A joke about getting up in the morning with a stomachache

1. A coal seller and an egg seller got into a fight. Everyone looked around and asked curiously why. The egg seller said, "Is there anyone like him?" I shouted: Eggs! "He immediately shouted:" Coal (not) sold ~ ~! ! "

3. Mom flies in with little flies to eat. They fly on a pile of cow dung. The little fly asked gloomily, "Mom, why do we always eat cow dung?" The mother fly slapped the little fly and scolded, "This unlucky child, don't say such disgusting things when eating!" " "

A woman got on the bus with her child. The driver said, "This is the ugliest doll I have ever seen." The woman said to the man next to her, "The driver insulted me!" The man said, "Go get even with him! I'll hold your monkey. "

The painter stood on the ladder and painted the ceiling of the mental hospital. A patient said to him, "Take your pen and don't let go." Painter: "I can hold it." Patient: "Then I'll bring your ladder and use it."

6. In the classroom, Amin put his lunch box in front of Ahua next to him and said, "Try my meal." Iowa scooped up a spoonful and fed it into her mouth. "Did you see it?" Amin added.

Xiao Ming's face is swollen. The classmate asked the reason. Xiaoming said, "I went boating in the park yesterday, and a bee landed on my face." The classmate asked, "Why not just drive him away?" Xiao Ming: "Before, my father killed it with an oar."

8. Three poor farmers are chatting in the field. A: I'm going to be a big official, and I will eat steamed buns for every meal. B: Then I'll eat a big bowl of beef noodles every day. C: I'm going to be an official. No one is allowed to pick up dung in the village. They are all mine!

9. One night, a classmate in the university dormitory was rubbing his eyes. Another classmate: the magazine said that rubbing your eyes might wear off your cornea. At this time, I listened to the electricity and only said to the classmate who rubbed his eyes, ah! My cornea has been worn off!

10. Two colleagues were drunk after drinking, and one of them rolled his tongue and said, What I saw was double-decker. The other man quickly took out a 10 dollar bill from his pocket and said, here is my 20 dollars.

1 1. The Minister of Family Planning went to the countryside for a census and asked the old farmer: Do you know why close relatives can't get married? The old farmer smiled with a simple and honest smile: Hehe ... I'm too familiar with it, so I'm embarrassed to start.

12. A group of people went camping at the seaside. A buddy on the road has been eating fried soybeans. Everyone was afraid that he would eat more fart and advised him not to eat any more. His answer is: after you go camping, I will fry fish for you in the sea!

13. It is said that a doctor went to a restaurant to eat, and the waiter handed over the menu. When the doctor saw the waiter's hand scratching behind his ass, he casually said: There are hemorrhoids! The waiter said politely, please order from the menu, sir.

Are you happy?