How to deal with interpersonal relationships among family members

Brothers live in harmony, and the relationship is between the eldest brother and the eldest sister. The eldest brother and eldest sister should take part of the responsibility for family education. They should be knowledgeable about their younger brothers and sisters and care about their growth. . Do more housework and set an example in everything. Honor your parents, do your best, and set an example for your younger siblings. Try your best to tolerate material enjoyment from your younger brothers and sisters, and try your best to patiently persuade your younger brothers and sisters to have certain excessive demands on your younger brothers and sisters, and tolerate your younger brothers with a magnanimous mind. The younger brothers and sisters are young and ignorant, and the older brothers should treat the younger ones gently and rationally. When the younger brothers and sisters feel that their elder brothers and sisters love and help them like their parents, they will deepen their feelings for the elder brothers and sisters. In this way , the relationship will be very harmonious. When brothers and sisters grow up, some get married and live separately. They should often move around each other, sit with each other, chat about work, study, and life, support and encourage each other, and help each other when they have difficulties. For younger brothers and sisters who have not yet started a family, they should help give ideas and be a good "consultant" to help them build a happy and happy family. Support for parents after separation. Care must be properly arranged, and we must rush to shoulder more obligations of respecting and caring for the elderly. During the New Year and holidays, brothers and sisters should try their best to reunite with the elderly and enjoy family happiness. Brothers and sisters should not complain or ignore each other if they make mistakes or mistakes in work or life, let alone discriminate. They should follow the spirit of "treating illnesses and saving lives", patiently and carefully understand the situation, and do a good job of helping and educating. Let him or her recognize and correct mistakes faster. In short, brothers and sisters are born from the same roots and share the same brotherhood. As long as they always treat each other sincerely, they will be able to live in harmony for a long time. 4: Brothers are formed from the same "father's essence and mother's blood", but they are only physically separated. Therefore, a natural sense of intimacy between brothers is in line with God's ethical requirements. If brothers become estranged or even turn against each other, it not only violates the wishes of their parents, but also violates the laws of nature. This is an obvious truth. Brothers who have lived together since childhood should have a practical foundation of deep feelings. Brothers should be close to each other and should not be alienated. This is the nature of brotherhood. Based on this, brothers should care for each other just like their shapes and shadows, sounds and sounds; they should love the remains of their ancestors and cherish the vitality of their own bodies. Translated into modern language, it means: After the death of parents, brothers should take care of each other like their bodies. As closely as its shadow, the sound is as close as its echo. When it comes to caring for each other's bodies given by our ancestors, and cherishing each other's blood and blood from our parents, who else but brothers would love and care for each other like this? 5: Some brothers have had a very good relationship since childhood: they even use the same language when telling jokes, and they live in harmony and are always open to the outside world. But when the elder brother got married, the brotherhood took a 180-degree turn, and even broke up and stopped communicating. At this time, as the eldest brother and eldest sister, you have to think twice. It should be time to wake up, and the younger brothers and sisters also have it. What's wrong is that older brothers, older sisters, and older sisters-in-law should be more tolerant of younger siblings. Maybe your younger siblings will understand that you are caring for her (him) when they reach your age... A friendly family. It can also be said to be a family history relationship that develops after children want to get married. Since they are in-laws, they should be very close. In some rural areas, it is said that after children get married, they call each other's parents the in-laws, which is called "in-laws". . . Originally, children became a very close family after they got married. However, why would the in-laws start fighting again? There would be big quarrels and minor quarrels every day. . . . . . . As a daughter-in-law, you should respect your mother-in-law more, because she is older and has rich experience in housekeeping or teaching children; as a mother-in-law, you should not always put on airs in front of your daughter-in-law, but should see your daughter-in-law's strengths and respect your daughter-in-law's opinions, especially her upbringing. child problems. In other words, both parties must cooperate with and respect each other. When mother-in-law and daughter-in-law live together for many years, some incongruous things will inevitably happen. At this time, it is even more important for both parties to understand each other. The principles advocated by our ancestors in dealing with interpersonal relationships, such as "put yourself in their shoes", "use yourself to judge others", and "don't do to others what you don't want others to do to you", etc., all contain the idea of ??understanding and are the "gold and jade" in dealing with interpersonal relationships. "Good advice" is of course completely suitable for dealing with the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. When there are differences, avoid conflicts and put courtesy first. Once friction occurs between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, no matter what is right or wrong, the daughter-in-law must tolerate it first and never be tit-for-tat. Just listen to what your mother-in-law says, and wait until both parties have calmed down before discussing the causes and solutions to the conflict. In this way, your mother-in-law will be full of face and will find ways to make up for her mistakes in the future, and you will be a good daughter-in-law who understands the general situation in her eyes.

In addition, if the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law have opinions on a daily basis, they should not talk nonsense to neighbors, colleagues or friends. There is a popular saying among Chinese people: "The less things you carry, the less you carry; the more you carry, the more words you carry." This refers to the adverse effects of "passing on words" in interpersonal relationships. If a mother-in-law and a daughter-in-law are at odds, they will tell their relatives, friends and neighbors, and if they are passed around, the situation will be completely different, which will only aggravate the conflict. As mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, we should take this as a warning. Elderly people who are materially filial and emotionally communicative are relatively fragile emotionally, are afraid of loneliness, and like to nag. As a daughter-in-law, if you can chat more with your mother-in-law, do more housework, and buy more things that the elderly like to eat, it will greatly comfort the elderly's lonely heart. In addition to material filial piety, you should also pay attention to emotional communication with your mother-in-law and eliminate psychological barriers. Therefore, a daughter-in-law should often check in with her mother-in-law. Whenever the elderly person is unwell, she needs to take even more care of her. Especially when it comes to raising children, the daughter-in-law should inform her mother-in-law no matter what she does, so that she can also feel satisfied. Play the intermediary role of your son. The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is originally a new family interpersonal relationship formed by the extension of the parent-child relationship and the relationship between husband and wife. The son plays an "intermediary" role in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Sons can help mother-in-law and daughter-in-law communicate psychologically. For example, if there is something good about the mother-in-law at home on weekdays, the son can ask his wife to come forward more often, for his mother's birthday, and if he buys something, ask his wife to come forward to give it to the elderly, etc. These strategies are helpful for emotional communication between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. When conflicts arise between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, the son can play a guiding role. Since the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law lack the intimacy between mother and child, as well as the closeness between husband and wife, the gap that arises is often difficult to eliminate. Through the son's dealing with it, the psychological barrier can be eliminated and the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can reconcile as before. There used to be two old ladies who had nothing to do after dinner, so they had a family chat under the big tree on the edge of the yard: One said that his daughter-in-law was too much and didn’t do any housework every day. She only played and didn’t eat. I don’t like to do it, and I still don’t get up until after 10 o’clock every morning. My son had to carry her meals to her new house and wash her clothes. I really couldn't stand it. How can I, the mother-in-law you call me, get along with her? The other one listened in his heart, and after a while he asked the old lady who just spoke: Is your daughter better? The whole village is happy to find a good husband. When she heard someone praising her daughter, the old lady said straight away: Yes, our daughter is married and living a very good life now. She doesn’t have to do any housework every day. She just plays and doesn’t need to eat. She cooks, and she still wants to sleep until after 10 o'clock every morning. My son-in-law has to carry her meals to the new house to eat, and my son-in-law washes her clothes. This is how she feels... Cups, all The villagers had nothing to say. ,, it will take many years for a daughter to become a daughter-in-law, and it will take many years for a daughter-in-law to become a mother-in-law. ． ． ． ． Some people say: "Brothers hate sisters-in-law." This is not correct, but it does mean that in family relationships, the most tense and difficult thing is probably the conflict between sisters-in-law. This kind of conflict will inevitably be reflected in brotherly and family relationships. Therefore, helping the sisters-in-law to establish a harmonious relationship and resolve the conflicts between them in a reasonable and reasonable manner will help to deal with the relationship between brothers and the entire family. So, why is the relationship between sisters-in-law so tense and difficult to get along with? What is the reason? First, they do not understand each other and are suspicious of each other. Since sisters-in-law do not live together since childhood like brothers and sisters, their emotional foundation is not as deep as that of brothers and sisters, and their temperaments, hobbies, and specialties do not understand each other as well as brothers and sisters do, so they are prone to wariness and suspicion. In addition, they take care of a lot of housework and have a lot of contact with each other, which easily exposes their thoughts that cannot be put on the table, leading to conflicts and friction. Second, he is very selfish and caressing about things. As soon as someone becomes a daughter-in-law and enters the door of her husband's family, the first thing that comes to mind is not how to maintain and develop this big family, but how to separate the family as soon as possible and lead a separate life. They often think: They want to separate the family anyway, so they can't be fools. As a result, the brothers and sisters-in-law were always at odds with each other. They did not take care of many common things and did not buy many edible things. They just picked and took what they could, just to take advantage of "everyone". Some sisters-in-law are afraid that they will suffer a disadvantage and be offended, so they want to have the upper hand in everything and refuse to give in at all. Often you think she doesn't do enough, and she thinks you don't pay enough; you say your mother-in-law is biased, and she says your father-in-law is biased; you scold her child for lacking education, and she scolds your child for being lacking in talent. A small thing can lead to endless nagging. They even criticized Sang and Huai, talked back and quarreled. They had conflicts and conflicts with each other, which turned into a deadlock. In the end, they really couldn't live together and had to separate.

If you want to change the above-mentioned tension between the sisters-in-law, you must pay attention to the following two points: 1. Help the sisters-in-law establish a deep relationship and properly resolve the conflicts between them. This requires brothers to do more work, educate their lovers to be open-minded, not to worry about personal gains and losses, and to correctly deal with issues that are prone to conflicts between sisters-in-law. For example, when parents are old, it is difficult to help their daughters-in-law do some housework and raise children as much as they can. In this case, you should not just care about yourself and just calculate your own small accounts. Three ways and four ways to provoke contradictions. Another example is that parents tend to help their daughter-in-law more when they are having difficulties in life. They should understand the kind-heartedness of their parents and should not be jealous or compare themselves to others. In addition, when brothers separate, they must educate their spouse to develop their style and be willing to suffer losses when it comes to the distribution of property, support for parents, and other handling of various relationships. In this way, the conflicts between the sisters-in-law will naturally be reduced, and the emotions will naturally be harmonious. 2. Sisters-in-law should be considerate and considerate of each other, be kind to others, and think more about each other. Between sisters-in-law, humility is the most important thing. Everyone has self-esteem, and the self-esteem between sisters-in-law is even stronger. If everyone wants to gain the upper hand, there will be a situation of tit-for-tat, which will inevitably strain the relationship. If everyone could be considerate and humble, things would be easier to handle. For example, you should compete to do the heavy and dirty work at home, and try to let the other person do the good things when you encounter them. If you have delicious food, you might as well let the other person eat more. If you have good clothing materials, you would rather let the other person make them if you don’t have them yourself. If you don’t have enough theater or movie tickets, then let the other person go see them. Give the other person whatever the parents-in-law buy for them. , don’t pry, don’t be jealous, the parents-in-law take care of each other’s children, give money, don’t talk too much, don’t care, etc. This is not weakness, but it just shows that your style is noble. As the saying goes, "People's hearts change people's hearts." "You respect me a foot, and I respect you a foot." If you do this, things will be easier to handle. Especially when encountering a careless sister-in-law, if one party takes the initiative to help enthusiastically, the relationship between the two parties will gradually improve. We have heard of a pair of sisters-in-law who were originally estranged from each other, especially the brother-in-law who had strong opinions and did not even cross the threshold of the brother-in-law's family. later. When my sister-in-law gave birth to a baby, my brother and sister-in-law took the initiative to visit and help my sister-in-law. They took her to the health center in person and took good care of her. They also brought her delicious food and made new clothes for my fat nephew. My sister-in-law was moved, and her original opinions disappeared. From then on, they became a pair of good sisters-in-law who were praised far and wide, and the relationship between brothers became closer. The sisters-in-law came into the same family from different families. Their living habits, personalities and hobbies are all different, and some are even very different. But this cannot be a reason for not getting along with each other. A family is also a small group. Everyone should work together to maintain this small group, live in harmony, and build this family into a friendly and warm small group. This requires sisters-in-law to consider the overall situation, be style-conscious, be less suspicious, care less, care for each other, and respect each other. We should be sisters-in-law, sisters, and comrades, living in harmony and treating each other in a friendly manner. Even if the family needs to be separated, it should be done in a harmonious way, and the two should be affectionate and frequent.