If the child has these two behaviors when being beaten, parents should hold back their anger and stop doing it.

When it comes to childhood memories, there are very few childhoods that have not been beaten. Being beaten seems to be a sign of our naughty childhood, but being beaten is not a good memory. It will poke a person's self-esteem and leave a deep psychological haze, especially for children who were often beaten as children. When they grow up, they often have a kind of psychological inferiority that is hard to let go.

In reality, the growth and education of children, many parents have missed the baby stage of babbling in their arms. When the child grows up, it seems that the whole body shows disgusting naughty appearance. In the face of children's various provocations, many parents will go to "spanking education", mainly because spanking education can make children temporarily smart, but spanking education is by no means a good way to calm children down.

The reason why the education of beating and cursing can make children calm down temporarily is because fear and fear have rubbed their spirits. Children are insecure, so they naturally choose to compromise and temporarily calm down by showing weakness. If children live in a cautious environment that is afraid of their parents for a long time, it will have a very serious impact on their growing personality, including psychology.

A friend is famous for his bad temper, especially after giving birth to a child. Every time a child does something wrong, he is in a rage. When a child doesn't want to wash his hair and cry, a friend directly throws water on the child's head with a Yuba. Children cry for no reason when they can't get anything. A friend will beat the child until he stops crying. If he doesn't do his homework carefully, punish him directly or don't let him sleep.

Under the savage education of her friends, her children seem to be obedient, but there are also rebellious and flustered counterattacks behind her introverted personality. This happened on a recent Friday. On that day, the child came home with a test paper, and his friend started nagging. Without saying a few words, the child slammed the door and went home, hurting his leg. It turned out that the child ran away from home too quickly and hit an obstacle on the side of the road.

At that moment, the friends who looked at the scars on the children really panicked. Fortunately, all safety is luck. Beating and scolding education is like drinking poison to quench thirst. It seems to solve the current problem, but it actually makes it worse. Once contradictions accumulate too much, it is difficult to control, and the negative impact of beating and scolding education on children's growth is quite deep.

If the child has the following two performances when being beaten, it shows that the child's psychology has become negative and bad, and parents should refrain from hitting the child even if they are angry again:

1, bowed his head in silence when he was taught a lesson.

Every child is an independent growing individual, and they also have their own personality differences, and personality is often the most authentic psychological feedback. For children with introverted personality and strong self-esteem, they often don't seem to react too aggressively to the education of beating and cursing, but their inner self-esteem makes their temper seem stubborn, especially the feelings of dissatisfaction and injustice will be difficult to evacuate.

After a long time, children are scolded more often, and they are under great pressure, and they are likely to make some impulsive behaviors, which are often the direct manifestations of protests by children and parents. In other words, children are beaten and scolded, and they bow their heads and say nothing. Parents should never be optimistic that children just know that they are wrong, because children who bow their heads often have inferiority and stubborn dignity.

If children have strong self-esteem and are influenced by introverted personality, they often don't communicate when they are in trouble, but hide in their hearts to make themselves uncomfortable. If parents don't communicate with their children much at this time but continue to criticize education, it will not only cut off the parent-child bridge of communication with children, but also make children's negative emotions more negative and even resist their parents in a negative way.

2. Children have strong resistance to their parents.

Introverted personality helps children maintain their self-esteem. If children have a strong sense of resistance to their parents, it shows that they are very dissatisfied with their parents' participation and educational behavior. This sense of resistance is different from the performance of children silently bowing their heads when they are taught a lesson. The difference is that children will fight in a radical way when they encounter problems, and this kind of struggle is not that their temper is too impatient, but that they have too much psychological burden under long-term strict criticism and education, which is given to their children under the continuous investment of parents' beating and scolding education.

In fact, many adults can't be calm about criticism, scolding or too negative language or behavior, let alone underage children. On the contrary, compared with adults, children need more positive energy language to encourage their growth, so as to explore more positive essence of positive energy. Therefore, when the education of beating and cursing makes children have a strong resistance to their parents, parents must pay enough attention to it and never use violence to trigger more negative emotions and behaviors.

Then, how can parents effectively avoid beating and scolding education in children's growth education?

1) Parents should not be absent from family education. If mom's mood is out of control, dad should give more comfort to adjust her mood.

2) Parents should have the same attitude in family education, that is, they should respect their children instead of thinking about how to manage them.

3) Dad loves Mom, and Mom should also care about Dad. Love is the source of happiness and a good agent of family relations.

4) The family atmosphere should be equal, and you can speak freely, and you can summarize and report regularly in the form of "family meetings".

5) implement the system of "family meeting", such as "reporting a temper tantrum, you can get a chance to make another mistake without punishment.

6) If you can't control your emotions, it is recommended to calm down and give your child a space for emotional transition.

7) After calming down, apologize for the shortcomings of the matter itself and guide the children to sum up their mistakes or places that need to be corrected.

8) Comfort children "Everyone will make mistakes, but it is courage and commendable to admit mistakes voluntarily."

9) Encourage children to "don't panic and don't be depressed when encountering problems. I believe that seriousness will lead you to success. "

10) Encourage children that "failure is the mother of success, and making mistakes will make you accumulate more experience and create a better tomorrow."