mother said, "Think for yourself." I thought about it and said, "Mom, is my third aunt dead?" I will never forget that beating.

September 3rd is a national holiday, so the question is: How do friends who work in Japanese enterprises remind their bosses? Taijun, Baruto asked me to take a message for you. Today is the day when you surrender. I have to go back and celebrate. ...

8. When I was a teenager, I came out to make money, from nothing to penniless, and then from penniless to heavily in debt. This is me, a different fireworks, I am me, I see myself angry. ...

9. A friend's child is about seven or eight years old. He asked his father, "Dad, do you think time is more important or money is more important?" "Of course, time is very important." "Let's go to the supermarket to buy toys. Although it is cheap to buy online, it will take several days. " There is nothing wrong with the question and the answer. In this way, I was caught alive!

10, Wife: Honey, is your blood pressure high? Husband: How is that possible? My blood pressure has always been normal! Wife: Is it really normal? As long as it's not high! Husband: Wife, what do you mean? Wife: I was cleaning at home this afternoon and found an envelope in the flowerpot! Husband: Ah ... I saved 1 year! !

A happy smile

What does this mean?

Stop talking, I have to go to work.

Master, come down and let me do it myself. You drive too slowly!

Two big men are afraid of a cat.

Monkeys live a very natural life after they come back from studying classics.