What is the funniest joke in the world?

The soldier asked the company commander: What should I do if I step on a mine in the battle? The company commander was greatly annoyed: Shit, what can I do? Pay the price for stepping on it.

A fashionable woman dyed her hair in color. One day she went to the market to buy food, and her shoelaces were loose, so she bowed her head and tied them. An old lady with bad eyes touched a woman's head and said loudly, boss, how much is this mop?

A drunk accidentally fell from the third floor, attracting passers-by to watch. Police come over: What's the matter? Drunk: I don't know. I just arrived.

Once when everyone was playing mahjong, the power went out, so they lit candles and continued to play. Later, someone was too hot and shouted, "Hey! Turn on the electric fan! " Everyone advised, "No, no, the candle will be blown out."

The zipper opened when the teacher was giving a lecture, and he didn't notice it himself. A girl saw it and stood up to remind: teacher, you didn't close the door! The teacher waved his hand: Never mind, the dean will come to visit in a moment. ...

Buy oranges, boss: 1.5 1 kg. Me: It's too expensive, five yuan and three Jin. Boss: no, no.