Do not please yourself.

For the rest of your life, please don't please, don't explain and don't insist.

Bu roughage 68

2021-10-1417: 56 writer, member of Hunan Writers Association, creator in emotional field, and energetic creator.

watch out for

0 1

Why do more and more people like being alone?

Because, only when you are alone can you be yourself and isolate yourself from the world.

In order to live, we always please others, but forget to please ourselves.

For the rest of my life, I don't like it, I don't explain it, I don't insist, even if no one appreciates it, it's still a landscape.

02

Please don't.

I like this passage very much: "Don't chase a horse, you use the time of chasing a horse to plant grass, and when spring blossoms, you can attract a group of good horses for you to choose from." Don't try to curry favor with a person, use the time when you have no friends for the time being to improve your ability. When the time is ripe, a group of friends will accompany you. "

If you bow your head to please others, hypocritical people will like you and sincere people will hate you. However, what's the use of flattering a hypocritical person?

I'm afraid few people deserve your flattery except your parents.

A minister in the Qing Dynasty said, "The kneecaps of westerners are straight and will not bend."

That is to say, westerners are arrogant in front of China people, and they will not kneel when they meet ministers and senior officials, and they will also disdain when they meet the emperor. In the minister's view, it is really hard to understand that westerners have knee problems, not that they are arrogant.

Grow the ambition of others and destroy yourself. It can be seen.

The people you please must be people who love you very much, not people who look down on you, not people who are self-righteous.

If you wronged yourself, you can touch yourself, but you may not be able to touch others.

One of my colleagues buys breakfast for people in the office every day. One day, when he had too many things to do, he forgot. As a result, three colleagues in the same office said that he "didn't remind me earlier, which was really not enough."

Well-intentioned things turned out to be "shooting themselves in the foot". After a breakfast, I offended my colleagues, and I was not a person inside and outside. I could only bow my head and say "I'm sorry" to everyone.

In fact, it is someone else who wants to say "I'm sorry", not someone who buys breakfast every day.

You can please others once, but you can't please others all your life, otherwise you will indulge others.

The real ingratiation is to be yourself and make yourself radiant and valuable. You are useful to yourself. If you don't please anyone, you won't have no friends.

Yi Shu said: "Life is only a few decades. The most important thing is to satisfy yourself, not to please others. "

Please yourself, it will really get better. Most of the people around you are people who exchange interests. Seeing the essence of interpersonal communication clearly, you will find that everyone can stand up straight and be a man.

03

No explanation.

When I was in junior high school, a classmate said, "I met a strange bird on the road with a big head and a big body."

Later, this incident was regarded as a joke by the whole class.

How can there be such a strange bird in this world? Generally speaking, the heads of all the birds we have seen are smaller than their bodies.

The classmate tried his best to explain, and then the classmate tried his best to laugh at it. The atmosphere was very awkward.

On the second day of junior high school, in biology class, the teacher said, "There is a bird in the Philippines with a big head, that is, its mouth accounts for one-third of its body, which makes people feel top-heavy. Of course, in China, there are some birds with big heads. For example, the owl's head is very big, which can be bigger than a human face. "

No one ever made fun of this classmate again.

It turns out that making fun of others is ignorance; Explanations are also redundant.

There is a saying in the novel "Looking at the World": "People who believe in you will understand you without explanation, and will never doubt you just by hearing the wind. If you don't believe me, it's no use explaining. A word from others can make everything go up in smoke. "

Smart people, be yourself, don't explain-clear is clear, turbid is turbid.

Someone misunderstood, saying that it is useless to say more, and there is the possibility of adding insult to injury. If you are impatient, you will say the wrong thing, and others will seize the conversation.

Your injury, only you know best. When you explain your pain to others, you just want others to sympathize with you, but what you say only hurts yourself again and again, and does not spread the pain. Others laugh at your vulnerability behind your back.

Others are not interested in your experience. No matter how wonderful your story is, others only pay attention to themselves.

Explain, it's a lot. It is best to be silent and not respond to others. Learn to know yourself and live in peace with yourself, as free as the wind.

04

Don't force it.

The Tao Te Ching says, "Man should be anywhere, the land should follow the sky, the sky should follow the Tao, and the Tao should be natural."

Laozi told us that letting nature take its course is the "Tao" and respecting the law of the development of things is the best way to live.

There is a philosophical story.

The active Zen master asked Master Huihai, "What is the secret of cultivation?"

Huihai said, "I want to eat when I am hungry and sleep when I am sleepy."

I don't understand actively: "Everyone is like this. What's the difference?"

Hui Hai said: "Most people are picky about food when they eat, think when they sleep, and always care."

Wake up the dreamer in one word.

How can we live a good life if we have food, but we can't eat well, and we can sleep, but we can't?

In the final analysis-you want too many things.

If a person lacks a heart, he will pursue more things and then lose happiness.

It is not husband and wife who are tied together; Twisted melons are not sweet; The work I don't want to do is annoying; The scenery I don't like is disgusting; People you don't like are an eyesore. ......

Let go of desire, respect the law of development of things, and then follow the trend, and life is already very good.

In this life, there is nothing you can always have. It's all outside your body.

You don't have to force others to agree with you; Your desire cannot override your ability; Don't force others to understand your mood.

Writer Bing Xin said: "But be innocent. This body is like dirt and dust, and the world has become nothingness. "

Understand that no one cherishes your flattery; Your explanation is superfluous; What you insist on is doomed to be unattainable.

Try to be yourself, without interfering with others, and you don't owe anything.