Math stories in the first grade

Mathematicians and their girlfriends are walking in the park. His girlfriend asked him, "Do you really mind my freckles?"

The mathematician replied softly, "Absolutely not! I was born to like dealing with decimal points. "

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Love circle

A young man and a young woman are sitting on the beach. The young man drew a circle on the ground and said, "My love for you, like this circle, will never end."

The young woman also drew a circle on the ground with her finger and said, "My love for you will never begin."

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abstract

A friend of my friend drank too much at one time in the restaurant. It's almost an hour before business hours.

The waiter came to remind you that you can leave. At that time, the Great Xia said a very shocking sentence.

He said so. "Don't mess with me, or I'll beat you in the abstract."

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fire fighting

One day, the mathematician felt that he had had enough of mathematics and ran to the fire brigade to announce that he wanted to be a fireman. The fire chief said, "You look good, but I have to give you a test first."

The fire chief took the mathematician to the backyard alley of the fire brigade. There is a warehouse, a fire hydrant and a hose in the alley. The fire chief asked, "Suppose the warehouse was on fire, what would you do?" The mathematician replied, "I connected the fire hydrant to the water pipe, opened the water pipe and put out the fire."

The fire chief said, "Exactly! Last question: suppose you walk into an alley and the warehouse is not on fire, what would you do? " The mathematician pondered for a long time and finally replied, "I'll just set fire to the warehouse." The fire chief shouted, "What? That's terrible! Why did you set fire to the warehouse? " The mathematician replied, "In this way, I will simplify the problem into a problem that I have solved."

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Mathematicians' humor

A statistician met a mathematician, and the statistician made fun of the mathematician and said:

Not that if x = y and y = z, then x = z! Then I think if you like a girl, then you will also like the boy that the girl likes! ? "

The mathematician thought for a moment and asked.

Then you put your left hand in a pot of 100 degree boiling water, and your right hand in a pot of 0 degree ice water, and you'll be fine! Because they are only 50 degrees on average! "

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polygraph

Dad has a polygraph. He asked his son, "How was your math today?"

The son replied, "90 points." The polygraph rang.

The son added, "70 points." The polygraph is still ringing.

Dad shouted angrily, "I used to get more than 90 points." At this time, the polygraph fell down without sound.

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like

The professor is a kind and humorous old man, and there is a tall and strong PE student in his class. Every time the professor's voice rings in class, the PE students start to sleep until they wake up on time after class.

One day, the sports student was late, and the professor kindly said to him, "Jack, please don't be late in the future, it will affect your normal sleep."

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count

My son is three years old. He already knows how to count from one to ten, and he also knows that five is bigger than one. I also look for opportunities to teach him at any time and ask him which is bigger, the dog or the kitten.

Once, I took a chocolate in my left hand and two chocolates in my right hand and asked him, "Which side is more?" . My son didn't answer, so I continued to ask patiently. The son burst into tears and said, "There are few faces!" "

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The application of logic

A student asked Einstein what was the use of logic.

Einstein asked him, "Two people climbed out of the chimney. One had soot on his face and the other was clean. Which one do you think should take a bath? "

"The dirty one, of course." The student said.

"No .." Where will the dirty one take a bath when he sees the other person clean and thinks he won't be dirty either? "

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Interesting job search

Chen Liyan went to apply for a job. The manager asked him, "How much salary do you ask for a year? 」

"With my working ability, I should be able to earn an annual salary of 18,000 yuan," Chen Liyan said.

The manager stared at him for a while, and then said, "Is it worth a year 18000 yuan?" Is it clear? There are only 365 days in a year. If you sleep eight hours a day, a year is 122 days. 365 days minus 12 1 day. Furthermore, you have eight hours of rest and entertainment besides going to work in the mountains every day, which means 122 days a year. Then subtract 12 1 day from 243 days, leaving only 12 1 day. But there are 52 weeks in a week, and there is no work on Sundays, so 12 1 day subtracts 52 days to leave 69 days. At the same time, every Saturday afternoon is a holiday, so there are 26 days in a year, so 69 days MINUS 26 days leaves 43 days. Minus the two-week annual leave given by the company, there are only 29 days left. Don't forget to have an hour's lunch every day, which means 15 days a year. 29 MINUS 15, leaving 14 days. Excluding public holidays such as the new calendar year, the old calendar year, Mid-Autumn Festival, Easter, Thanksgiving, Christmas *** 10, that is to say, I only work four days a year. Do you think it's worth 18 thousand yuan? 」

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The professor said ....

One day, a professor suddenly stopped teaching and seriously said to everyone:

If the classmate sitting in the middle chatting can be as quiet as the classmate sitting in the back playing cards, then the classmate sleeping in front will not be disturbed.

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check tickets

The old professor travels by train. When the conductor came to check the ticket, he couldn't find it. The old professor was sweating with anxiety. The conductor said, forget it, just make up a ticket.

Old Professor: How did this happen? I don't know where I'm going until I find that ticket!

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The mystery of the inscription

Diao Fandu, a famous mathematician in Alexandria, ancient Greece, is only known as a man in the 3rd century A.D., but his age and life history books are not clearly recorded. However, we can still learn a thing or two from his tombstone, which tells people all the year round that he is 84 years old.

The complicated tombstone is like this:

Diao Fan sleeps here. If you understand the mystery of the inscription, it will tell you the whole life span of the carving fan. The gods gave him 1/6 of life as his childhood. After112 of life, he grew a beard, and then Diao Fan got married, but he had no children, so he spent 1/7 of life. Five years later, he had his first son, but his beloved son died young.

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Questions and answers

Teacher: "I give my classmates two questions." The person who answers the first question does not need to answer the second question. Now I ask the first question: Who knows how many hairs they have? "

Xiaoli: "I know, I have 99,999 hairs."

Teacher: "How do you know?"

Xiaoli: "Teacher, this is the second question. You can't ask me to answer. "

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Paradox problem

I am discussing a paradox with my classmates: the only barber in the village has to cut the hair of those who don't, and ask who the barber is. It's really hard! Barbers cut their own hair, so they cut their own hair. A barber won't cut his own hair unless he cuts his own. How profound! The discussion was fruitless for a long time.

The classmate in the back row inserted a sentence: "This is not simple, the barber is bald!" "

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How many times?

The teacher asked in class, "/kloc-How many wars happened in Spain in the 5th century?"

"Six times." A student answered quickly.

"Which six times?" The teacher asked again.

"The first time, the second time, the third time, the fourth time, the fifth time and the sixth time."

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mathematician

There are two kinds of mathematicians in the world: those who can count and those who can't.

There are two kinds of people in the world: those who believe and those who don't.

There are two kinds of people in the world: one can be classified as one and the other can't.