Five two-part allegorical sayings, five words, 1 humorous story, 1 wonderful dialogue, 1 cross talk.

Whips don't hit sticks-eat soft and eat hard.

The beaten dog bit a chicken-take it out on others.

Beaten tortoise-shrinking its neck

Ducks are running around with knives.

Apologize for being slapped.-Flattery.

Man: You can't guess? Guess hard!

Guo: Hard to guess?

Man: You really can't guess? I can't guess. Let me tell you something.

Guo: Then tell others.

M: My last name is Luo, and my name is long-winded.

Guo: You, you are wordy enough.

M: Hello ~, yes, yes, it's me.

Guo: Hmm.

M: I want to talk to Xiao Wang. Hmm. My fiancee!

Guo: Oh.

M: Mm-hmm. Hey, she is a woman.

Guo: Nonsense! I thought it was a woman.

M: Don't give me the wrong number. All right. Thank you. I will wait for her for a while. tetrodotoxin ......

Guo: What, you want to sing? Hmm? what are you reading?

Man: What's wrong with you guys?

Guo: What's the matter?

M: Waiting to make a call?

Guo: That's true.

Man: Oh, you, will you fight over there? Take the tram for three stops. There is a telephone over there.

Guo: Did you have someone call over there?

Why are you calling here? I'm early! I have to have four hours, something like that.

Guo: Boy! He made it entirely by himself.

Ma: Die hard, Rowen! Hey, hey Xiao Wang! I'm wordy.

Guo: Don't mention the name.

Hey, I was looking for you. What can I do for you tonight? Nothing! Study? Do not study. Meeting? No meeting.

Guo: Nonsense.

M: Discussion? Don't say it either.

Guo: Is she all right?

M: Great. Shall I invite you to the opera?

Guo: Hmm.

M: All the tickets have been bought. Well, Chang 'an Grand Theatre. Downstairs, row 10, number 3 and number 5, we are next to each other.

Guo: That's right.

M: Well, how much is the fare? Eighty cents each.

Guo: Oh.

M: I will spend 1.6 dollars on two flowers. 1.6 USD. I gave him $5, and gave me $3.4.

Guo: Oh, he pays the bill here.

M: Hehe, huh? What kind of play? Guess.

Guo: How do people guess?

M: Huh? New play, no. Hmm? Pingxi, no. Hmm? Yue opera, hey ~

Guo: That's right.

M: No. ..

Guo: No, you are too embarrassed!

Man: Ah, you can't guess? I can't guess. Let me tell you something.

Guo: Tell it to others.

Ma: Opera! Hmm.

Guo: What play?

Ma: Sister Liu.

Guo: Oh, Sister Liu.

M: I haven't seen it. Let's have a look. That's great.

Guo: Oh.

Ma: The accent is beautiful. There is a passage I like best. That's it, that, that, Xiao Wang. Are you all right now?

Guo: What are you doing?

M: Ah, you hold the phone. Please pay attention to my study for you.

Guo: Learn? !

Hey, wait a minute.

Guo: Hey.

Ma: Xiao Wang, I'm learning.

Guo: All right, you do it.

Ma: singing folk songs ~ singing here, singing Hongshan songs over there like spring water ~ not afraid of beach risks and many bends ~ hey, Xiao Wang, what do you think of my expression?

Guo: What do I think?

Oh, by the way, what? what did you say ? /Excuse me? I didn't hear them clapping.

Guo: Hello! Just forget it．

M: Haven't you eaten yet?

Guo: Oh.

M: Oh, let me prepare it for you.

Guo: How to prepare?

M: I'll buy twelve cookies, I'll eat four, and I'll give you the remaining eight.

Guo: Hehe, she takes good care of her.

M: Huh? Don't know him? Chang 'an Grand Theater! Just come out of your house and take a bus all the way.

Guo: Hmm.

M: Ticket price 10 cent, three stops. You can sit on the bus if there are seats, and you can stand if there are many people!

Guo: It's all rubbish!

M: Mm-hmm. When you get off, look across the street.

Guo: Hmm.

M: I'll wait for you at the third telephone pole in the west.

Guo: Oh.

M: OK? It starts at a quarter past seven. Hmm. I will wait for you at seven o'clock. Seven o'clock! Get there on time!

Guo: Hmm.

M: Seven o'clock! We are ... Hey, Xiao Wang, don't come!

Guo: Why don't you come?

M: It's already half past eight!

Guo: hi ~!

Interviewee: 568848584- New to Jianghu Level 2 3-28 12:26

Cure a cold, private Qi Zhi.

B: Here we are! Let me introduce myself. I am a famous doctor here. Why am I so famous? Because I am different from other doctors, I think most of my patients. To see my patient come in and climb out. (Wait for the audience to finish laughing) Oh, no, climb in and come out. Let's start seeing a doctor. Call one in. (Look at the list). Number one, surnamed Bai, cataract. Number two, surnamed Wei, has stomach bleeding. Number three, surnamed Niu, cowhide moss. Come on, you three, go in first.

Doctor, I ... I ... ...

B: What's your date?

A: I'm fourth.

B: The next batch.

Next ... Hey, why do you think I'm so unlucky? No matter what I do, it's the next batch. A while ago, our unit promoted a cadre, and I came to be the "next batch". I will retire in the next batch. Let me introduce myself. My surname is Shan, which is a word. I put the word "good" in hundreds of surnames. My name is Sam Guo Rui, and I'm not feeling well these two days. I may have caught a cold. I came to see a famous doctor. It is said that this doctor is particularly responsible for his patients. It's time to call my number next time. ...

B: Next ... (A snuggles on B's shoulder, B takes a step, A follows) You look ill.

You can't come here unless you are ill.

B: Next, breathe with one mouth.

A: (Look around) Who means breathing with one mouth?

B: What uneducated parents have such an ugly name! ?

A: There's only one breath left. Look at that.

You haven't promised ... you haven't promised me to get off work yet!

Hey, what about me, doctor?

Oh, here's another one. What's your date?

A: No.4, you said my next batch. ...

You only breathe with one mouth!

My name is Sam Guo Rui! Take a closer look!

Oh, yes, Sam Guo Rui.

A: What look! Mountain Guo Rui thinks this is one-sided breathing.

Mountain Guo Rui! Is it uncomfortable there?

I just have a cough and asthma.

Not yet. A mouthful of asthma.

A: Doctor, I heard that the conditions here are particularly good. (glance left and right) Why is there nothing?

B: A mouthful of asthma. (A: Shan Guo Rui. ) Oh, yes, Sam Guo Rui. What do you think is wrong with you?

I think so ... you don't have to guess. I think I have a cold.

You are very clever! You say a cold is a cold, so what else should I do? You are looking for a famous doctor now. Anyone who comes to see my famous doctor should check it again.

Doctor, check it.

B: Don't move. Open your mouth. (1) A little higher. (Pitch up) (Repeat twice) A little higher.

A: Doctor, you are not a hospital, but a conservatory of music.

What nonsense!

I can sing so high!

Who told you to sing high? I told you to keep your chin up a little. I can't see.

A: Be more specific.

B: Come on.

A: Ah ~ ~

No wonder your voice is so ugly! There's a little bit on it. This ceiling is a little moldy.

A: Doctor, it is true that you are not a conservatory of music here. You are an interior decorator.

B: You said it twice!

A: Then why do you think I have a ceiling?

B: The person who comes here to see a doctor is called the ceiling. A: Maxillary, doctor. ) Oh, yes, the palate. When I was a doctor, I didn't know it was called maxilla. But I heard it was the ceiling. ) I said maxilla, in case you don't understand. I know what your education level is!

A: No matter how low my education is, I won't leave here.

Come on, come on, stick out your tongue. There's moss on it! Does it usually leak?

Oh, it usually rains heavily outside, so it rains lightly here. I thought, my brain?

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Wonderful crosstalk dialogue

Reward score: 0- settlement time: April 8, 2008 at 20: 32.

Who has the artistic charm of language: 1, crosstalk, storytelling or wonderful dialogue in film and television dramas; 2. Xiehouyu; 3. Proverbs; 4. Humorous stories; 5, ancient and modern jokes; 6 advertising words.

Questioner: purple ghost gem-a scholar's second best answer

"Grandpa, how can I go to America?" "Then who knows ... ask the village chief!"

Speak louder and you won't need electricity!

Don't leave after the party, go to eat-whoever goes pays.

4 cross talk is good! Carry forward the truth, goodness and beauty, and make Huoxiang upright.

There are more than 1000 traditional cross talks left by the old man. After years of continuous efforts by our actors, there are now more than 400 pieces left.

Listening to cross talk more shows that you are patriotic. There is a child near our home who can speak seven or eight foreign languages, such as English, Japanese, Korean, Yugoslav, North Slavic and West Slavic ... Can he sit with Eight-Nation Alliance and scold him anyway? Tell him you listen to cross talk. "Don't go! I don't understand! " Ignoring the law, I would have killed him! I can't understand cross talk in foreign languages!

The house where I live is full of holes. It is fatal when it rains: it rains outside the rain house, and it rains outside the rain house. Sometimes it rains too hard, so the whole family takes shelter in the streets.

If you are willing to die, I am willing to bury it.

Whether you want to listen, whether you want to listen, whether you want to listen, I will never insist.

10 This guy robbed the bank and drove up the North Third Ring Road. 5: 30 in the afternoon! When the police arrived, the traffic jam was very serious.

1 1 Your shameless appearance is like my charm.

12? You don't know me? I am an artist! I have been an artist for over a week.

13: Brother, I hope the world will be peaceful, the people of the world will live and work in peace and contentment, and there will be no war, ok?

God thought about it. Let's tell the truth about this difficulty. I'm not that capable. Really, really, I won't tell you anything else. Can you change it? Let's discuss something else.

When I touch my body, I bring other people's photos. Brother, look at this. This is my other disciples. They look cold and can't find anyone. Please make him beautiful.

God: (thinking) Let's talk about world peace (tearing up photos).

Degang Guo: Hey, why did you tear up the photo, huh? I don't agree. I don't agree. Why tear it? I still keep it to ward off evil spirits!

14 has money at home and drives a Cadillac 13. You can tell by the sound that it is a good machine, imported from Germany, "chug chug", oh, triple jump.

At first, half of Beijing was smoking black smoke, and the traffic police shouted at you, "Elder Sun, take your magic."

15 From now on, I will never eat lobster again.

16 grenades are expensive. If there are six grenades for one dollar, I'll throw you a hundred dollars first.

The young man looks like an actor. ...

18! This plane, like Dafa, has a rocking glass! ..... sitting on a big hat, Li Xia didn't give the newspaper ... Tianjin didn't make a big hat, but they all went to the United States ... and flew to the United States for half a year, adding more than 40,000 oil.

19 Guo: What should I do? I'm so rich. I don't know how to spend it Hey? ! Yu Qian, why don't I take care of you?

Will you take care of me? !

Guo: Ah ... no ... No matter how rich we are, we must choose our looks!

Shouxing:: Jade Emperor Jade Emperor! ~ something has come up.

Jade Emperor: What happened to the birthday girl?

Shouxing: Do you have a hammer and nails? Let me use it. My sika deer bit the railing.

Jade Emperor: Shouxing, what did I tell you? It doesn't matter if you ride that deer, you have to feed it! ~

2 1 Degang Guo: I found a good job as soon as I arrived here, building a chimney of more than 70 meters!

Yu Qian: Not bad!

Degang Guo: Get up early and get the job done. People come to check and accept, but they won't give us money anyway!

Yu Qian: Is the quality not good?

Degang Guo: I started to turn the drawings upside down, and people asked me to repair the well!

Guo: Hey ~ ~! There was an opportunity to make money before me, but I didn't cherish it. The opportunity passed and I regretted it. If God gives me another chance, I want to say to the village chief: I am willing to go. If I have to put a limit on that salary, I hope it is: 400 yuan.

It's been cold for 23 days. I'll give you a coat. The post office said it was too heavy, so I hinged the button and put it in my pocket.

Twenty people, men and women, are standing in front of the White House, and their bags are all ready ―― reporters! I have to be careful what I say. I don't want to be caught by them and embarrass China people. Next, the gang came over: "Master, would you like a plate?" Sell! What do you think the White House Cultural Bureau does for food?

25- Wen Shun, what have you found?

-My mother brought eggs.

-Give it to me.

-No ... guess, guess how many.

-I guess you gave me one.

-If you can guess, I'll give you two.

Five?

This is a false tooth.

-Throw it away.

-Don't throw it away. It's too bad.

-Why?

-Tie a stick to it as a tickler.

The story told today is not far from now. If there are old people at home, you can go back and ask-during the Spring and Autumn Period and the Warring States Period ... "

Flight 28 90 14, Xizhimen to Daxing Huangcun, fare 5 yuan, please board. How interesting you say this is. The flight attendants will shout when they stand there. Let's go, let's go. There are big seats, there are big seats. Be sure to have a big seat!

When so-and-so was born, his father was ill, and after returning home, his mother was the hardest. Here is the husband and there are the children. We should take care of them. Feed the medicine here, feed the medicine there, feed the milk, feed the medicine. Feed medicine, breast-feed His father is too strong, and the child has taken the wrong medicine.

30 withered vines and old trees faint crows, small bridges and flowing water. The old road is thin, the sun sets, heartbroken people ... in the hospital, ... don't go to the hospital if their intestines are broken! ..... I am the first master of tampering with Tang poetry and Song poetry.

3 1 law-abiding, facing the court, worried, singing at night, riding a mule to harm others, being honest and clean, starving. Building bridges and roads is blind, killing and setting fires. I went to the Western Heaven to ask my Buddha, and the Buddha said, No way!

32 "The foot of my bed is shining with such bright light. Is it frosty already?"? , looked up and found it was moonlight, (pa! My name is Degang Guo. There are many people here. I am very happy. Thank you for coming. Don't go after the party. Go and eat. Whoever goes will pay. Listen to cross talk for twenty, and make a noise of sixteen thousand. Laugh and add money. "

We fell in love with cross talk on TV. Why? Say it! The director arranged applause. Once on stage,' Today', wow-,'We', wow-,'For everyone', wow-,'Say a photo', wow-,'Sound', wow-,(Cheerful: a word and a drum! )' bad', wow-clap if it's bad! ?

Yu Qian: A tooth is still stuffed.

Degang Guo: He ate the lotus root and got it in his eye!

Yu Qian: Hi ~ ~

I am a rich man. Today, backstage, I drove here and they all came on foot. Those old gentlemen in Tianjin went out on Tuesday. But my car has had some problems recently, and the speed is a bit slow. At first, I thought the carburetor was dirty. I won't know until I check. It was the pedal that fell off ... "

36 "Then anyone can eat it. Everyone looks like pancakes all day. It is also ok to roll steamed bread with rice. It's made of porcelain. Sometimes when I come backstage, I slip two pounds of cake to drink ... "

Alas, there is something wrong with your mouth.

38 hooligans know martial arts, and they can't stop it! Scientists know martial arts, and no one can stop them!

39 killed me!

How can I describe his appearance to you? Have you ever seen baked sweet potatoes? Just baked. It's too hot in your hand. I accidentally failed to hold it and fell to the ground. What about over there? A child came running, wearing spikes, and stepped on this sweet potato. . His face is like this sweet potato.

4 1 I want to fight against the three levels.

You are vulgar-but I like it.

43. "If you refuse to smash vegetables, stop it, your grandson!"

Scold the street and slap you!

On this day, I came to the railway station with prejudice, and all the tickets were sold out. Bias went to ask a policeman, "Do you know where the conductor is?" The policeman listened to the music: "I'm still looking!" " "

I'm going to kill myself and jump off a building. I have studied this kind of jump. The second floor is different from the twentieth floor. The second floor is "pa" and "ah", and the twentieth floor is "ah ~ ~ ~" and "pa".

Hearing the news of your father's death, the neighbors cried: "such a good man, he died late!" "

47. After midnight, two gentlemen took to the street naked, so Jing Li still wears glasses-if you put on a mask again, it will be three points.

48. How beautiful these two nurses are: 1.7 meters tall, with sideburns and whiskers, and a wide palm to protect their hearts.

49. Yu Qian's father-father Wang.

50. Li Jing has a cousin who can tiptoe under Li Xia in high heels. She looks poor. Her photo was posted on the door to ward off evil spirits and on the bed.