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How to deal with cold and violent men and make cold and violent men regret
In our daily lives, if a man uses cold violence against you, you must tell him clearly and directly. Don’t blame yourself and regret. A cold-violent man will continue to be violent. You must Let him calm down and let him learn to communicate with you.
How to deal with cold and violent men
1. Create an environment to deal with cold and violent men
If your man has a tendency to be cold and violent, do not choose the color of the walls. For those with cool colors, you should choose warm colors such as orange and light yellow, abandon metallic glass and white lights, and choose a warm decoration style, which will have a subtle effect on your mood.
2. Use timely humor to deal with cold and violent men
Usually collect humorous jokes. When a man has a tendency to be cold and violent, you can send some humor, jokes, fun text messages and emails to the other party. . Prepare a humorous cartoon at home showing you or him showing his teeth and claws, with a big STOP written on it and a big cross drawn on it. When a man verbally insults you, you can use it to stop him.
3. Sensational bombing to deal with coldly violent men
When a man is coldly violent, he can use all the power at his disposal, such as sending cards, flowers and gifts. When sending text messages or emails, you can recall the sweet times in the past and express your admiration for him that is as continuous as a surging river.
4. Use external force to deal with cold and violent men
Those who don’t have a baby can have a baby. If you don’t want to borrow the baby, you can borrow the other parent’s parents. If the other parent is unreasonable, you can borrow a man’s friend. In short, you can borrow whatever is useful.
5. The best way to deal with cold-violent men
If you encounter any type of cold-violence from a man, you can just pack up and go for a leisurely stroll. What contact will you make in the meantime? The way is interrupted so that he doesn't know where you are and what you are doing. In the process of thinking about you, come back suddenly, as if nothing happened, give him the gift he wants most, hug and kiss him.
6. Crying bitterly when dealing with cold and violent men
If you suddenly sob alone as if you have encountered a huge disaster, you must express your true feelings. If you can’t cry, think about what you have seen before. The worst movie, the worst experience I have ever encountered. The time must last long enough, until he can't bear it. When he wants to comfort you, tell him that you can't help but cry when you think of him dying and leaving you alone. The effect is absolutely great!
7. Cultivate new interests to deal with cold and violent men
When a woman gets married, her heart hangs on the man’s neck. But when this man is cold and violent towards you, your heart will immediately fall off the cliff. You are not afraid of not having money or food and clothing, but you are afraid that your spirit will have no sustenance and you will become a living dead. In fact, after a woman suffers from domestic cold violence, she can try to develop new interests and divert her attention. In this way, perhaps the pain of domestic cold violence will be less and the happiness will be more.
8. Be indifferent to worldly affairs and deal with cold and violent men
As the saying goes: "Ten years of cultivation can make you live in the same boat, and a hundred years of cultivation can help you sleep on the same pillow." This is true. But when a woman encounters a man's cold violence, she should stay and watch the clouds roll and relax in the sky, watch the flowers bloom and fall in front of the court without being surprised. Although couples are together because of fate, but when your fate is not separated, you should look down on the relationship between men and women. In fact, many words in the Buddhist scriptures are correct. Don’t force anything. Women should not live their whole lives for a man and a love, but should live a wonderful life for themselves.
9. Divorce decisively to deal with coldly violent men
If a woman who encounters cold domestic violence feels that there is no hope of reconciliation, she can only choose divorce to resolve it. Men's cold violence to women is like encountering an emperor's concubine who has been thrown into the cold palace. There is no emotional hope and sustenance. The warm family is no longer replaced by a prison like an ice cellar. Since there is no affection left between the couple, it would be better to just get a divorce. Why should husband and wife become enemies or strangers? It is better to get together and stay apart easily.
Make a coldly violent man regret
First: Let him calm down
If he really has been treating you with cold violence, you should not go The more you pester him and coax him, the more he will treat you with the same cold violence next time.
You must keep him calm. The more he treats you with such cold violence, the less you should coax him. This is the weakness of a cold and violent man. You have to keep him calm. If he really likes you, he will definitely not treat you with cold violence because he is afraid that you will leave him. In fact, men sometimes like to use cold violence because girls are accustomed to it, because once he uses cold violence, you will try to make him happy. In this case, he actually wants you to coax him more, and he will He will treat you with cold violence, so if a man treats you with cold violence, you must let him calm down.
Second: Live your own life, don’t be too attached to him
If a woman does not have her own interests and hobbies and always relies on a man, then this girl’s life must be Of little value. A woman must cultivate multiple hobbies and make herself an independent person. Such a woman will not be affected by a man's every move. Even if a man uses cold violence against her, she will not feel that she has lost the world. If a woman has her own career and her own hobbies, then this kind of person will be very happy no matter who she is with. If a man treats her with cold violence, she won't worry about losing everything. But if you don't care about me, I won't care about you either. If you really love me, you won't use it frequently. Cold violence is used against people. As long as after using cold violence once, you make this man realize that using cold violence will bring about the consequences of losing you, then he will definitely not continue to use this kind of cold violence. Therefore, if your man has been using cold violence, you should think carefully about whether there is something wrong with you, so that he is not afraid of losing you at all? This is a question worth considering.
Third: Really leave him
A man will treat you with cold violence. He probably needs more care from you, just like a child who needs more. People go to coax him. At this time, if you want this man to stop treating you with cold violence, you can say leave him. If he doesn't care about you, then he probably won't look for you. If he really loves you, he will definitely get rid of this cold and violent habit and let you come back to him. This is the weakness of a cold and violent man. If he really loves you, he is really afraid that you will leave him.
Dealing with cold violence in relationships
One: Learn to accept the status quo
No one wants to be cold at home, including him who is committing cold violence. Many people fall into victim mode, accusing men of being indifferent to them. Negative emotions are generally dominant, but often the problem is not solved, but the relationship is further deteriorated. The first step to change is to accept it. Don't have too much emotional attachment and sustenance, and don't always compare the previous two people's feelings. Learn to accept the other person's change of heart and the crisis of the current relationship, let go of emotions and right and wrong, and surrender to the present moment.
Two: Calm introspection and self-observation
Cold violence in relationships does not happen out of nowhere. It must be that there is something wrong with the management of the two people. After you learn to accept it, you need to calm down and reflect on what caused it. In particular, we need to analyze what are the men's psychological demands and inner emotions? Clarify the ideas and analyze them one by one, which ones are their own problems, which ones are communication problems between the two parties, which ones are caused by family conflicts, etc. Regarding your own problems, you need to face up to changes.
Three: Do your emotional role well
Many people tend to fall into the mode of resenting women when they are subjected to cold violence by their significant other. If a woman responds to a man with negative emotions, the relationship will become worse and worse. Let go of your emotions, insist on self-improvement, and release your own emotional role value. You must continue to do what you should do, and work hard to do better. This is the prerequisite for guiding the other party to change. After all, don't do to others what you don't want others to do to you.
Four: Properly conduct emotional and in-depth communication
When you understand the problem and the reason for the cold violence with the other party, you must choose an opportunity to have an in-depth communication and emotional communication with the other party. . On the one hand, calm down and communicate with the other party about the current problems in the relationship in a non-emotional way, and at the same time, guide the other party to speak out their thoughts and dissatisfaction. If it is your own problems that cause the other person's emotions and misunderstanding, then you should also be appropriately affectionate and apologize appropriately. You should also express some of your inner feelings and demands, guide the other party out of indifference and alienation, and discuss how to solve the problem together.
At this time, the effectiveness of communication depends largely on the degree of cooperation of the other party. Therefore, you should not be in a hurry. Even if the conversation is not ideal, you should not have too many emotions and demands. You should give the other party time to digest and ease it slowly with patience and sincerity.
Five: Language Expression of Love
Once you understand the reasons and psychological appeal of the other person’s cold violence, you can create more language expressions of love in future interactions. For example, you can use birthdays, wedding anniversaries, or children to create opportunities to express your feelings for him, so that he can slowly relax his guard against you, gradually eliminate his negative emotions, and finally accept your love and let him Feelings heat up. Cold violence in relationships is not terrible. What is terrible is our blind panic and too many imaginary dramas. If we do our part well and slowly guide the other person, we will be able to successfully overcome the emotional crisis.
What is cold violence?
It means that when a conflict occurs between a couple or a couple, both parties or the other party do not face the problem directly and do not communicate effectively in a timely manner, but adopt passive avoidance. , deal with it by ignoring it, and treat your other half by ignoring it, not asking, not listening, etc.
1. Cold violence is different from normal domestic violence.
It is more inclined to mental alienation and torture, "sanctioning" the other party's psychology, which lasts longer and causes great harm. Over a long period of time, the other half will fall into depression, low mood, etc., and the relationship will appear to be inseparable, and in the end it can only end in tragedy.
2. In relationships, women are often more likely to face domestic cold violence.
Because in the way of handling intimate relationships, women are more emotional and like to talk and vent. However, when men are faced with dissatisfaction with their partner but are unable to change, they often choose an avoidant attitude and put their inner feelings Dissatisfaction with the other half turns into cold violence.
There are 4 typical common forms of cold violence in relationships:
1: Indifferent, ignoring
Almost zero communication, unwillingness Talk to your partner, do your own thing, and treat the other person as nothing.
2: Verbal cynicism
This type is to convert negative energy into words, often saying things that the other party does not want to hear and putting the other party in a bad state.
3: Often come home late or even not go home
I don’t want to face people at home, so I usually use excuses such as playing cards, gatherings with friends, working overtime, etc. to come home late.
4: Stop investing emotionally
Stop investing in financial responsibility, child rearing, marital life, etc., and no longer want to take on the responsibilities of being a husband or boyfriend. When faced with men's cold violence, women often feel very hurt, accompanied by a strong sense of powerlessness and pain. On the one hand, they don't want to give up the relationship they have been working on for many years, but on the other hand, they don't know how to ease the current impasse.
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