Who says boys and girls are all the same? It's just different!

Stand at the gate of the community at night and wait for someone.

A strange aunt passed by and suddenly stopped to ask, "Is it going to be born soon?"

Looking at the bulging bag on his stomach, he smiled and replied, "Well, it's been almost a month."

Aunt looked at the big bag again and asked, "Is it a boy?"

One leng, replied: "I don't know, I didn't check."

Aunt nodded, leaving a sentence for sure, "It must be a boy, and this stomach is so sharp." Then she left me with a dull face.

This scene has appeared more than a few times after she became pregnant. Colleagues, friends, uncles and aunts in the community will always discuss whether it is a boy or a girl when they see me. In most cases, I don't know whether it is based on "experience" or "scientific research", or just because most people like boys' social etiquette, most people come to the conclusion that "the baby must be a boy".

If you want to say, "Aren't all boys and girls the same? What are you doing with so much? " Then you are wrong, there are many people struggling.

In my parents' time, most families liked boys for two main reasons: First, China's traditional thought that only men can carry on the family line; Second, in those days, men meant productivity, while women were often extra rations at home, so there was a saying of "losing money". I don't know if this concept of "having a boy is a glorious ancestor" is particularly prominent in other places, but in my hometown-Minnan town, this concept is still deeply rooted even today.

My mother is a "disappointing" woman in the eyes of the neighbors in the street, because the three girls who jumped out of her mother's stomach were all baby girls. According to my mother, when I was a child, everyone lived in a small courtyard next to every household, not the current commercial housing. Because my father works outside all the year round, there are only her and three starving daughters at home, so I am often bullied, and my neighbor's aunt even throws water into my yard. Perhaps it was the "inferiority complex" buried at that time, or perhaps it was out of a strong maternal love. Today, my mother's personality still has a strong tendency to be reasonable and overshadow others, for fear of being looked down upon a little bit by others.

In fact, it is not only the neighborhood on the street that treats women who can only have girls differently, but even the father who loved his three daughters from childhood to the bone has lost. According to my aunt, when I was about to give birth, as an old man, everyone thought it would be a boy this time. My father, who is far away in Shenzhen, is also happily rushing home with big bags of supplements, preparing for the birth of the "Golden Knot" and planning to put it on a big table to celebrate. But as a result, I am still a person with no handle, and once again let my relatives and friends see the joke. Not long after I was born, my father angrily returned to Shenzhen. Although it sounds a little cold in my heart, my father's love for me has really existed for more than 20 years. This is only a human concept, and it is also a very helpless thing. Buried in a pool of blood, blameless.

Perhaps it is the sense of crisis caused by many children at home. I have learned to read people's faces since I was a child, and I am clever and sensible. Most of my uncles and aunts are partial to me, except my grandmother. Actually, it's not that grandma doesn't like me. To be precise, grandma doesn't like all female grandchildren except male grandchildren. Grandma has four children, two men and two women, eight female grandchildren and two Gymboree male grandchildren. As long as I can remember, no matter how kind my sisters and I were to my grandmother, she always kept a straight face. Every time I leave something delicious for her, she silently puts it away for Gymboree, no matter how much her Gymboree dislikes her. After several times, we gradually lost some enthusiasm for grandma.

I can never accept such a view. Growing up, I was taught that "boys and girls are all the same" and "who said that women are not as good as men". In school and at work, women are not weaker than men. Why are boys "better" than girls? What is even more incomprehensible is that so many women want to embarrass themselves and look down on their gender groups.

Today, our generation has grown up, and it is time to have children and raise the next generation. My sisters are very competitive, and they are all boys. My mother is very cute. She named one of her two grandchildren "Gao Gao" and the other "Wisdom Fofo Agbo", hoping to add another grandson, who could be called "Shuai Shuai" to complement the laudatory name of "Gao Fushuai". Dad doesn't talk, but every time I say I want to have a girl, he looks unhappy. It is said that children look at pregnant women's stomachs most accurately. My family always likes to show my big nephew my stomach and ask, "Is it my brother or sister?" Children always like to say sister for some reason. One day, when I came home from work, I heard from my second sister that my father even argued with him all afternoon about it and wanted him to be renamed my brother. It was ridiculous.

Even after more than 20 years, in my hometown of Minnan, the concept of "having a boy is better than having a girl" has not changed much. Parents eagerly look forward to the arrival of the next male grandson, and even threatened to take another boy back to southern Fujian. Three red eggs were laid at home, which also made them proud. This made the child's father happy, as if his male status had risen instantly.

In fact, after arriving in Shanghai, I found that Shanghainese and Minnan people are different, and there is another steelyard for boys or girls.

The local people in Shanghai around them don't have the obsession of "boys are above everything else" of Minnan people, but they are more realistic. If it really boils down to boys or girls, they may prefer girls. The reason is simple: boys are "construction banks", and giving birth to boys means giving them a suite to marry. What kind of economic pressure is this in Shanghai, a city with soaring housing prices? But having a girl is different. It's China Merchants Bank, and it's a business that attracts investment and makes a steady profit. According to my friend who grew up in Shanghai, some parents in Shanghai just "make their daughters beautiful" without any savings, and then look forward to their daughter marrying into a rich family, as if this were her main business in life.

This idea seems more acceptable to me. What's wrong with seeking truth from facts instead of stubbornly sticking to the puzzling idea of carrying on the family line?

Nowadays, among peers, the evaluation criteria for giving birth to boys or girls are different. Most female friends around me hope to have a beautiful and caring baby girl, while men seem to prefer boys. This internal reason is quite different from the thinking of the previous generation.

The reason why expectant mothers want to be girls is simple: girls are caring, they can dress up beautifully, they can wear sister clothes with their mothers, they can raise girls like little princesses, and they can give their daughters all the "princess treatment" that they didn't enjoy in childhood. I can also teach my daughter my love experience, so that she can be invincible in the battlefield of love and marriage, and let more men fall at the feet of the princess. Boys are always naughty. When I was a child, I was dirty and didn't know how to raise it. Hide if you can. Some colleagues even said that after his daughter-in-law was found to be a boy, she sat directly at the door of the B-ultrasound room and cried. ......

Fathers-to-be also have a good reason to want boys: after all the troubles, boys are all right, so they are relieved and don't have to worry about it, which is easier. A girl is different. As a man, she knows that it is cheating for men to pick up girls, and she will be fine if she picks up girls. What should I do if my daughter is taken away by the bad guys? If the daughter doesn't come home at night, the fathers may fidget before the mother jumps up.

A male colleague who is a "winner in life" with twins heard that I was pregnant with a girl abnormally and tried to persuade me to "fuck off", citing such an example:

Once I teased my daughter and teased her. I didn't know where it was heavy and where it hurt. Suddenly, my daughter was unhappy and went to her mother with a flat mouth to complain, which made him confused in the wind. Little boys don't do this. No matter how he gropes, how to educate him, even if he is unhappy at that time, it will be fine after a while. To sum up, it is two words-worry!

Then, this colleague also made a vivid metaphor: having a daughter is like cultivating a beautiful flower with hard work. Later, people came to the end with flowers.

As soon as I thought, it was not right, so I replied, Didn't that boy plant a tree like himself, and eventually he grew into a towering tree, so that he could enjoy the cool and be uprooted? ......

Isn't that what it is? Nowadays, the status of women in the family is rising day by day. How many husbands don't listen to their wives? In some families, the status of mother-in-law will soon far exceed that of mother-in-law.

For boys and girls, men have men's concerns and women have women's considerations. The era of "having a boy is king" or "having a girl is making money" has long passed.

Although every time I tell my father that not everyone likes having boys, he always stubbornly doesn't believe it.

In less than a month, the day of unloading will come. After another week or two of work, I will also go back to other places and concentrate on going home to give birth.

Laugh with colleagues: When giving birth to a child, if it is a girl, I must laugh three times in the circle of friends, and then post a photo of my daughter on PO, which proves that not all pointed bellies are boys, and miracles will still happen.

Colleague asked: What if it is a boy?

Putting away my smile, I replied: Then I will disappear from my circle of friends. ......

It's really different to have boys and girls, although I can only accept the result happily.

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