Why do many mothers get tired of their mother-in-law holding the baby after the baby is born?

After the baby is born, many mothers are tired of their mother-in-law holding the baby for many reasons: First, they feel that the mother-in-law is unhygienic and often kisses the baby's face or even mouth. This is the most intolerable and disgusting thing for many new mothers, because there are many bacteria in the mouth. What should I do if it is transmitted to the baby? There have been news reports abroad: Newborns were infected with herpes because they were kissed by others.

Second, I feel that the mother-in-law’s posture when holding the baby is incorrect, and she is afraid that it will have an adverse effect on the fragile newborn. Many elders like to hold their children in their arms and rock them, which is actually very dangerous. Poor control of strength may lead to baby swing syndrome; there are also many elders who like to pinch their babies to make them stand, which is not suitable for babies. Standing up too early is not good for bone development.

Third, the mother-in-law always says some inexplicable words when holding the baby. The most common words are: "Your mother doesn't want you anymore, so you can live with your grandma." This sentence is the most intolerable, even if it is a joke, I don't like it. The mother-in-law may think it is a casual joke, and the baby may not understand it. But the daughter-in-law, who had just become a mother, felt a little uncomfortable after hearing this. She felt that her mother-in-law was trying to provoke a close relationship between her and her baby.

Fourth, I am worried that my mother-in-law will feed the baby indiscriminately. Nowadays, scientific parenting is emphasized. Generally, babies are not introduced to complementary foods until they are five to six months old. Before, babies were exclusively fed breast milk or formula milk. But some mothers-in-law don't pay attention to this, and secretly feed their children vegetable soup, some sweets, etc., thinking that this is good for the child and that this is how to be close to the child. Little did they know that this was objectionable to new mothers.

Fifth, I am worried that the mother-in-law will be malicious to the baby. It is often reported in the news that some grandmothers do not like their granddaughters and insert needles into their children. This kind of news is really horrifying to watch.

But the root cause is the lack of trust and communication between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. From the perspective of a new mother, after giving birth to a baby, the changes in hormones in the body make the new mother emotionally unstable and more sensitive. I believe that most mothers-in-law are kind to their babies in their hearts. New mothers still need to communicate with them more about their parenting concepts. Through communication, they can understand what scientific parenting is like.

From the mother-in-law’s point of view, she still needs to respect her daughter-in-law’s parenting style and learn new scientific parenting knowledge with an open mind. After all, the starting point is for the good of the baby. Don’t always talk about “how you raised your children in the past. Why can’t it work now?”