What are the interesting features of football?

The 2022 World Cup is coming, and 10 jokes about football have been carefully arranged, adding some elements of staying up late to watch the ball. Sit in the wrong position. This is just a joke. I didn't mean to "hack anyone".

In the next World Cup, the number of participating teams will be expanded from 32 to 48. FIFA especially wants China to enter the World Cup, which is tacit. I hope China can see you in the next World Cup! !

1, once a black national football team,1.300 million can't find 1 1 who can play football. Now I know I was wrong, because six billion foreign countries haven't found three who can play table tennis.

2. The goalkeeper said to the players of his team, "You know, when I was guarding the goal, I often thought that it would be great if the ball could become as big as the goal and the goal could become as small as the ball ..."

3, national football investment skills: If you can start from 1990, in every national football game, as long as you take out a small sum of 1000 yuan, the more the better, never buy and win, just gamble and lose! Then you are a millionaire now, with about 4.59 million remitted to your account. Not every kind of milk is called Telunsu, but there is a team that can lose. National football financing is worth having! Haha _

4. I have seen that the national football team can come back to life: everything is relative, and others are spraying the national football team! I want to thank him for saving the life of a friend of mine. My buddy had a car accident last year and was hit into a vegetable. He has been in a coma in the hospital, and the doctor said there is no hope of waking up!

Even so, one day, when a little nurse came to take care of him, she happened to turn on the TV, and at this time, the national football match was just going on. My buddy miraculously woke up! Get up and turn off the TV!

On the deathbed of 5.20xx, an old man said to his grandson with trembling lips, "When the children …… wait … China football … qualify, you must … write … on paper … and burn it for me. I am also happy below. " The child said, "Don't worry, Grandpa, I will try my best to live to that day." Grandpa closed his eyes with satisfaction after listening to his grandson.

I heard that your brother plays for the national team? B: Your brother just played for the national team! Your whole family plays for the national team!

7. What is the star effect? -Ronaldo retired, and Brazilian football has not recovered for 8 years; Zidane retired and French football 12 did not recover; Baggio retired, and Italian football did not slow down on 16; Cruyff retired, and Dutch football has not slowed down for more than 20 years; Puskas retired, and Hungarian football has not recovered for more than 30 years; Golf retired, China football has not recovered for more than a thousand years!

8.M: I have tickets. Shall we go to the football match today? Woman: Forget it. I can't read it. I don't even know what offside means.

M: For example, if my suitor, your rival in love, is a goalkeeper and we attack her together, when you pass the ball to me, you find that I am closer to your rival in love than anyone else, then I am offside.

9. An athlete is determined to become a tennis star. After practicing for half a year, the coach shook his head and said, "Your physical fitness is too poor to play tennis."

So he went to play basketball. Half a year later, the basketball coach told him, "Your confrontational ability is too poor to play basketball."

He thought about it and thought that table tennis should be the most suitable for him, so he went to learn table tennis. Less than three months later, the table tennis coach said to him, "You are too lazy to play table tennis without professionalism."

Hearing this, the operator burst into tears. The table tennis coach felt sorry for him and said to him earnestly, "Forget it, let me show you the way. You'd better play football."

10, football winning conditions: the turf is neither soft nor hard, the weather is neither cold nor hot, the light is not strong nor dark, the atmosphere of the fans is warm, the draw is good, the referee helps, and the goalpost saves the danger. Of course, the most important condition is that the opponent has no goalkeeper.

1 1, the unsolved mystery of the world

It is suggested that the football phenomenon in China should be included in the "unsolved mystery of the world".

Because: a country with a population of more than one billion can't find 1 1 people who can play football!

This fact is really puzzling.

12, football commentator-what deeply stung people in this warm-up match was that the head coach completely lost control of the team, the players' performance on the court collapsed inexplicably, and the process and result of the game broke through people's psychological bottom line again and again. No one can escape such a fiasco!