Break tea with cold water and slowly thicken it - waiting is also an educational method

Since the tea ceremony, it has been customary to use hot water to make tea. Make tea with hot water, the fragrance of the tea is dense and diffuse, and you will be intoxicated before you drink it. Maybe people think that only hot water can bring out the flavor and active ingredients of tea. Facts have proved that the effect of brewing tea in cold water is not bad. As long as you have enough patience and are not impatient, the fragrance of the tea will slowly seep out. Brewing tea in cold water can effectively retain the active ingredients in the tea leaves, which is good for the body. The human body is more beneficial, we just need to be patient.

If you have expectations in your heart, there will be a reason worth waiting for. And in this seemingly long waiting process, there is often a special feeling that nourishes the heart, and the same is true for education.

Having been teaching for more than 20 years, I found that every school year, every class will have one or two students with learning difficulties with different manifestations, and expecting them to make progress requires a long waiting process——

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? 1. The story of the "Lone Ranger" emerging from the cocoon?

Xiaoqin was my student in the 2008 academic year. He didn't like studying and often didn't complete his homework. He almost didn't finish his homework. He was late every day, and his classmates and teachers kindly asked him for help with homework, but he found opportunities to sneak away. Because of this, the classmates in the class are not willing to play with him, and he seems to be quite happy that no one will talk to him, and he can enjoy his own world as if nothing has happened.

This makes me anxious in my eyes and in my heart. From a psychological point of view, normal children like to interact with peers and value friendship. If a child has no interest in making friends and likes to be alone, it is largely due to inferiority complex, which is very harmful to the child's growth. unfavorable. As for Xiaoqin, because it is difficult for him to have a chance to express himself in the class, he is always ranked last or second in every exam. It is natural for him to have low self-esteem. What's even more frightening is that his inferiority complex has been numbed to its natural state.

Aware of this, I intentionally let him find opportunities to express himself during classroom teaching. But I found that he lacked the proper self-confidence and was always afraid of making a fool of himself by making mistakes in his presentation. Sometimes he was afraid or unwilling to say even if he had a sure answer. As the saying goes: Haste makes waste. In opening the channel to his soul, I knew I couldn't rush it and decided to take a step-by-step approach: I would give enthusiastic and positive encouragement and praise to students who took the initiative to raise their hands to answer questions in class, regardless of whether they were right or wrong, and then carefully observe the students. Wait for a period of time, and on the premise of making sure that he has the initiative to express his desire, find ways to create a natural and confident opportunity for him to express himself.

Hard work paid off, and the opportunity finally came: That day, I deliberately asked a very simple question. When Xiaoqin heard it, he blinked rapidly, looked at me expectantly, and immediately lowered his head. But my little hands were scratching everywhere at a loss, and my little butt was on pins and needles. I wanted to stand up and sit down several times, and I sat down and wanted to stand up again. I was delighted: it seemed that he wanted to show off himself this time, but he didn't dare to take the initiative because of face or fear of failure. Don't miss this opportunity, it will never come again. So, facing Lin Li's little hand, I raised my voice: "This question, the teacher will ask the students who listen most carefully in this class to answer it. Only the students who listen carefully in this class can answer it correctly. In this class, the students who listen most carefully can answer it correctly." Who is my classmate? It's Xiaoqin!" When he heard what I said, his eyes suddenly lit up, and then he stood up timidly and answered the question in a low voice. I encouraged him: "Your answer is very correct. Can you speak louder so that all the classmates can hear it? Classmates, please give me a round of applause!" After the applause, Xiaoqin said the answer loudly again, and the whole class rang again. received more warm applause, this time it was praise, applause from the heart of the students, Xiaoqin showed a confident and proud smile on his face. ?

After that, he was finally able to take the initiative and boldly show himself in the Chinese class. Occasionally, he could also accurately tell the answer when the students with better Chinese scores couldn't answer it, which was surprising. I also shared this harvest with other teachers in other subjects. In addition to Chinese classes, teachers can also receive surprises from Xiaoqin from time to time.

Writing this, I suddenly remembered an article I once saw in a book. It is said that more than 30 years ago, a strange lawsuit occurred in Nevada, USA.

A mother took her 3-year-old daughter to court because she knew the letter "O". The reason was that the kindergarten deprived her daughter of her imagination. Her daughter was able to think of "O" before she knew it. "O" means round things such as apples, suns, footballs, and bird eggs. She has lost this ability since she was taught to read 26 letters in kindergarten. The mother demanded that the kindergarten be responsible for the consequences and compensate her daughter for her disability. The lawsuit caused an uproar. Some thought the mother was crazy, while others thought it was a fuss over a molehill and a waste of energy. But this mother was persistent and strong, and she did not hesitate to bankrupt her family. The result was unexpected, and the kindergarten ended up losing the case.

Under the mother's patient waiting and guidance, the child let his imagination run wild, so the simple "O" can take on thousands of forms.

Although there is still a certain gap between Chinese and Western education, we also have different opinions on Western education. But I was still deeply moved by that mother's extraordinary love for her child, her cherishing of her child's potential, her praise of her child's imagination, her high concern for her child's future, and her patient companionship with her child.

2. "The whole class is my enemy"

In the fall of 2009, not long after the new teacher took over, I strangely discovered that Xiaobang was the protagonist in almost every minor dispute. , and every time there was a dispute, he felt that he had no problem and it was everyone else's fault.

After a home visit, I learned that although this child is tall and strong, he is not very old and handles things a bit naively. In addition, his parents are busy and neglect to enlighten and supervise, so that he develops Procrastination, lying, irritability, poor hygiene and many other bad habits. At the same time, the child's father has a bad temper, and the only method of disciplining his child is spanking. Once the child makes any mistake, he always feels that all the responsibility lies with the teacher and classmates. Under the guidance of words and deeds, the child thinks that everything big and small is the fault of others, and never feels that You need to take responsibility yourself. At first, my parents didn't think there was anything wrong. After they entered senior grade, they became worried when they saw that their children had few friends with whom they often interacted, rarely mentioned their classmates, and were always less pretentious and modest when getting along with their younger siblings. Get up, but don’t know how to help the child.

After learning this, I didn’t pay too much attention to it. After so many years, I would encounter naughty children every year, even junior high school students who clamored to find someone to beat them up and become teachers. In the end, I didn’t Everything was resolved peacefully. Did you graduate successfully? As for this child, just talk more and guide him more.

Unexpectedly, Xiaobang was really capable of causing trouble: One day, when he was changing seats and moving study supplies, he got into a fight with his classmates over a disagreement over their language. It only took me 5 or 6 seconds from discovering the situation to their seats, but he had already completed the full set of actions using his hands and feet. Of course, the opponent is not easy to bully either - he is also tall, strong and quick to attack. Therefore, both of them burst into tears. However, every classmate saw that Xiao Bang was particularly ruthless and used all his strength in every move, so all the accusations were directed at Xiao Bang.

Around the corner outside the classroom, another classmate quickly admitted his mistake and promised to deal with things calmly in the future. As for Xiaobang, his eyes were still burning, his hands were clenched tightly, and he resolutely refused to admit that he was wrong. When he got excited, he raised his finger and pointed at his classmates, and his mouth was filled with dirty words. At this time, I couldn't say anything anymore. I first asked him not to hit anyone in the future, but he just said "hmm".

Looking at his leaving back, I suddenly thought that if a child is aggressive, combative, disrespectful, and distrustful of others, then he is probably a child who lacks love. The reason why Xiaobang acted aggressively was actually to cover up his inner uneasiness and pretend to be strong.

In the evening, I called the parents and communicated my recent observations and thoughts with them. Finally, I suggested that parents create more situations so that their children can feel true love in the family and be willing to give true love. The parents agreed very much with my opinion and expressed that they would fully cooperate with the teacher's work.

The next day, I found time to call Xiaobang to the office. After sharing countless stories, he finally admitted that he was wrong and promised to report to the teacher if he encounters any problems in the future. I patted his shoulder with satisfaction: "Teacher, I believe in you, come on!"

However, within a few days, Xiaobang hit someone again!

The reason is also very simple. During the break, he was scribbling on the blackboard and the class leader criticized him. He kicked him hard without saying a word.

After asking the classmate who was beaten that it was okay, I took Xiaobang directly to the office. For two whole classes, I listened to him complaining with snot and tears: because of his shabby clothes, his classmates looked down on him; because of his poor grades, his classmates laughed at him; because he was fat, his classmates called him a fat pig; because he couldn't do exercises well. Standard, classmates gave him nicknames behind his back... Finally, I asked him: "So, who is your best friend in our class?" He gritted his teeth and said fiercely: "I have no friends, this class, the whole class They are all my enemies!" My heart trembled, why is this child so extreme? I didn't reason any more and just said to him gently: "Teacher thinks that every classmate in our class can be your friend. If you look again, good friends will be hidden around you." He snorted and left.

In order to confirm whether Xiaobang told the truth, I was observing during and after class. I found that he didn’t lie to me: in class, he liked to raise his hands to speak, but every time he was laughed at by his classmates because he couldn’t express what he meant. During class, among the figures in twos and threes, there was always a solitary figure. He (students said that he could go three to five days without taking a shower or changing clothes, and they would not go near him if he smelled bad); during morning exercises, he stood crookedly, and every movement was not in place, but he could move the fat muscles all over his body. His muscles trembled, and the naughty classmates laughed at him on the spot...

After thinking about it again and again, I made full use of my time, talked to the children, shared many stories, and told them: Don't do what you don't want others to do. Give to others; give others roses, and the fragrance will linger in your hands; helping others is helping yourself... After class, I found every opportunity to talk to Xiaobang, encouraging him to do more things for the collective, change clothes and bathe frequently.

Slowly, Xiaobang stopped hitting people casually. With the reminder and help from his family, he gradually learned to take the initiative to help his parents with household chores and tutor his younger siblings with their homework. He also pays more and more attention to personal hygiene, and the odor on his body is naturally not that strong. During class, he often stands next to his classmates with a smile on his face and listens to them talking and laughing. In class, the students were also willing to listen to him answer questions quietly. What was even more surprising was that the squadron leader took the initiative to come to me and said he was willing to sit next to Xiao Bang and help Xiao Bang improve his academic performance. I told Xiaobang about this immediately and asked him: "Are such classmates enemies or friends?" He was embarrassed but said without hesitation: "They are friends!" "Then, our class is not all yours." "Enemies?" "Yes!" Still without hesitation. I greatly praised the squadron leader’s spirit of helping others in class. At that moment, I saw Xiao Bang’s head raised high with a smile on his face. Yes, he has friends, and he is a squadron leader who excels in all aspects! From that day on, Xiaobang became a busy person in the class. After class, he would either rush to wipe the blackboard or look left and right in the classroom. He would carefully straighten the desk if it was crooked, and walk away quickly if there was rubbish on the floor. I picked it up in the past, and when I met a teacher in the corridor, I would take the initiative to send the teaching aids back to the office...

? In the new round of class cadre reelection, Xiaobang became the team leader and labor committee member!

An even bigger surprise also came: that day, the school held unified training. At the end, one of the students forgot to take the water glass. Xiao Bang took it back without saying a word, and the water glass turned out to be the male classmate he had fought with and whom he regarded as his biggest "enemy." I smiled happily. Another day, the squadron leader was too busy to take care of fetching food. Xiaobang quietly picked up her lunch box and fetched food for her. For these two things, I spent half a class meeting to praise Xiaobang. As a result, Xiaobang became more proactive in doing things, smiled more, his homework became tidier day by day, and the number of missed submissions became less and less. At the same time, there are more and more mutual helping behaviors among classmates in the class.

The most unforgettable thing for me was that day, during lunch time, the little gun smashed all the rice that had just been brought back to the ground, and the rice soup was all over the floor. At that time, I was sitting on the small podium eating, but I deliberately said nothing. I wanted to see the results of this period of deliberate education. As Xiaogun said "Ah", many students turned their attention to him. Xiaobang was no exception. He was sitting at the back of the classroom and stood up. After seeing the situation clearly, he immediately turned around and picked up the broom and walked up. Xiaobang's actions also made the classmates react immediately: Xiaodai brought a mop, Xiaolei brought a garbage shovel, Xiaoying opened the table, Xiaoyue took out a tissue, and a classmate reminded Xiaobo to go again It only takes two or three minutes to get a meal. The students all sat back in their seats, and Xiao Zhan had lunch again. During the whole process, our favorite "Western style" without any noise was still maintained in the classroom. Restaurant” environment.

In the class meeting that week, I described every detail of that day in the most sensational way. Of course, the first person mentioned was Xiao Bang, who acted immediately. Finally, I said emotionally: "After so many years, this is the most touching and proud scene. It will be treasured in my heart forever and warm me forever!" The children all looked at me quietly, Tears seemed to be shining in his eyes. As for Xiao Bang, his head was held high, with a look of pride on his face.

In fact, whether Xiaoqin or Xiaobang, deep down they are all lively and enthusiastic children with many advantages and looking forward to the attention of parents and teachers. It is just what we as teachers are learning. I am used to running on the track, and the most concerned thing in my heart is whether the students' performance has improved. I no longer have enough patience to pay attention to and wait for the subtle changes and progress of each child.

I once read a story: There was a person who loved flowers and was very diligent. His yard was always kept clean and not a blade of grass grew. One year he went to work in a distant place and entrusted a friend to take care of the courtyard. In early spring, my friend noticed several clusters of green grass buds sprouting in the yard; in late summer, the grass actually bloomed, and the five-petaled flowers emitted wisps of delicate fragrance. Friends who study plants have verified that this is actually a rare wax orchid. In the city's flower market, one plant costs at least 10,000 yuan! After learning about this, the flower lover said sadly: "In fact, it breaks out of the ground every year, but I think it is an ordinary weed. Every time, the sharp buds are pulled out as soon as they emerge. If you can be patient, By the time it blooms, this wax orchid will have been discovered long ago."

In fact, why are students not just those "grass buds that burst out of the ground"? They need to be carefully protected by their teachers and wait patiently for them to show themselves, discover and realize their own value. If a teacher is impatient with students' temporary shortcomings and shortcomings, it will be like "blindly pulling out those weeds" and leaving behind regrets.

Every student is a lively being. They can fantasize and imagine. They long for beautiful things and yearn for a better future. They can jump, jump, play, create, and innovate. , whimsical... I hope I can be a wise teacher, with enough patience, love, care, confidence, and tolerance to wait for every flower of education to bloom.

I believe that making tea with cold water has its own beauty.

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Teacher Maize, graduated from the Chinese Department of East China Normal University, has been in front-line basic education for 24 years, during which he served as a primary school teacher for 19 years. School education seems to be a simple repetition. When you are in it, you will find that "the sun is new every day" and that "there are no two identical leaves in the world." Over the years, I have grown up in frustration and thought while growing up. Looking back now, I am filled with emotion. I use the platform to organize and share my teaching experience, hoping that it can serve as a source of inspiration.