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The dissatisfied mother-in-law
The dissatisfied mother-in-law
The dissatisfied mother-in-law. In our daily lives, the relationship between people is actually the most difficult to figure out, and the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is even more complicated. It is a kind of relationship that has caused conflicts since ancient times. Many people don’t know how to deal with it. Here’s how to understand the dissatisfied mother-in-law. The dissatisfied mother-in-law 1
How to get along with the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law if she is dissatisfied
Tips for getting along with mother-in-law and daughter-in-law 1: Don’t speak ill of the mother-in-law
Many daughters-in-law have conflicts with their mothers-in-law. , I will move out my husband as a rescuer. If he can rescue, it will be fine, but if he cannot rescue, the trouble will become bigger and bigger. This mentality of complaining cannot be tolerated. Some will even speak ill of their mother-in-law to their three aunts and six mothers-in-law, and then the family heirlooms will be passed down from thousands of families to the ears of the mother-in-law. Then the war between you will never extinguish.
A smart daughter-in-law will not say bad things about her mother-in-law. On the contrary, if she wants to please her mother-in-law, she must say good things. And it must reach her ears.
Tips for getting along with mother-in-law and daughter-in-law 2: Don’t be intimate with husband in front of mother-in-law
Some daughters-in-law like their husbands to serve them food at the dinner table, and they are used to sitting on their husband’s lap when watching TV. You must be restrained in front of your mother-in-law. The first lady may not be able to accept these overly intimate actions. Second, she will get jealous because of it. Therefore, these behaviors will cause your mother-in-law to misunderstand you.
Tips for getting along with mother-in-law and daughter-in-law 3: Don’t speak ill of your husband in front of your mother-in-law
Any mother thinks that her child is the best. If you criticize your husband in front of her, then in his heart I must be thinking: Who are you to dare to say this about my son? No matter how good your husband is, don't complain to her, because your son is her biological son, and you have no blood relationship with her at all.
Tips for getting along with mother-in-law and daughter-in-law 4: Learn from your mother-in-law seriously
As the saying goes: Older mothers still get hotter. This is not unreasonable. If your mother-in-law cooks delicious dishes, then while praising her, you should also say that you hope to learn cooking from your mother-in-law. While praising her mother-in-law, she also enhances her status in the family. This must make the old man happy. But the next step is to take action, and that is to really learn to cook with my mother-in-law.
Tips for getting along with mother-in-law and daughter-in-law 5: Listen to mother-in-law’s nagging
Every elderly person hopes that there will be someone around him who is willing to listen to him, especially a mother-in-law who does not have a wife. Elderly people tend to be nagging. If you can calm down, have a cup of tea with her, and listen to her talk, she will definitely be less prejudiced against you. And listen sincerely, and if necessary, add words such as: "Mom, it's really not easy for you. I must respect you well."
Tips for getting along with mother-in-law and daughter-in-law 6: Be willing to buy gifts for your mother-in-law
On Mother’s Day and her birthday, you must buy gifts for your mother-in-law. Showing your love for your mother-in-law will not only make your husband treat you more A layer of gratitude can also win the love of mother-in-law. So why not. When buying gifts for your mother-in-law, don't insist on how expensive they are, but don't be casual either. It depends on what your mother-in-law needs or lacks. Elderly people are more practical.
Tip 7 for getting along with mother-in-law and daughter-in-law: Change the name of mother-in-law to mother
Many new daughters-in-law cannot call their mother-in-law mother. It's not that they don't want to scream, but they are embarrassed to scream. Comparing your feelings, what will you think when you become a mother-in-law and your daughter-in-law doesn't call you mom? There must be resentment in your heart. That is to say, the mother-in-law still likes her daughter-in-law to be called ***. Speak boldly, everything is difficult at the beginning. Call me mom a few times, and the call will become smoother, and the habit will become natural. As long as the call is sincere, it can bring the distance between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law closer.
Tips for getting along with mother-in-law and daughter-in-law 8: Try not to live with mother-in-law
There is a saying that "distance creates beauty", everyone needs to have independent Space, since you are married, you should not be dependent on your parents and should live separately as much as possible. This can avoid a lot of bumps and bruises and naturally reduce conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
Of course, the consent of the father-in-law and mother-in-law must be obtained.
Tips for getting along with mother-in-law and daughter-in-law 9: Be knowledgeable and sensible
Mother-in-law has strict requirements for her daughter-in-law. In fact, in the final analysis, she is thinking about her son and your husband. Parents love their children and hope that they can find a good partner and spend their future lives together. A well-educated daughter-in-law knows that she loves her husband, and her mother-in-law will also notice it. How can she object if her son has an extra woman to take care of and love her?
Tips for getting along with mother-in-law and daughter-in-law 10: Hardworking and capable
Marrying a wife back home is to take care of the family, for love, and for happiness. Hard-working people will never be disliked. If you are willing to contribute to the family, can do housework and take care of housework, you are a qualified daughter-in-law. You can't do it well yourself, and you still live a life where you have to put on clothes and food, and you still need your husband to take care of you, and your mother-in-law to take care of you. It's strange that the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is not bad. The dissatisfied mother-in-law 2
How to treat the in-laws who are never satisfied
In fact, in most cases, the daughter-in-law subconsciously regards the parents-in-law as "enemies", and it is not entirely because the parents-in-law have done something wrong. What's wrong, but since ancient times, the image of the parents-in-law has been in contrast to the daughter-in-law, causing the daughter-in-law to be on guard and pick on her parents-in-law as soon as she walks in. As a result, it is too difficult to get along peacefully.
If you want to get along well with your parents-in-law, one thing is to treat your parents-in-law correctly in your heart. Don’t chew on your parents-in-law’s words thousands of times in your heart. Think about it, if we don’t treat our parents-in-law as relatives, they How come we are considered a family?
After all, my parents-in-law are not the biological parents who gave birth to me, and we are not their biological daughters. They cannot really love us that much, even too often. They will look at us with a very critical eye. At this time, don’t care too much about those things. Just pretend that you can’t see the picky things and just smile and let it go. As time goes by, the parents-in-law don’t have that much thought to find fault with the daughter-in-law. After all, the parents-in-law are too. Those who love their sons don't want to see their sons looking at their wife's cold face all day long, and they don't want those cold faces to be all because of themselves.
Of course, there are also many parents-in-law, especially mothers-in-law. Faced with their daughter-in-law's repeated concessions and respects, their attitudes will become more and more "bad". They spend all day finding faults in the face of their own problems. When he was a son, all he said was bad about his daughter-in-law.
Faced with such parents-in-law, blindly forbearing and giving in is not enough. You should not face your husband blindly condemning your parents-in-law. You should find an appropriate opportunity to talk to your husband and let him understand your difficulties. , and together with her husband, in front of the parents-in-law, they sincerely expressed their determination to get along well with the parents-in-law, and let the parents-in-law know that because of their pickiness, their son was under heavy mental pressure.
In fact, there are no real evil people in this world. After all, your parents-in-law and you are a real family. No matter how bad your relationship is at this time, you cannot deny that your The child is the grandchild of your parents-in-law, and you cannot cut off that blood relationship.
Some parents-in-law are very picky about their daughters-in-law, but they really love their grandchildren. You might as well take more time to visit your parents-in-law with your children, and talk with them about your children’s education. Of course, you have to Make a gesture of asking for advice. Don't think that your parents-in-law are antiques. They are old people and they must know more than you.
Only by truly understanding a person can you understand that person's psychology, and the same is true for your parents-in-law. If you don't understand your parents-in-law carefully, then you will definitely not understand what they say and do. If you don't like each other, how can you talk about getting along well? Find a time to have a heart-to-heart chat with your parents-in-law as if they were visiting each other, and show your emotions appropriately. It also gives your parents-in-law a chance to understand yourself by looking at some of your own little personalities. At the same time, you can slowly get into the hearts of your parents-in-law and understand their true personality, habits, hobbies, etc.
Don’t worry about how your parents-in-law criticize you. As long as you love that family and your husband, then having a good relationship with your parents-in-law is what you must do.
Furthermore, when you marry that man, you have to bear the responsibility of being a wife. If you love him, you must love his family. No matter what the character of your parents-in-law is, after all, they are your elders. You must also set a good example for your children. When facing your parents-in-law, put a smile on your face, be sweeter in your mouth, and be more diligent in your hands and feet. I think your parents-in-law can warm you up even if they are a piece of ice.
In most families, the mother-in-law’s family and the mother-in-law’s family are in opposition. The father-in-law and the mother-in-law are definitely the people who are looked down upon by the mother-in-law’s parents, and the mother-in-law’s parents are the grains of sand in the eyes of the parents-in-law, for no other reason. , is how we, as daughters and daughters-in-law, deal with problems.
Almost all daughters will tell their biological parents about the bad things about their parents-in-law, and even blame their parents-in-law for things that they understand but are not sure about, not to mention some parents-in-law. What you did is indeed not good. If this happens, can your parents look good on you when they meet your in-laws? When your parents-in-law see the faces of your parents-in-law, do you think they can not blame you? Therefore, getting along with your parents-in-law is a matter of knowledge. Don't blame anyone blindly. If you want to get along peacefully, there is only one way: be attentive. The dissatisfied mother-in-law 3
There are three types of mothers-in-law who are least liked by their daughter-in-law, and they will never do anything to her no matter how nice they are, especially the first type.
A mother-in-law who regards herself as the "Empress Dowager" has to take care of everything in the family
This kind of mother-in-law cannot recognize the facts and feels that she has become a mother-in-law and should be in front of her daughter-in-law. Majestic and majestic.
Aunt Zhang has three sons. The key is that all three sons are filial sons, rich, and really good to her. She broke up the marriages of her three sons. If a son is divorced and you say it was her fault, others may not believe it. However, the three daughters-in-law have taken the initiative to ask for divorce and said they can't stand their mother-in-law, so you have to believe what the daughters-in-law say.
Aunt Zhang didn’t do anything at home. She asked her daughter-in-law to prepare the meal and bring it to her. She also complained in front of her son that her daughter-in-law was not good. She might even be rolling on the floor and forcing her son to beat her. daughter-in-law. If something doesn't go her way at all, she will make a fuss, not letting others laugh at it.
Rich divorced men are prone to remarriage. The two eldest sons have learned their lesson and moved to the county town to stay away from right and wrong. The second marriage is still a happy one. The younger son had less money and would remarry in the countryside, but he told Aunt Zhang that if his wife ran away again, he would not recognize her as his mother and would always protect her and keep her in peace.
This kind of mother-in-law doesn't know how to let go. She has to take care of everything and can't figure out her own position. No matter how kind her daughter-in-law is to her, she won't give up easily.
A mother-in-law who is very dependent on her son interferes in her daughter-in-law’s marriage life
If the mother-in-law has a bad relationship with her husband, if the mother-in-law puts all the focus of her life When you have a son, you will become habitually dependent on your son. If the son does not know how to exit gracefully after he gets married, the daughter-in-law will be troubled.
Mengzi’s mother-in-law really makes her speechless. As long as she is not at home, her mother-in-law will sleep in her master bedroom. In fact, her mother-in-law’s room is as big as hers, but she just likes to sleep in hers. bed. I follow him in everything I do. When I want to watch a movie with my husband, my mother-in-law also follows me. My mother-in-law follows me all the way through my honeymoon.
She felt that there were three people in her marriage, and she seemed to be a beloved concubine. She had to compete with her mother-in-law for "favor". She was really tired and collapsed. I have begun to think about divorce and asked my husband to move out, but he was unwilling.
The lack of emotion will allow you to divert your attention. A mother-in-law who relies too much on her son will inevitably create conflicts and make people unhappy if she still interferes with her daughter-in-law's life after her son gets married.
Deliberately teaching grandchildren to speak ill of their daughter-in-law
Some people say that this kind of mother-in-law may not love her son much when she is young, but when she gets older, But he wanted to teach his grandson and granddaughter bad things, deliberately fabricating unfounded things to make the children reject their mother.
This is the kind of leisurely mother-in-law. When she heard her son imitate her mother-in-law and say bad things about her, she was dumbfounded and didn't understand why her mother-in-law would do this.
Usually, she respects her mother-in-law, and she does all the housework. When she goes to work, she asks her mother-in-law to help take her son to school, but she gets this kind of treatment. She directly told her husband about the seriousness of the problem. Later she found out that her mother-in-law did this deliberately because she was afraid that her child would not be close to her.
Some mothers-in-law are indeed afraid that their grandchildren will not be close to them. In order to bring their children closer to themselves, they teach their children to speak ill of their mother, so that the children can unite with themselves.
Mother-in-laws who do this have psychological problems and have incorrect views. Even if their original intention is to fear that their children will not care about them, they are doing it wrong. If you want to be close to your children, you just have to be nice to them. Although they are young, they can feel who loves them.
A mother-in-law who deliberately teaches her grandchildren to speak ill of her daughter-in-law will make her daughter-in-law very disgusted, and she may end up not having any contact with her until death, which is really annoying.
For some mothers-in-law, no matter how kind their daughter-in-law is to her, it is in vain. Smart people should know the reality - the mother-in-law is not the mother. Don't think that your mother-in-law treats you like a daughter. Think about it from her perspective. Can you treat your mother-in-law as your biological mother?
If you can’t do that, don’t force your mother-in-law to be nice to you. Any relationship is mutual. If you are kind to your mother-in-law, but she still doesn't take you seriously and is domineering in front of you, then show your bottom line and ask her to be honest.
When you keep your bottom line and let people know that you are not someone to be bullied, no one will dare to do harm to you easily.
There are good mothers-in-law, and of course there are bad mothers-in-law. If you meet a bad mother-in-law, don't live together, understand the principle of far-off fragrance and near-office, and handle the relationship between them well.
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