Should other adults be prevented from "teasing" their children?

Other adults must be prevented from "teasing" their children.

Why do adults tease children?

I think it is usually for two reasons:

1. Fun

Adults think it is fun to tease children, and they want to joke with them.

2. Do not regard the child as a "person"

In their eyes, the child is more like a little pet than a person, so they do not regard the child as a "person" "To respect, it is just an object for them to tease and play with.

There are several common ways of teasing:

1. Teasing

A typical example is: If you call me daddy, I will give you candy. This approach kills two birds with one stone, teasing both the child and the mother. Some adult men like to use this method to satisfy their cravings.

2. You picked it up from the garbage dump

When I was a child, people in the village, including my parents, liked to use this method when they couldn't answer my origin.

3. After your mother gave birth to a little brother and sister, she didn’t like you anymore.

Possible consequences:

1. Cause confusion to children

Children do not yet understand what is true and what is a joke.

Sun Ruixue, the first person in Montessori education in China, once told such a story. When her child was young, a male friend teased him, calling me daddy and giving you sweets. The child calls him daddy.

Later, another friend came to play at home and also brought food for the child. The child immediately called the friend "Dad", which frightened the friend.

The child thinks that anyone who gives him something to eat can be called "Dad".

2. Insecurity

The adults thought it was a joke, but the children took it seriously.

When I was a child, people in the village often joked about my birth: You were acquired by your father from someone’s family across the village.

I still remember that for a while I wondered: Am I the biological child of my parents?

Once a child falls into these questions: Am I the biological child of my parents? Do mom and dad love me? There will be no sense of security.

A secure child will explore the world and develop intelligence.

A child who has no sense of security spends all his energy looking for a sense of security. He will use various naughty and outrageous ways to attract parents' attention and prove that he is loved.

For the sake of our children, we must say no even if it offends others.

I am Cheng Xiaohui, and I hope to accompany you on your parenting journey. Public account: Xiaohui talks about parenting