Who can tell a lovely joke in English?

Mrs. Brown, the cat and mouse, went to visit a friend of hers. She took a small box with holes in the top. "What's in your box?" The friend asked. "A cat," Mrs. Brown answered. "You see, I've been dreaming about mice at night, and I'm scared! This cat is here to catch them. " "But mice are only imaginary," said the friend. "So are cats," whispered Mrs Brown. Cat and Mouse Mrs Brown went to visit a friend. She is carrying a box with a small hole in the top. "What's in the box?" The friend asked. "A kitten," Mrs. Brown replied. "You know I always dream of mice when I sleep at night. I feel horrible. This cat can catch those mice. " "But mice are imaginary." The friend said. "Kittens are also fictional." Mrs. Brown whispered. I know a man who went fishing in Lake Huron. On his way home by boat, his car broke down. He didn't bring his cell phone. But he thought maybe he could use his maritime radio to call for roadside assistance. He climbed into his boat, turned on the radio and said, "Help, help." A Coast Guard officer came up and said, "Report your position." "Interstate 75, two miles south of standish." After a long time, the policeman asked, "How fast did you get to the shore?" After fishing in Lake Huron, a friend of mine drove home in his boat. The car broke down on the road. He didn't bring his mobile phone, but he thought maybe he could ask for highway assistance by maritime radio. So he climbed into his boat, turned on the wireless device and shouted, "Help, help". A Coast Guard officer responded, "Report your position". Interstate 75, two miles south of standish. After a long silence, the police officer asked my friend, "How fast did your boat go when it landed?" Miser's Party Miser's Party The notorious cheapskate finally decided to invite a guest. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Go up to the fifth floor and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door opens, push it with your foot. " "Why use my elbows and feet?" "Oh, dear," he replied, "you won't come empty-handed, will you?" A notorious cheapskate finally decided to invite a guest. Explaining to a friend how to find his home, he said, "You go up to the fifth floor and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door opens, push it open with your feet. " "Why should I use my elbows and feet?" "My God!" The miser replied, "You won't come empty-handed, will you?" That's even worse: why did you kill for help when you were robbed of your watch? Man: If I open my mouth, they will find my four gold teeth. That's even worse. English: Policeman: Why didn't you call for help when someone robbed your watch? Man: If I open my mouth, they will find my four gold teeth. That would be even worse.