Tonight’s post-80s talk show classic jokes

1. Zi Jian: Wife, what’s going on today? I’m so unhappy!

Wife: I’m wearing a different shirt.

Zi Jian: Don’t you usually care less about this?

Wife: You don’t know, it’s okay to wear matching clothes with others! I match up with the IKEA sofa! The color of the clothes I'm wearing today is exactly the same as the IKEA sofa!

Zi Jian: You don’t care about people, so what do you care about the sofa?

Wife: You don’t know, I matched up with the IKEA sofa, and a young man, bang! Just sit on me!

2. My wife always asks me: Husband, why are there always a few clothes in our wardrobe?

Yes: you always buy skirts.

3. The scene when I got married was like this: The emcee asked: From now on, no matter whether I have a cold, a stomachache, or don’t want to play with you or watch football with you, will you marry her? I really thought about it for five minutes.

Then ask: Wang Zijian, when you are poor, have no house and no job, are you willing to let her live? This guy is her ex-boyfriend.

4. The goddess said: I have level 10 piano, level 6 clarinet, and level 8 English. What are your specialties? Wang Jianguo thought for a long time: I am over level 60 in World of Warcraft.

5. The two Han horses at the door are yours!

Yes!

Don’t you usually drive one? Why get two more! ?

Cough! Who is driving this car? I usually use this as a stone lion!

6. Every time the subway opens, a few people fall out. I decided to bring a pot of cactus to work, and when I got off the subway, I saw it was aloe vera.