People's congress joke

1, a person goes to the zoo as an animal keeper. The director said to him, "well, I'll test you." Is there any way to make the elephant shake his head first, then nod, and finally jump into the swimming pool? " The man said, "Easy!" So he went up to the elephant and said, "Do you know me?" The elephant shook his head. The man asked again, "Are you angry?" The elephant nodded. The man then picked up the awl and pricked the elephant's ass. The elephant jumped into the swimming pool in pain.

The director saw it and said, "You are too unsympathetic to be an animal keeper." The man said, "Give me another chance and I will be gentle." Chang Yuan said, "Well, all three conditions are the same, but you can't do it this time." The man agreed, walked up to the elephant and said, "Are you still angry?" The elephant shook his head. The man asked again, "Do you know me now?" The elephant nodded. The man asked again, "Do you know what to do now?" Hearing this, the elephant turned and jumped into the swimming pool.

2. A pair of football players go to other countries to play football. One day, during the break, they wandered in the street. Suddenly, a baby fell from the tenth floor, and the goalkeeper instinctively jumped out and caught the child. People in the street praised him one by one, only to see the goalkeeper smile, habitually pat the child twice, and one big foot went out. ...

A person who just learned a foreign language was walking in the street that day and accidentally stepped on a foreigner's foot. The man quickly said, "I'm sorry." The foreigner also said politely, "I'm sorry, too." Hearing this, the man quickly said, "I'm sorry, three." When the foreigner heard this, he asked, "What are you sorry for?" The man said helplessly, "I'm sorry for five. "

4, a group of vampire bats can't find food, and when they are hungry, they bump into each other in the cave. This is a bat's mouth full of blood. All bats envy and ask, "Where did you find the blood?" Then the bat took them to a big tree and asked, "See?" The bat said, "Yes." The bat said, "I didn't fucking see it just now!" " ! ! "