A joke about staying in the sea

1, look at the middle of the nose, look at the face with neat bangs, look at the temperament with oblique bangs, and look at the five senses without bangs. . . I am suitable for facial mask!

2. Is there a feeling that the happiest students always sit in the last row in class? . .

Alcoholics applied for a job in a wine company and tasted more than a dozen wines. The drunkards all told the year and degree of the wine, and the examiners were shocked. The manager winked at the female secretary, who handed her a cup of urine. After drinking, the drunkard said: female, 23 years old, pregnant for 2 months! Suddenly the whole audience was silent. The drunkard thought that the application failed and said angrily, if you don't give me this job, I will tell the father of the child! Several leaders present said with one voice: "You got in!"

4, the same as a B, NB to the north, SB to the south, the most important thing in life is direction. . .

5. The most difficult thing this summer is boys. Walking in the stairwell and looking up and down is also hooliganism ... Walking on the road, a gust of wind blows.

6. "What's your father's name?" "Jiang" "What's your father's name?" Head-up is a rogue.

7. Whenever the exam comes, I always think of the classic dialogue between Zhang Wuji and Zhang Sanfeng: "Promise, how much do you remember what I taught you?" "Master Huitai, I only remember more than half." "Well, what about now?" "There is less than half left." "Well, what about now?" "I forgot everything!" "Well, you can go ..."

8. Yu Shu waited for Meng for one or two thousand years, and was dumped after two minutes of intimacy ... White Niangzi waited for Xu Xian for two thousand years, was taken in by the French sea, and Xu Xian became a monk ... the Monkey King waited for Tang Priest for five hundred years, ate a banana and was put on a golden hoop ... Wang Baochuan waited for Xue Pinggui 18 years, but even though he came back with his mistress, he still suspected Wang Baochuan was cheating others ...

One day, the devil took the princess away, and she kept screaming.

Demon: [screaming at your throat] ... no one will come to save you ...]

Princess: [broken throat] ... broken throat ...]

No one: "Princess ... I'm coming to save you ..."

Devil: "Speak of the devil and he will come ..."

Cao Cao: "Devil .. Why did you call me ..."

Demon: "Wow ... seeing a ghost"

Ghost: "Shit! Was discovered .. "

Shit: "Ghost, can you see me ..."

Devil: "Oh, my God! 」

God: "Who called me? 」

Who: "Nobody called you ..."

Nobody said, "Where am I? Play dumb! 」

Garlic: "Who is pretending to be me? 」

Who: "It's me again? Are you looking for trouble? 」

Trouble: "which one is looking for me?" 」

Which one: "Looking for you? I didn't ... hey, there are so many people here. "

Many people: "I just arrived. Who are you? 」

Which one: "I'm not who."

Who: "He's not me."

Princess: "Is everyone here to save me? 」

Everyone said, "I'm not here to save you, I'm here to watch the fun."

Lively: "What do I have to see? 」

God: "It's none of my business. Let's go first. "

Devil: "You answer a question before you go. Why do so many people save the princess? " ? How can I play this demon king? 」

Go down: "You good devil won't do it, what shall I do?" 」

Princess: "If no one hits the devil, I can go."

No one: "If I play the devil, how can I let you go ..."

How come: "I won't let the princess go, I want to watch the excitement."

Lively: "What are you looking at me for? 」

What: "You want to fuck me? Rogue! 」

How dare you: "I didn't? 」

Me: "What does it have to do with me?" 」

Devil: "Shit! I'm going crazy ... "

Shit: "What am I doing? ...」

Madman: "What do you want me to do? 」

You want me to say, "I don't know anything! 」

I don't know anything: "I don't know! 」

I don't know: "I'm here! Is someone calling me? 」

Someone said, "I didn't call you! 」

I didn't say, "Who called him? 」

Who: "Wrong ... I didn't ..."

I didn't say, "I haven't wronged you ..."

You: "I dare you."

I dare you: "Who says I dare not! ? 」

Who: "please ... I didn't say anything."

I have nothing: "What do you want me to say? 」

I am nothing: "... you ... aren't you my long-lost brother?" ”」

My long-lost brother: "Kao ... my name is very long ... I will be called ..."

Who: "... I want to leave this troublesome place. "

True or false: "So this is my place ..."

I am nothing &; No: "Stop arguing, we are talking ..."

Don't bother us: "I won't talk ..."

I didn't: "I didn't speak! ...」

I have nothing to say: "-_-\ \ \" ... Let's go out and talk ... "

Go: "I'm sorry ... (wriggle)"

I have nothing: "It's none of your business ... Go away ..." (Two brothers go out angrily)

It's none of your business: "Whoops ... why did you kick me out ..."

Why: "I don't want to kick you out ... listen ... don't cry."

I didn't say, "Oh ... What does it have to do with me?"

None of my business: "What? Did anyone call me? 」

Someone said, "Who wants to call you ..."

Who: "I really have to go ... T.T." "

Go: "I'm really embarrassed ... *V.V*"

None of your business: "... aren't you my cousin?" ”」

It's none of my business: "... cousins of the same age (or cousins) ... long time no see ..."

For a long time: "I'm not here ..."

Devil: "Are you finished? 」

Endless: "He doesn't have me."

You: "I don't have him."

I just said, "Who said that? 」

Who: "What do you want me to do? 」

Do you want to fuck me? 」

You: "I won't fuck him."

I said, "Who said I wouldn't? 」

Who: "Wrong! I didn't say. "

He said, "What should I do? 」

? "You two are shameless! 」

You two: "I want it! I want it! 」

Face: "Who wants me? 」

Who: "I don't want it."

Devil: "Hurry up, or I'll kick people out."

Man: "Kick me out? Looking for k "

K: "Who wants to see me? 」

Who: "aaaaaaa! Don't mention my name, mention me again! 」

He said, "Don't trust me."

Me: "Who wants me? 」

Who: "I finally caught one and killed it ..."

One: "Don't arrest me."

Me: "I've had enough, too. If anyone mentions my name again, I will never let you go! 」

Who said, "Look at my eighteen dragon palms! 」

Me: "Look at my nine yin bones and claws! 」

Eighteen palms of dragon descending: "What am I to see? 」

Jiuyin Bones Claw: "What am I to see? 」

What's there to see: "Brother, I finally found you! 」

What's there to see? "Brother, let's talk outside."

Devil: "Shit ... this is an engagement meeting ..."

It is said that the lich king has suffered from schizophrenia since then.

Do you think this is the end of the joke? In fact, this shows that people are lazy, and this has an ending! Now I'll tell you the ending, don't be moved to tears!

Ending:

It is said that after the devil's schizophrenia was cured, he caught the princess again.

This time, the lich king decided to cut to the chase, to make a long story short, in order to avoid others running out to spoil the game again, and cut to the chase directly. .....

Devil: "Stop struggling! Listen to me and marry me! 」

Princess: "All right! 」

So "I" happily took the princess's hand and walked into the wedding hall, accepting all the blessings, leaving only the demon king with his mouth open like a hippo and his body stupefied. ......