Who can tell me some jokes?

1. One day, Zhan Zhao asked Bao Zheng: Bao Gong, how did you get the moon above your head? Bao Zheng replied: Health. Zhan Zhao asked again: Can you take it off? Bao Zheng replied: No, and Zhan Zhao asked: What will happen if you take it off? Bao Zheng said: Take it off, ~~ ~ Then it's time to witness the miracle! ! !

2. How much is a kilo?

Everyone has gone to study agriculture, and the school stipulates that they should cook by themselves. We are all very excited. When we arrived in the field, we were ready to work, only to see a rural aunt carrying a dish from a distance. Several burly male students saw it and ran forward and asked, "How much is a catty?" Aunt took a look and replied: "No money, this is for pigs! ! "

3 the difference between initials and finals!

Classmate A: "What is an initial?"

Classmate B: "Idiot! Biological mother is your mother. "

Classmate A: "What is a vowel?"

Classmate B: "Asshole! "Pregnant mother" means that your mother is pregnant. "

four

Last English class.

I'm half asleep.

The teacher asked me:

"Are tomatoes fruits or vegetables?"

Oh, how should I know? I have to guess one.

"Well, fruit ..."

The teacher's voice is eight octaves high.

"What?"

Thanks to my cleverness, I quickly have my cake and eat it.

"It's vegetables, vegetables!"

The teacher finally unbearable:

"I asked you to translate this sentence!"