Ask for some funny metaphors about life

Qian Zhongshu said in the besieged city that snoring is like flying a long kite.

There is also a classmate who said that he drooled when he slept in the library, just like stalactites in his later years.

Murakami said that silence means that "all the rain in the world is as quiet as the lawn all over the world."

water curtain cave with a cold and a runny nose

Your IQ is lower than that of a jellyfish

Life is like rape. When you can't resist it, just enjoy it

How stupid you are like a ren

A depressed man walks in the cold wind

-even a piece of toilet paper and a pair of underwear have their uses

Just like a piece of shit, a pair of underwear. In fact, the fastest speed of people is not comparable to that of pigs.

The feeling of falling in love with you is erectile xx, and I just pressed it and jumped up again

One night, when a classmate was idle and bored, I was next to a beautiful woman YY. I said, forget it, she won't even look at you if she is blind in the ass.

Life is like rape, pain and happiness.

In middle school, a strongman transferred from a foreign language school to our affiliated high school. In order to show that the attached middle school is much bigger than the foreign language school, he said: If the attached middle school is an ass, the foreign language school is only as big as an ass!

I love you and I don't lie to you, just like a meat clam loves a corpse.

He runs faster than a snail.

Wukong says, "Aha! I didn't expect you to be more stupid than my younger brother! "

You're a human being.

A fake A-League without promotion or demotion is like a man who doesn't SJ in XX and never has an orgasm.

A buddy compared winamp's dfx plug-in to monosodium glutamate

Loneliness is just a callused hand.

A wedding dress is just a guarantee for a woman, just like a condom is just a guarantee for a man. The only problem is that when a woman wants to wear a wedding dress and a man wants to wear a condom, there may be no guarantee.

Toilet is just another kind of all is forgiven, so what we talk about is just spinning outside underwear, so it's called pervert. What really spins inside underwear is not only pervert but also lewdness.

it's not that you can't live without toilet paper, but it's too uncomfortable. Not having a girlfriend is like not having toilet paper. Although it won't kill people, it is very uncomfortable. And the similarity between the two is that the older you get, the more embarrassing this is.

The landlord's expression seems to be sitting on a toilet with a broken beer bottle in it.

Love at first sight: just like the collision of two stars in the universe, there is no skill but luck.

The landlord looks like a food ticket.

"It's like stepping through a rotting corpse and screaming ..."

A husband thinks that his wife's nakedness is too loose after giving birth, saying: It's like driving a train through a cave with you ...

Time goes back and forth like a meat bun hitting a dog.

people who are beautiful in appearance but ugly in heart are still ugly. Just like even if the toilet is full of fragrant flowers, the toilet still stinks.

kindness is a kindness that feeds back. Lambs have the meaning of kneeling and suckling, but animals still do, let alone people. So we should remember to be filial to our parents, just like taking toilet paper when going to the toilet.

The landlord loves you occasionally, just like a mouse loves rice ...

Zhao Benshan's face is like discussing whether the eunuch will have a boy or a girl.

One day, I was chatting with my classmates in the dormitory and talking about someone's younger brother. One classmate suddenly said, "Oh, I've seen his younger brother, just like Jay Chou ..." Everyone was amazed and he continued to finish the sentence: "All faces are deformed" ... Everyone fainted.

Don't worry, I can definitely keep a secret and not tell others. It's like-everyone's P eyes are facing down, but they are watertight.

farting can't hide your beauty!

Naked Truth "

Qian Lao described the children on the ship as" the eyebrows and eyes are so far apart that they are lovesick "

............, a strong man

................ with anal fissure

I am more like a pig because I don't want to be a' JIAN' person!

a writer said that life is like a slow death, and I think the word "besieged city" is the strongest metaphor. The level of money is really not comparable to that of ordinary people.

One night, a mosquito landed on jane doe's face, and the woman was about to hit her. Suddenly, she found that the mosquito fell off with a twisted leg in her arms and rolled on the bed.

Qian Lao's metaphor is personally the most handsome. Brothers are like brothers, and wives are as handsome as clothes

. There is only one word, but they have followed me all my life.

Women are eighteen and eleven flowers, and women are forty tofu.