A joke that misunderstood China people.

This is Cao Yunjin Liu Yuntian's cross talk. There are videos on the internet. You can imitate them. I cut some lines and made some changes. Easier to understand. I hope it helps you.

Fashion life

A: Thank you for your applause.

B: Thank you.

A: We are very sad to stand on this stage.

Well, of course.

A: The whole station is full of stars and big names.

B: That's right.

A: Only the two of us are nobody.

B: That's right.

A: How can He De stand on this stage?

Hmm.

A: I'm afraid people are not very familiar with us.

I don't know.

Then introduce yourself.

B: there is an explanation.

A: My name is * *, and I am the most common member of our company.

You are very modest.

A: I haven't learned crosstalk for many years. Please forgive me if I can't make it.

B: Sweet mouth.

This is my partner.

B: It's me.

A: We are partners on the stage.

Hmm.

A: We are good friends under the stage.

B: That's right.

A: I can't describe how good it is.

B: That would be great.

A: Our relationship.

Hmm.

A: It's quite bitter.

B: Hey.

A: Of course.

B: Isn't that the enemy? We are good friends.

A: I have a good relationship.

B: That's right.

This is my true friend.

Yes, biological ... do friends have biological ones?

A: It's so close.

B: What a good friend.

A: * * is simple and honest. Everyone knows that * * is a good person at a glance.

B: Oh.

A: I'm always happy when I'm on stage.

Hello.

A: Why? There is a happy event.

B: Oh.

A: Did you find a girlfriend?

B: That's right.

I met that girl. She's beautiful.

B: Oh.

A: He told me that I like this oval face and big eyes.

B: That's right.

A: I finally found someone with big face and big eyes.

Oh, I'm ... so shabby (an expression). Don't learn.

It looks like this.

B: I changed the shield.

A: It's still beautiful every day.

B: Yes.

A: Indeed, I am very happy every day.

Hmm.

A: Both of them are standing on the stage, but their positions and positions are completely different.

B: Yes.

A: I am much worse than * *

Don't say that.

I am an amateur comedian.

B: Oh.

You see, he's different.

B: Why?

A: Treat crosstalk as a joke.

B: Oh.

A: This is entertainment.

B: Yes.

A: People have money at home and don't care.

Hello.

A: I'm here to study. How can I come?

Hmm.

To save money and protect our nature at the same time, right? I come by bike.

B: Oh.

A: My home is in Fuyang. Is it easy for me to get here?

B: Not easy.

I have lost weight since I came here.

B: OK.

A: Is it easy for me to drink water now?

Never heard of it.

A: People are different. When they come to school, they send them by car.

B: It's more convenient this way.

Driving a Lamborghini.

B: nice car.

A: It's just that getting on the bus is more troublesome.

B: What?

You must stuff meat into it.

Am I that fat?

A: It's too expensive.

Nothing is better than money.

A: It's fashionable in life.

Really?

A: Ah, everyone wears fashionable clothes and carries fashionable handbags when they go out.

Hello.

A: I don't understand big brands either.

Hmm.

You see, I have no money in my pocket and no wallet. People are different.

Hmm.

A: People go out with handbags.

B: Oh.

A: I don't understand luxury brands either. They're just l and v.

B: Alas.

A: It's called the donkey tag.

B: Donkey. ...

Answer: l, v donkey, big donkey brand, donkey skin Ejiao.

I haven't heard of it. I have a sticky hand named Lu.

A: Yes, it's called Alas.

Oh, my God.

Well, it's just too expensive. Sold out, alas.

Hello.

A: I feel distressed, alas.

B: Stop it. Isn't this destructive?

A: The same is true for references. Oh, my God.

B: Come on, isn't this a joke?

Take a bag. Ouch!

Louis vuitton.

A: Yes, yes, and then put on your shoes and cry.

B: Huh?

A: You can cry after buying shoes.

B: Oh, still crying.

A: The necklace I wore bullied you.

B: What do you mean by bullying me? Her name is Tiffany.

A: They are all famous brands anyway.

Hello.

A: Not like us.

Really?

A: His fashion is reflected in his life.

Hello.

A: Then there are some accessories.

Hmm.

A: I am different.

What about you?

A: how can it be fashionable?

B: You

A: I am reflected in my study.

B: Oh.

A: Crosstalk performers have four subjects: speaking, learning and singing.

basic skill

A: Neither door is easy.

Hmm.

A: The hardest thing is learning. We have to learn everything.

B: Oh.

A: I am a very fashionable person.

B: Oh.

A: I can't fall behind. You see, I'm not blindly traditional.

Hmm.

A: I surf the Internet, too. I chat.

Wow.

A: With the chat tool, let me talk about the little penguin.

Hey, what's a chick?

A: Little Penguin, leave a message.

Hmm.

A: creaking.

Oh, make a noise.

A: Someone is online.

Hmm.

A: (tapping the microphone)

Oh, right, right, right.

Someone knocked at the door.

Hmm.

A: There is news.

What is this?

A: Cough.

B: Hey, ok.

A: Is that right?

Hmm.

A: There is a scientific name here.

B: it's called.

A: It's called acne.

B: Hey, no.

A: I have played this before.

This is outrageous. They call it QQ.

A: Please, QQ is a car.

B: Hey, which QQ?

A: Chery QQ.

This is a chat tool.

A: Chat tools.

B: Hey.

I surf the internet, too

B: Yes.

Yes, I am very fashionable.

B: Oh.

A: Learn English.

B: English.

Why do you think crosstalk performers should learn English?

B: Exactly.

I want to learn English so that our foreign friends can understand cross talk.

B: That's good.

A: Of course, my English level is very high.

Really?

A: Major.

Oh, open your mouth.

Of course, I can talk with foreign friends very fluently in the street.

B: Then how do you communicate?

I even met Peter when I came.

B: Oh.

A: Hello.

B: Oh.

Have you eaten? I don't understand.

How fresh! You must speak English.

He doesn't understand Chinese. It doesn't matter.

Hmm.

Speak English.

B: That's right.

A: English is OK. Hello, can you speak Chinese?

B: OK.

Peter looked at me stupidly.

Hmm.

Speak slowly, I can understand you.

Wow, Peter can do it.

Let me speak slowly.

B: That's right.

Can you speak Chinese?

B: Hey.

Speak slowly, I can understand you.

Ah, yes.

A: Slow down.

Hmm.

Can you speak Chinese?

Oh, dear.

Slow down, I understand ... I'm slow enough.

B: ...

A: I can't connect anymore, you know?

B: No.

What a bully, isn't it?

No, I said you were sick, you know?

You're sick.

B: Not you. What happened? I ask you to speak Chinese slowly so that people can understand.

Hi, I think I should speak English slowly.

Hello.

A: I said it was too difficult, too difficult.

B: Yes, yes.

The methods I have summed up in learning English must be practiced in daily life.

negligible

A: In daily life, food is useful.

What about you?

A: Food is useful.

B: Don't talk together.

A: Who said that together?

B: it's easy to misunderstand.

A: Food is useful.

B: Mm-hmm.

A: For example, apples.

What do you mean?

A: Words

Ask me.

Apple Inc

B: It's very simple.

Apple Inc

Anyone can.

A: If you want to send ai, don't say it.

I can say.

You have one.

Apple Inc

A: No, be naive and send an apple.

An apple

A: Being naive doesn't mean being a bitch.

Who is being a bitch? You asked me to do this.

A: Peng Wenshuo, your mother wants you to go home for dinner.

B: Hey, where is this sentence?

A: What a mess.

No, I ... Number.

Oranges, oranges

Oh, this is an orange. What about bananas?

banana

B: what did dad say?

father

Where's mom?

mother

Where's Grandpa?

A: Dad's dad.

B: yes, then don't ask. Grandma is mom's mom.

Come on, that's grandma.

B: That is. ...

Grandma is mom's mom. You are so creative.

B: Hey, no, no.

A: I am so excited.

B: Hey, ok.

A: I am amazing.

I don't understand?

This English is difficult.

B: it's too complicated.

A: The logic must be clear.

B: Yes.

A: Be careful.

Hmm.

A: Grandpa is her father, grandma is her mother, grandpa is her mother, grandma is her mother, remember, and then my great-grandfather is ...? It's too difficult!

Hello.

(curtain call)