The lines of the funny sketch "Tong Pak Hu Dian Qiu Xiang"

Starring: Tang Bohu, buddhist nun, Chou-heung, Chou-heung's robber mother.

The first paragraph: Narrator: Dear audience friends, have you heard the sad, touching, romantic and warm story of "Tong Pak Hu Dian Qiu Xiang"? This time, I will bring you an original story of Tang Bohu ordering Chou-heung without any sculpture. The story happened hundreds of years ago. At that time, Comrade Tang Bohu, a leader of the four gifted scholars in the south of the Yangtze River, was elected by a show of hands in the whole village. Please welcome our Comrade Tang Bohu (holding hands with Tang Bohu).

(Tang and his party took the stage) Bohu: (Shake the fan and go up) Taohuawu Taohua Temple, Taohuaan Taohua Fairy; Peach Fairy cultivates peach trees, picks them and drinks them. When I wake up, I just sit in front of the flowers, and when I am drunk, I come to sleep under the flowers; Half drunk and half awake day after day, flowers bloom and fall year after year. I am SHEN WOO, whose reputation is unparalleled in the world. Everyone loves me, flowers bloom, cars have a flat tire, wisdom and beauty coexist, and Tang Bohu is the embodiment of hero and chivalry. I am not only elegant in speech, but also good in quality, which is called a new era ... (Speaking of this follower, let me answer it. )

Waiter: Rice.

Bohu: Huh? Attendant: Oh, no, models. Hey hey, (Tang Bohu was very happy when he heard the first half of the sentence, and very angry when he heard the second half) If my young master is talented, he will be punished, then he will be chopped to pieces; If our master's noble character is a crime, then he is guilty of a heinous crime; If my young master is guilty of being handsome, it can only be a lightning strike.

Bohu: Don't you dare say, I'll hit you.

Attendant: Hey, grandpa, the calendar says you are lucky today?

Bohu: What are you talking about? How can you say that I am lucky today? When do you think I'm unlucky? (below)

The second paragraph: Narrator: One day, Chou-heung just came back from visiting a new store. On the way, a robber blocked the road in Lu Yu. So our Tang Bohu met the peerless beauty Comrade Chou-heung. There is a hero to save the United States, Chou-heung: holding a mobile phone and carrying a satchel into the venue.

Robber: Followed by a man with a baby pacifier in his mouth [sneaking around]

Robber: Stop! I planted this tree and opened this road. If you want to live from now on, stay and buy the fare!

Chou-heung: Will you let me go when that little girl gives you something? [Give the mobile phone to the robber/robber and put it in his pocket]

Robber: wait ... wait, wait, I ... I want to rob ... first.

(Tang Bohu suddenly jumps out from Chou-heung)

Bohu: Sunflower acupuncturist! [Add operation]

Bohu: Bastard dares to rob things in broad daylight. What bad luck to meet me today! Have you watched the news recently? Even if we don't watch the news, listen to the radio or read the newspaper, we can know that the party teaches us to be proud of unity and mutual assistance and ashamed of harming others and benefiting ourselves; Be proud of obeying the law and discipline, and be ashamed of breaking the law and discipline. I despise you women robbers the most. You have no technical content at all. It's sad that you haven't changed your profession after so many years of reform and opening up. Look at you. You are a good player. What's wrong with doing sth? How old are you after being robbed by others? [Go back and ask the robber, the robber's pain ~ yeah ~ twice] I ask you! How old! And a pacifier, damn it! Didn't the aunt in the nursery teach you well [slapped the robber impatiently/still didn't answer]

Chou-heung: Brother ~ ~ You seem to have hit his point.

Bohu: Ah ~ I almost saw it, sunflower acupuncturist [plus action]

Robber: Oh, big brother, stop it. I dare say that your Tang people speak so well. You and Tang Priest were born by the same mother, right? I dare not do it again. It really kills people.

Bohu: What are you talking about? Avalanche! [Add operation]

(under the robber)

Chou-heung: I'm afraid I will ...

Bohu: You're welcome, girl.

Chou-heung: Your son is very handsome. May I ask your name?

Bohu: My surname is Tang and my name is Bohu. What's the girl's name?

Chou-heung: Call me Chou-heung.

Oh, what a beautiful name. Please allow me to take this girl home next time.

Chou-heung: Then you have to work hard.

Bo Hu, Chou-heung walks around the stage, pretending to chat. )

Buddhist nun: When love came, my young master was suddenly enlightened. His waist and legs no longer hurt, and his rheumatism and internal injuries have all recovered for many years.

Chou-heung: Son, my home is here.

Bohu: Unfortunately, I have to say goodbye again. Contact me often in the future. Be sure to send me a message. I am a M-Zone user, my site, and I am in charge!

Chou-heung: Mine is the' Tianyi' of telecommunications, which is covered on the ground and underground! But video. (Under Chou-heung, Bohu is still watching Chou-heung leave stupidly)

Buddhist nun: Sister Chou-heung turned around.

Bohu: Tai Sen changed to table tennis.

Buddhist nun: Sister Chou-heung turned around.

Bohu: Yang Guo fell in love with Li Moqiu.

Buddhist nun: Sister Chou-heung turned three times.

Bohu: Monks used ladle meat from now on. Hey, you're kidding!

Paragraph 3: Narrator: A few days later, Tang Bohu went to Chou-heung's house to propose marriage (Chou-heung and Qiu Mu are the same as above).

(Bohu comes to Qiumu)

Akiki: What's your last name? Why are you so harsh? Bohu: The surname is Tang, Bohu is a man.

Chou-heung: Tang Bohu, mom.

Akiki: (stands up angrily) Tang Baihuo, right?

Bohu: Yahao, Yahao, hehe.

Akiki: I heard that you know a lot about talents and the past, don't you?

Bohu: Brother closed it.

Akiki: There are countless girls, aren't there?

Bohu: That won't do. I'm still single-minded about love.

Akiki: Madam, can I test you today?

Bohu: Ah, ah.

Akiki: Outside the Qingshan Building outside the mountain.

Bohu: When will the singing and dancing in the West Lake stop? Akiki: Oh, boy, you are very talented.

You were a tailor in your last life, right?

Bohu: I don't want to. Who told God to give me a face that can conquer women?

Akiki: Ah, sad! Which ancient man in China ran fastest?

Bohu: Cao Cao.

Akiki: Why?

Bohu: Speak of the devil! Akiki: Which company in Zigong has the most beautiful girl?

Bohu: Ha, telecommunications. Akiki: God, that's so touching. Bohu, you are a real man! Well, it seems that you can stand the test. It's not impossible for you to marry Chou-heung, but you can't just marry my daughter empty-handed.

Bohu: Oh, I see, auntie. Look, this is the latest Tianyi mobile phone from Telecom. You can watch TV movies online and make video calls. And it's very cheap, only 9 cents a minute for local calls. (After that, the insidious smile told the audience what she thought. Actually, I didn't spend a penny on this thing. It's my broadband, and the telecom gave me a voucher, hahahaha. )

Akiki: Well, it seems that you really like Chou-heung. You have taken great pains to make my old lady happy. You know what? Pick an auspicious day and let you two get married. (After that, I excitedly went to play with my mobile phone) Chou-heung: I'm getting married soon. I'm shy ... (burying his face and running off the stage)

Bohu: God, earth, finally let aunt angel open her eyes! Xiao Qiang, you finally have a mistress! (Chasing Chou-heung)