A short essay or joke that requires high school English proficiency.

1. Question: What did zero and eight say when they met in the street?

Answer: Nice belt.

Question: When 0 and 8 meet in the street, what will 0 say to 8?

Answer: Nice belt!

Two snakes are talking. One of them turned to the other and asked, "Are we poisonous?" The other replied, "Yes, why?" "I just bit my tongue."

When two snakes were talking and jumped on their heads, they asked, "Are we poisonous?" The other replied, "Yes, why?" I just want to touch my tongue "

A child said, "Mom, when my father and I were in America this morning, he asked me to give up my seat to a lady." "Well, you did the right thing," mom said. "But I'm sitting on Dad's lap!"

A child told his mother: When my father and I took the bus in the morning, he asked me to give up my seat to a woman. Mom said: You did the right thing! The child continued, but I was sitting on my father's lap. ...

A doctor said to his patient, "I have bad news and worse news." "Oh, honey, what's the bad news?" The patient asked. The doctor replied, "You only have 24 hours to live." "It's terrible," said the patient. "Is there any worse news than this?" The doctor replied, "I have been trying to contact you since yesterday."

The doctor told the patient: I have bad news and worse news. The patient asked, what's the bad news? The doctor said: you can only live for no more than 24 hours. The patient said, "God, that's terrible! What could be worse? " The doctor said, "I've been trying to contact you since yesterday ..."

Joke: Very touching article … even if it is not adopted, I hope everyone who can visit can see this article … in fact, it can be understood without reading Chinese.

Love is a thread (love is a thread)

Sometimes I really doubt whether there is love between my parents. My brother and I are busy making money every day in order to pay the high tuition fees. They won't be as romantic as I saw in books or on TV. In their view, "I love you" is too extravagant for them. Sending flowers on Valentine's Day is even more important. Finally, my father has a bad temper. When he is very tired from hard work, he easily loses his temper.

One day, my mother was sewing a quilt. I sat down beside her silently and looked at her.

After a while, I said, "Mom, I want to ask you a question."

"What?" She replied, still doing her job.

"Is there love between you and dad?" I asked her in a low voice.

My mother stopped her work and looked up, her eyes full of surprise. She didn't answer immediately. Then she lowered her head and continued to sew the quilt.

I am very worried because I think I have hurt her. I am so embarrassed that I don't know what to do. But at last I heard my mother say the following words:

"Susan," she said thoughtfully, "look at this thread. Sometimes it appears, but most of it disappears in the quilt. This thread makes the quilt strong and durable. If life is a quilt, then love is a thread. It's hard to see it anytime and anywhere, but it does exist. Love is inside. "

I listened carefully, but I didn't understand her until the next spring. At that time, my father suddenly became seriously ill. My mother had to stay with him in the hospital for a month. They all looked pale when they came back from the hospital. They both seem to have a serious illness.

After they come back, every morning and evening, my mother will help my father take a slow walk on the country road. My father has never been so gentle. They seem to be the most harmonious couple. Along the country road, there are many beautiful flowers, green grass and trees. The sun shone softly through the leaves. All these make up the most beautiful picture in the world.

The doctor said that my father would recover in two months. But after two months, he still can't walk by himself. We are all worried about him.

"Dad, how do you feel now?" One day I asked him.

"Susan, don't worry about me." He said gently. "To tell you the truth, I just like walking with your mother. I like this life. " Look at his eyes, I know he loves my mother deeply.

I used to think that love meant flowers, gifts and sweet kisses. But from this experience, I understand that love is just a thread in the quilt of our life. Love is inside, making life strong and warm. ..

Sometimes, I really doubt whether there is true love between my parents. They are busy making money and paying my brother and me every day. They never told each other what I read in books or saw on TV. They think saying "I love you" is too extravagant. Not to mention sending flowers on Valentine's Day. My father has a bad temper. He often loses his temper after a hard day's work.

One day, my mother was sewing a quilt, and I sat quietly next to her and looked at her.

After a while, I said, "Mom, I want to ask you a question."

"What's the problem?" As she answered, she continued sewing.

I asked in a low voice, "Is there love between you and dad?"

Mother suddenly stopped what she was doing and looked up in surprise. She didn't answer immediately. Then lower your head and continue to sew the quilt.

I'm afraid I hurt her. I am embarrassed and don't know what to do. But then I heard my mother say, "Susan, look at these lines." Sometimes, you can see it, but most of it is hidden in the quilt. These threads make the quilt strong and durable. If life is like a quilt, then love is the thread. You can't see it anytime and anywhere, but it does exist. Love is internal. "

I listened carefully, but I won't understand her until next spring. At that time, my father was seriously ill. Mother stayed in the hospital for a month. They all looked pale when they came back from the hospital. It's like they're all seriously ill.

After they come back, every morning or evening, my mother will help my father take a walk on the country road. Father has never been so gentle. They are like a couple made in heaven. There are many beautiful wild flowers, green grass and trees beside the path. The sun shines gently on the ground through the cracks in the leaves. All these make up the most beautiful picture in the world.

The doctor said that my father would recover in two months. But after two months, he still can't walk independently. We are all worried about him.

One day, I asked him, "Dad, how do you feel?"

He said softly, "Susan, don't worry about me." I tell you, I like the feeling of walking with your mother. I like this life. "From his eyes, I can see how much he loves his mother.

I used to think that love is flowers, gifts and sweet kisses. But from that moment on, I understood that love is like a thread in the quilt of life. Love is internal, it makes life strong and warm.