Write some humorous jokes ~ ~ ~ Not too long, but healthy ~ ~ ~

One day, Xiaoming was walking on the road. I suddenly feel sore when I walk! Why is this happening? - ! ! Because Xiaoming stepped on a lemon! !

1. Xiaoming was thrown from 13 floor ... why is there nothing ...

2. During the ten years of Anti-Japanese War, Xiao Ming was hungry ... He made jiaozi with human flesh for breakfast ... At school ... He opened the lunch box and found that ... jiaozi was missing two ... He closed the door ... and then opened it again, missing two. .........

So .. Finally, jiaozi disappeared ... Xiaoming was afraid. ...

Excuse me, where is jiaozi? .....

During ten years in War of Resistance against Japanese Aggression ... Wang Xiaoming lived a carefree life ... Why?

4. Wang Xiaoming was thrown from 13 floor ... why is it okay?

5. Wang Xiaoming was thrown from the 13 floor again ... why?

6. An adventurer took Xiaoming to the desert .. Why did he come back safely?

7. Later, the adventurer took Xiaoming to the desert ... Why didn't he go back this time?

Answer:

1. Because Xiaoming is a lunch box. ..

2. jiaozi sticks to the lid of the lunch box. ......

3. Because Wang Xiaoming is a lunch box .....

4. Because Wang Xiaoming is Xiaoming .....

5. Because there is no14th floor. .....

6. Because Xiaoming is a camel .....

7. Because Xiao Ming was thrown from 13 floor and died. .....

Xiaoming cut his hair and came to school the next day. The students all laughed when they saw his new hairstyle: Xiao Ming, your head is a kite! Xiao Ming felt very wronged and ran outside to cry. Crying and crying ~ he flew away ...

In the music class, the teacher played a Beethoven tune.

Xiaoming asked Xiaohua, "Do you know music?"

Xiaohua: "Yes"

Xiaoming: "Do you know what the teacher is playing?"

Xiaohua: "Piano."

Ming Dow Jr.: "Kang, let me ask you something." A shark ate a mung bean. What did it become? Kang said, "I don't know. What is the answer? Xiao Ming said, "Hey! Hey! The answer is "green bean paste (mung bean shark)", you idiot! 」

The teacher asked Xiaoming questions in class, but Xiaoming stood up without saying a word.

Teacher: Xiaoming?

Teacher: Xiaoming

Teacher: Xiaoming! What's the matter with you? Do you know the answer or not? At least let me know!

Xiao Ming: Zhi ~

Xiaoming lost a leg in a car accident.

Xiaoming lost another leg in a car accident.

Xiaoming lost his other leg in another car accident.

Xiaoming lost another leg in a car accident.

In fact, Xiaoming is a dog.

When Xiaoming came home, the dog next door suddenly ran out and bit him. In a rage, he picked up bamboo and smashed it.

When the owner of the dog saw Xiao Ming beating the dog, he said unhappily that beating the dog depends on the owner. Haven't you heard of it?

At this moment, Xiao Ming said: Good! I will watch your dog while hitting you.

Xiaoming owed 200,000 yuan to the underground bank, and he begged him to stay a few more days.

The person in the bank said: Be sure to return it tomorrow, otherwise ... chop off two fingers;

The day after tomorrow ... chop 4; the third day ...

Xiaoming: Do I need to return it?

Banker: No, you will become Tinker Bell.

One day, the teacher took a group of children to the mountain to pick fruit.

He announced: "children, after picking the fruit, we can wash it together, and we can eat it together after washing."

All the children went to pick fruit.

As soon as the assembly time came, all the children got together.

Teacher: "Xiaohua, what do you have?"

Xiaohua: "I am washing apples because I picked them."

Teacher: "What about you, Xiaomei?"

Xiaomei: "I'm washing tomatoes because I picked tomatoes."

Teacher: "The children are great! What about Amin? "

Xiaoming: "I'm washing cloth shoes because I stepped on shit."

Xiaoming's family has three sons. The eldest is Daming, the second is Erming, and the third is what?

Answer: The third child's name is Sanming (or something else).

If he asks, what about Xiao Ming? A: Xiao Ming is a daughter! !

Xiao Ming returned to the classroom after going to the toilet and said to the teacher:

There are many ants in the toilet.

The teacher suddenly thought of the English word ant for ants, so he tested Xiaoming: What did the ants say?

Xiao a face of vacant ... Said:

Ant, he said nothing.

The teacher asked Xiaoming questions in class, but Xiaoming stood up without saying a word.

Teacher: Xiaoming?

Teacher: Xiaoming

Teacher: Xiaoming! What's the matter with you? Do you know the answer or not? At least let me know!

Xiao Ming: Zhi ~

Xiaoming: What's the temperature today?

Xiaohua: 3 degrees below zero!

Xiaoming: No wonder it's so cold.

The science teacher asked: Why is the body cold after death?

No one answered.

The teacher asked again: Does nobody know?

At this time, Xiao Ming stood up and said, That's because he is calm and naturally gets cold.

Xiao Qiang: What do African cannibals eat?

Xiaoming: People!

Xiao Qiang: Then one day, the chief was ill and the doctor told him to be a vegetarian. What did he eat?

Xiaoming: A vegetable eater!

Xiao Ming skipped to the bakery and asked, "Boss, do you have a hundred steamed buns?"

Boss: "Oh, sorry, not that much." "I see. . . "

Xiao Ming left in frustration.

The next day, Xiaoming skipped to the bakery. "Boss, are there a hundred buns?"

Boss: "Sorry, I still don't have it." "I see. . . "

Xiao Ming left in frustration again.

On the third day, Xiaoming skipped to the bakery. "Boss, are there a hundred buns?"

The boss said happily, "Yes, yes, we have a hundred buns today! ! "

Xiao Ming took out his money: "Great, I want two!" " "

The ants went to the desert. Why didn't he leave footprints on the beach, but only a line?

Xiaoming: Because it rides a bike!

The ant came home from the desert. He didn't inform anyone, but his family knew he was back! Why ah!

Xiaoming: I saw his bike parked downstairs.

Xiaoming: What is that man doing?

Xiao Fang: He is shaking.

Xiao Ming: Why is he trembling?

Xiao Fang: He is cold.

Xiao Ming: Oh, shivering doesn't lead to cold drawing.

Xiao Fang: ...

Xiao Qiang: Two people fell into a trap. The dead call the dead, what is the name of the living?

Xiaoming: Call for help!

Xiaoming: I used to suffer from schizophrenia, and now we have all recovered.

Once, Xiao Ming jumped off a building.

Xiaoming jumped from the tenth floor to the ninth floor.

Xiaoming jumped from the ninth floor to the eighth floor.

Xiaoming jumped from the eighth floor to the seventh floor.

Xiaoming jumped from the seventh floor to the sixth floor.

Xiaoming jumped from the sixth floor to the fifth floor.

Xiaoming jumped from the fifth floor to the fourth floor.

Xiaoming jumped from the fourth floor to the third floor.

Xiaoming jumped from the third floor to the second floor.

Xiaoming jumped from the second floor to the first floor.

Xiaoming jumped off the building and went home for dinner.