Joke Collection Website - Joke collection - Recommend some good classic comic dialogues.
Recommend some good classic comic dialogues.
Ma: Well, now advocate being polite.
Tang: being polite reflects a person's accomplishment and a nation's civilization.
Mr. Ma: You should use your honorific title for people.
don: mm-hmm.
ma: speak politely.
Tang: Only in this way can it be commensurate with our civilized country.
m: for example, I saw you.
don: you saw me.
m: I have to talk to you like this.
don: what do you mean?
ma: hey, comrade, excuse me, let me ask you something.
don: look how polite this is. If you have anything to do, just do it.
m: let me ask you a question.
don: who are you going to ask?
ma: I asked this comrade.
don: mm-hmm.
Ma: He is tall and burly with heavy eyebrows.
don: oh.
ma: I heard that he is a crosstalk performer.
don: oh, what's the name of this person you mentioned?
M: His name is Comrade Tang Jiezhong. Is it in your company?
don: oh, now, now.
ma: ah!
don: yes, yes, yes.
ma: please come out and I'll meet him. Thank you.
don't thank me, I am.
Ma: Oh, you are Comrade Tang Jiezhong.
don: hey.
m: oh, I'm so sorry.
don: hmm?
ma: I haven't seen you for so long. Sorry!
don: what's the big deal?
ma: do you hear this in your heart?
don: it sounds comfortable to me. How modest and polite.
ma: look, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, thank you, please.
don: kind words.
ma: that's not polite.
don: hmm?
ma: this shows respect for each other.
don: oh.
ma: I am modest and polite.
don: yes.
ma: hey, everyone has to talk like this.
don: oh oh.
ma: you have to change the way, without these polite words. You don't feel good when you listen to this.
don: how do you say that?
ma: that's right.
don: mm-hmm.
ma: hey! I said.
don: what's your name?
m: let me ask you about someone.
don: who are you going to ask?
ma: this man.
don: mm-hmm.
Ma: He is a little taller than Wu Dalang, with a head and a tea tray. Yes, I heard that he is a crosstalk performer. What's your name? Everyone's name is Tang Lan.
don: hey, why do you call it a nickname?
ma: huh?
Tang: This is me. What can I do for you?
ma: you are!
don: mm-hmm.
ma: don't be ridiculous.
don: what do you mean, don't be ridiculous. This is Tang Jiezhong speaking. What can I do for you?
ma: I have something to do. can I ask you to come if I have nothing to do?
don: just say something.
ma: come on, stop it, neither side is willing. What are you talking about?
don: why are you here?
ma: I said you, don't stare, don't stare. A stare is uglier than a epiphysis.
don: drink!
ma: look, why are you looking like this? no, it's not like this. Come on, come on, why are you doing this? Look, when you get angry, you get sick, and when you get sick, you catch a cold. Please, if you don't want to tell me, I'll ask someone else. Don't introduce yourself, silly gentlemen.
(Crosstalk)
Be polite
A: People should be polite.
b: being polite is very important.
a: politeness is "a fire in winter", an emotional "adhesive", a "key" to open the door of friendship, and a "warm hand" to people in trouble.
b: it seems that you really need to be polite.
a: for example, when we meet for the first time in the morning, we usually say "good morning"! Don't underestimate this sentence: "good morning", it makes people feel psychologically warm.
b: that's true.
a: actually, it doesn't matter whether we say hello to each other or not. No one should belong to anyone or owe anyone. However, without this sentence: "Good morning"! You will feel uncomfortable and uncomfortable, believe it?
b: is it that mysterious?
a: if you don't believe me, let's try it in front of so many audiences and see what your reaction is. Let's start now.
b: how to try it?
a: it's very simple. it's the first time that you and I met in the morning. you came from there and I came from here. we used to be old acquaintances, but after meeting, you look at you and I look at you, and no one talks.
b: it's too easy.
a: come on, let's go.
(Action: Two people walk opposite each other and give each other a lot)
A: How about that? How do you feel?
b: before you say it, it's really awkward.
a: do you feel bad?
b: of course. How do you feel?
a: do you know how I felt when I saw you like that?
b: how should I know how you feel!
a: I think you are sick. You are not very ill.
b: you're the one who's sick. say something bad, say something sick, really.
a: actually, this politeness is very important. it is not only a question of greeting each other, but also shows a person's accomplishment.
b: is it that serious?
a: of course. If people want to be respected by others, they should first respect others.
b: that's right. a person who doesn't respect others can't be respected by others.
a: it is not enough for a person to be polite, but also to know the minimum etiquette. It's important to be polite to people, but etiquette that you don't know won't do.
b: there must be etiquette?
a: the CCTV education channel, Social Etiquette taught by Professor Jin Zhengkun, is very good. I wonder if you have seen it? If you haven't seen it, I suggest you have a look, which is very beneficial.
b: you really need to learn more manners.
a: this etiquette is not immutable either. it also changes with the change of society and different national habits.
b: it seems that there are still so many questions about this etiquette.
a: yes, let's take our country as an example. It is a multi-ethnic country with great regional differences, so the manners are different. If the world is big, the manners are even more different. There is also a saying among our people: ten miles are different from customs.
b: after hearing what you said, you are really learned. can you show me something?
a: I feel quite comfortable after hearing your compliment. why not show my hands? I'll give them to you today and show them three or four hands in front of everyone at the same time. what do you think?
b: he's really out of breath when he says he's fat. ok, just show me four or five hands.
a: no problem. First of all, let's meet and say hello. Do you think this grade is ok?
b: ok, anywhere will do.
a: but sometimes you have to cooperate.
b: no problem. whatever you want, just five times and six times will do. please take care of yourself.
a: with such a good supporting role, I have to give it a good performance.
b: who's your supporting role? flatter yourself.
a: let's stop it and start now. Let's say that the etiquette of this meeting is different in different countries and regions, different nationalities and different genders.
b: what is it like for us in China to meet and greet each other?
a: are you asking about ancient times or modern times?
b: just ask ancient times.
a: do you mean greeting between men or women?
b: ask how to greet men first.
a: it's very simple. if two people are friends or peers, they just throw their fists at each other and greet each other. If there are different generations, the next generation should bow to the elders with fists and then greet them. If you say hello to your parents or older elders, sometimes you will kneel and knock. If you give it to the emperor, it will be more exquisite, and you should give it a gift. Would you?
b: I've seen it on TV and movies, but I know a little. I'm sorry.
a: can you also perform the "ceremony of the monarch and the minister"? Then why don't you give me a gift, let everyone judge and give you a score to see if you are qualified?
b: you can play.
a: it doesn't matter whether you salute or not. don't get angry. I am' fighting you to play'.
b: what should I do if women greet each other?
a: it's also very simple, that is, to say "hail" to each other. That's it (doing action).
b: this is ancient, so you should also learn from modern and modern people.
a: why can't you speak? what do you mean by "learning"? to be exact, it means "teaching".
b: teach? Who do you teach?
a: you, "a threesome must have a teacher". "The knower is the teacher". You forgot everything.
b: well, even if you are a teacher, in that case, I have to have a good consultation today (to himself).
a: go ahead, disciple, there is nothing left for a teacher. They are all unreserved and selfless.
b: teacher, how do modern people greet modern people when they meet?
a: how can you be so stupid as a student? you can't even meet and say hello. it's really rude.
b: teacher, you have a lot of manners. please teach me.
a: well, modern etiquette has also been reformed, and with the improvement of living standards, etiquette has also changed constantly. Bowing changed to shaking hands. Especially lesbians, when they meet and say hello, they don't say "hail" anymore. Young people don't have to kneel and kowtow when they meet their elders. Think about it. Now people pay attention to hygiene, like you. If I climb to the ground and kowtow when I meet Master, I'm sorry, and it's unsanitary, don't you think?
b: who kowtowed to you and knelt down?
a: not only this etiquette has changed, but also the language of this greeting has changed. Especially in recent years, the living standard has improved, and people have paid attention to manners. This etiquette has also become a compulsory "lesson" for modern people. When they go out, they have more dealings with others and have more entertainment, and they have also learned a lot about this etiquette.
b: that's true.
a: the language of this greeting has also changed a lot.
b: what did you say when you met in the sixties and seventies?
a: at that time, the problem of food and clothing was not solved. Generally, when people meet, they always ask "Have you eaten" first? Short for "Did you eat?"
b: why do you ask? can't you ask something else?
a: everyone did. at that time, eating was the first problem, and everyone regarded eating as the most commendable thing. Some places are even more interesting. No matter all the year round, everyone is outside the door when eating. Men, women and children are holding bowls outside, regardless of what "good things" are in the bowls, so that others can see them. At least it shows that my family has food today. This is not just for eating, but also for showing off.
b: how unsanitary! Then how to answer.
a: generally, the answer is "yes". whether you are hungry or not, whether you have eaten or not, you should answer first. Then ask, "Did you eat?" If the answer is "no", it probably means that you don't have rice in the pot, and maybe you can't even marry a daughter-in-law.
b: it seems that this greeting still bears the brand of the times.
a: that's it, "did you eat"? There are still many jokes.
b: really? tell me about it.
a: once, I just came out of the toilet, and a colleague happened to come by. He also went to the toilet, and he first asked, "Have you eaten?"
b: what's your answer?
a: of course I answered "yes", so I asked him "did you eat?"
b: what did he say?
a: "not yet. I'll eat later.".
b: how embarrassing it is, there is no other topic.
a: it was like this at that time, and elderly comrades may still remember it.
b: teacher, what are the gifts for foreigners when they meet? Please advise.
a: if you want to talk about foreign countries, there are too many foreign countries. I won't tell you about them one by one today. I'll just choose a few typical ones, such as Europe and Africa, to teach you the tuition fee. You don't have to pay it today. It's free, but it won't happen again.
b: nice try. whoever has money will ask you for advice.
a: for example, in Europe, men usually hug or shake hands when they meet.
b: when they meet, they also ask, "have you eaten?" This sentence?
a: people don't ask like tHIs. They usually greet each other with hi or Hello. When they meet, they usually talk about the weather. If you see an old man, China people are out of respect for the old man. Generally, it is good to ask, "Is your old man old this year?"
b: that's age.
a: the old man in China will be happy to tell you his or her age. But it is impolite abroad, especially for older lesbians. It is impolite and she will be very angry. Like what: where did you get rich? What is the salary? Can't even ask.
b: so how do you ask?
a: she will be very happy if you praise her.
b: how? For example, I met an elderly lesbian.
a: generally speaking, foreigners don't call themselves "comrades" but "ladies".
b: I'm used to saying that.
a: you say, "you look so young, you are so beautiful". She would say "thank you!"
b: that will certainly work in China.
a: you are wrong. for example, if you meet a beautiful lesbian on the road, you want to talk to her and say, "you are so beautiful".
b: she will be very happy.
a: she will call you a "rogue".
b: how to curse.
a: you are said to be a hooligan who thinks highly of you. if this lesbian gets angry and turns you to the police station, you'll have to struggle if you can't eat. if you meet her boyfriend or husband, you'll be even more unlucky.
b: it seems that the customs and habits in different places are quite different.
a: of course, when we meet, most of us smile and greet each other warmly, but there is a tribe in Africa. When we meet for the first time, we welcome you and cry first.
b: it's not awkward.
a: you have to cry a few words in order to express your happiness in welcoming your host. If you can't cry, you don't really mean it.
b: the customs are so different.
a: I know. Most friends or colleagues meet by shaking hands or hugging. Do you know when you go to France?
b: everyone in France doesn't know.
a: if you meet your friend's wife or young lady in France, do you know what to do?
b: Of course, it's a hug. Who doesn't want a hug? Don't you think so, comrades.
a: wrong. You have to kiss your hand.
b: a hand kiss? Is to use my nose to smell the hands of a wife or a lady?
a: no, it means kissing with your mouth-kissing means kissing, that is, kissing each other's hand with your mouth to show respect for each other.
b: well, I won't do it. Kiss her hand with my mouth. If she just finished wearing makeup, she can barely do it. If she just came out of the toilet, how can I?
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