Ask for a good cell phone joke (one for everyone, it's useless to write too much, it's not yellow)

▲ I ran into you and was at a loss. I can't avoid your affectionate eyes. I know your heart. I ran as fast as I could, but you followed me closely. I cried, "Whose dog is nobody's business?"

I dreamed of you last night: we walked by the river and snuggled together. You looked up at my eyes and spit out three words affectionately ... woof woof woof. ...

● The crow said: I am burning charcoal in the swan; The sparrow said: I am an opium smoker among peacocks; The parrot said: I am the one sitting on the stage among the swallows; The roast duck said, I set myself on fire.

[2] nausea:

▲ Give you a gift with the heaviest amount of feces since there was feces. You will eat a catty and be full. If you feel that the amount of feces is not enough, please help yourself!

◆ Who has no shit in his life and whose shit doesn't use paper? If you don't use toilet paper, are you using your fingers?

[3] Adults:

▲ A Japanese competition lineup: male players are Masao Kamikawa and Ichiro Kojiro, and female players are Kyoko Yokai and Takoko Jianjun. The referee is South Korean socio-economic tycoon Park Sung-sung.

A nun went to the hospital for a B-ultrasound, and the careless nurse gave her a pregnant woman's test sheet. After reading it, the nun sighed and said, "These days, even carrots are unreliable."

● "Is it tight?" "Never mind!" "Can you go in a little more?" "Be careful, it should work!" "Does it hurt?" "It doesn't hurt! It feels so cool! Just buy this pair. "

[4] Love category:

▲ We should miss every day, but don't meet each other every day. I am in charge of beauty, and you are in charge of making money. You can love someone else, but don't let me find out. If I meet you, hum ... cook noodles with rat poison!

Seeing this message, you owe me a hug; Delete this message and owe me a kiss; Save this message and owe me an appointment; If you reply, you owe me everything; If you don't reply, you are mine.

Lovely you stole my love and my heart, and I decided to go to court? After the judge searched all the records and cases, the jury unanimously passed: sentence you to accompany me for life!

[5] belittle human beings:

▲ I heard that you were trafficked, which really scared me. Although you grew up with dementia, it is harmless to society. Who is so bold as to dare to sell you? I'm worried about him. It's strange to sell it!

◆ Do you know? I have been secretly in love with you, missing your face, your lips, your tongue and your ears, but I am too poor to confess. Now that I have money, I can say loudly, "Boss, cut that pig head in half for me".

Honey, you know what? You have lost a lot of weight recently! I see it in my eyes, but it hurts in my heart. It's almost the Spring Festival, but your health is worrying ... who doesn't want to let their pigs kill a few kilograms more!

[6] All mankind:

▲ Congratulations on winning the grand prize. Please come to the People's Bank of China with sabre, shotgun and soil cannon at 10 this evening.

◆ Naturally useful, but I can't understand it! One day, Wang Di woke up from a dream. Get up at eight tomorrow morning, and he will understand after eating the cake (you will be surprised if you try to read the third word of each sentence).

● Warning: Hello! Because your mobile phone is ugly and outdated, which seriously affects the city appearance, we decided to send a signal to destroy it.

[7] The world:

▲ On a crowded bus, a girl suddenly shouted: Don't crowd! Stop squeezing! Squeeze all the milk out! She is holding yogurt.

◆ A public toilet couplet: heroes all over the world bow their heads and bend their knees here; A virtuous woman, a virgin in the world, came in to untie the bandwidth skirt; Horizontal approval: heaven and earth are upright.

● Director: Hello, comrades! Soldier: Hello, sir! The chief patted a soldier's chest and said, how well this muscle is trained! Soldier: Sir, I'm a female soldier.

[8] Fool:

▲ I wrote your name in the sky, but it was taken away by the wind; Write your name on the beach, but it is swept away by the waves; Write your name in the street, but I was taken away by the police

◆ A farmer asked a veterinarian to breed pigs, and the veterinarian said: It seems that artificial breeding is needed. The farmer hesitated for a long time, summoned up his courage and said, yes, I'm afraid it will bite me.

[9] blessing class:

▲ Send you a snack: first floor, considerate! Second floor, care! Third floor, romantic! Fourth floor, warm! Sandwiches, great! I wish you a good mood every day!

◆ With the coming of the New Year, I wish you smooth sailing, two dragons take off, three sheep open Thailand, four seasons of peace, five blessings, Datong, seven stars shine high, and all directions come to make money, and 99 is United and perfect.

● I wish you good health, and your teeth are almost gone; Bon voyage, missing halfway; Go the whole way, give up halfway; Happy every day, often abnormal; Laugh often, laugh anyway!