What are the jokes in idioms?

01. A bear is coming and be prepared (BEAR is coming)

02. The eleventh book is incredible (BOOK11)

03. Which A kind of bat that doesn’t need to rest and is slovenly (Never-ending bat)

04. Xiaoyu said to Xiaoming that her father is impotent and can’t stop (Yu’s father can’t)

05. The sheep stopped breathing and was elated (the sheep didn’t Exhale)

06. Don’t drop your cell phone in the toilet, don’t lose it (wet)

07. The dog will stop barking after crossing the single-plank bridge.

08. The bee stops on the calendar and the wind is sunny (Beehe Calendar)

09. A group of people throw eggs at the gun and a hail of bullets (gun rains eggs)

< p>10. Painters like to draw thick ropes but not thin ropes to achieve perfection (thick ropes enter the painting)

11. Eating with chopsticks is popular (chopsticks to the crowd)

12. Two A man sits on a stone and kills two birds with one stone

13. There are ten sheep, nine squatting in the sheep pen, and one squatting in the pig pen (one sheep squats wrong)

14. The sheep calls the eagle, and the eagle picks up the phone and says "Hello" (sheep PHONE the eagle "hello")

15. If the hat is dirty, turn it over and wear it again (wear it with the crown inside)

16. Ten men watch five women taking a colorful shower

17. Whose house doesn’t have a phone? Tianyi (Tianyi seamless phone)

18. Who knows the birds best? Frightened Bird (Frightened Bird) Zhiniao

19. Why do male horses run faster than females? Hurry up

20. Why has the teacher told us to cherish the four arrows since childhood? Time flies (four arrows)

21. How to prevent ducks from flying away? Give it a wing (it’s hard to fly with wings)

22. How to make a sparrow quiet? Squeeze it (pressing the bird makes no sound)

23. Which kind of snake has many mouths? Talkative (snake)

24. Which kind of juice is the most difficult to drink? racking one's brains

25. Why don't men go out? Because when you go out, you become a layman

26. Why is "seven up and eight down" seven above eight? Because eight is below seven

27. Which kind of snake has the strongest vitality? Eternal Tongue (Snake)

28. Why is there only the tip of the iceberg? The other corner was broken off by the Titanic

29. How heavy are stars? 8 grams (starbucks eight grams)

30. What medicine is not poisonous? Yam

31. Who is the most difficult person to date? Lily, because everything (Lily) works hard

2: I once suffered from schizophrenia, but now we have recovered.

3: An international student was taking a driver’s license test in the United States. The road sign in front of him told him to turn left. He was not sure and asked the examiner:

“Turn left?”

Answer : "right."

So... it hung up.

It seems that I saw an idiom joke told by Li Ao in September last year. I have edited it a little and retell it to make friends laugh:

"Hypocrisy and subterfuge"

< p>The idiom "Yí" means that although you don't agree with someone's request or opinion, you don't want to refuse it outright, but instead adopt a perfunctory and prevaricating attitude to deal with it.

It is said that Ouyang Xiu and Wang Gongchen (Yike) were Jinshi in the same year, and they were both sons-in-law of Xue Jiansu; Ouyang Xiu married Xue's eldest daughter, and Wang Gongchen married Xue's second daughter. Later, Ouyang Xiu was widowed and remarried Xue San's daughter. A friend joked: "The old son-in-law becomes the new son-in-law, and the uncle becomes the younger uncle."

The son of Wang Gongchen’s family was first called Ouyang Xiu’s uncle, and later he was called his younger uncle. One day, the children of the Wang family visited a snake seller in the market. In order to attract customers, the snake seller first took out the big snake and played with it, and then took out the small snake and played with it. At that time, the child of the Wang family remembered that there was a phrase "Xu Yu Wei Snake" in a section of "Zhuangzi. Ying Diwang", and he casually said that it was "Xu Yu Wei 'snake' (shé)"; a scholar nearby corrected him and said, "Snake" is not read here. (shé)', should be read as 'snake (yí)', should be read as "virtual and wei snake (yí)".

After the Wang family's child returned home, he said to Wang Gongchen: "There is a 'snake (yí)' seller in the market. He plays with the big 'snake (yí)' first, and then with the small 'snake (yí)'."

The fish in the restaurant is not fresh, it is simply "rotten fish".

The most fearful thing about riding a motorcycle on a rainy day is the "splash" from the car in front of you.

The Chinese discovered that the earth is round, so they went in the opposite direction.

For some people who are drunk and dreaming of life and death, we describe him as----time is like "cheap".

The reason for buying a counterfeit Rolex is to show off its “look”.

The feeling of being with someone who foams at the mouth is that talking too much will make you "wet".

Motorcycle thieves are running rampant, and the public security situation has turned red. It’s true that there is also “theft” in the “Tao”.

There are so many green beans on his face that we call him ---- "Feng" who is full of youth.

After most pen pals meet, they always fall in love at first sight.

The feeling of seeing Ye Zimei is ---- rough waves.

For those who play the Pai Qi game and cannot get a spade, we will ---- warn "Peach Seven"

Blue knives and blue guns - invulnerable (blue)

A man in golden clothes——a frightened (gold) man

The number "3" walked on the road, turned somersaults, and then Then I turned over one - the answer: three times and twice

A dog stopped barking after crossing a single-plank bridge - the answer: photographic memory (woof)

Tenth A book——Unbelievable(book11)

A cow, a dog, a pig, and a sheep are racing. After reaching the finish line, the cow, dog, and pig are panting. Only the sheep is not panting———feeling proud (the sheep is not breathing)

A bee stung on the calendar——Feng (bee) and Rili (calendar)

A bear came over——come prepared (come with bear)

The sheep calls the eagle——Yangfeng (sheep phone) Yinbiao (eagle: "Hey")

Which kind of bat does not need to rest——-the unkempt (non-resting bat) )

Don’t drop your cell phone into the toilet - don’t miss the opportunity (wet)

A group of people smashed eggs at guns - a hail of bullets (guns raining eggs)

Eating with chopsticks - popular (chopsticks to the population)

There are ten sheep, nine squatting in the sheep pen and one squatting in the pig pen - cadence (one sheep squats wrong )

Oh my gosh, this is the only one in the whole area that hasn’t installed a phone————It’s perfect(God——一无PHONE)

Why do you have to turn the hat inside out before wearing it—— ——Zhang Guan Li Dai (Dirty Guan Li Dai)

No matter whether the duck is cooked or not, if you give it enough conditions, it will not fly away——It is difficult to fly with wings (Give it a wing)< /p>

The eunuch talked------------------nonsense.

1. Knowledge of books and gift-giving: It is not enough to know only book knowledge, you must also learn to give gifts;

2. Live like a year: Life is very easy, every day is like celebrating the New Year;

3. A drop in the bucket: drink tea every day in the office, and you can get a full salary at the end of the month;

4. Be content with what you have: knowing someone asks you to wash your feet, you feel happy in your heart;

5. Change your mind when you see something different: When you see a beautiful person of the opposite sex, you want to move to her;

6. Speak with seriousness: Others speak seriously and hold grudges in your heart for a long time;

< p>7. Take advantage of opportunities: There are planes that you can take when you go out for inspection;

8. Without learning and skills: don’t waste your time learning things that are not practical;

9. Husband sings and wife follows: When the husband entered the karaoke bar, his wife followed him

One day, the court heard a divorce case in public.

I saw that the man was quite creative and had an unforgettable memory, while the woman was Twenty-eight years old, beautiful and charming...

It turned out that the man really didn't want to divorce, but the woman was more determined. She might be killed in the court if she didn't divorce today. Before the trial, the two men had a unique debate in the court, the content of which was roughly as follows:

The man first stated: "Your Honor, I am a talented man with a handsome appearance. Tangtang, as a role model of the generation, fell in love with her at first sight and vowed to stay together forever. Not only that, but I also have a lot of skills. Every spring night, I always responded to her and hit it off immediately. Looking back on my wedding night, I Zhu Qingtian, she accomplished everything in one go, became a blockbuster, and moved forward thousands of miles. Although she did not become an instant hit, I still treat her equally. That night of lingering is truly unforgettable for me. Your Honor, my dear judges, what I say below is true. Please make a clear decision."

At this time, the woman couldn't bear it anymore and said angrily: "Your honor, members of the jury, please don't be fooled by his one-sided words. He is a beast in disguise. Nonsense, he was just trying to satisfy his own selfish desires. At home, he was everything but money. Looking back on the wedding night, it was even more difficult to explain. Fortunately, I helped him, but it was also full of twists and turns. , can't be reached in one move, I can only see that he is stuck, but he is on the verge of breaking out, fleeting, and then plummeting, finally defeated, dying, simply worthless, thinking that I was completely innocent, back then. It’s such a mistake to make such a mistake, please let us break it up.”