Compliments depend on the occasion.

Whether in the workplace or in life, it is inevitable to say some compliments, but it depends on the occasion. In the face of familiar friends, flattery will only make friends farther and farther away from you. Be realistic and not divorced from reality. Appropriate praise will make people feel comfortable. The following is my collection of compliments to everyone, depending on the occasion. Welcome to learn from it.

First of all, how to speak kindly?

If you go to a friend's house, your friend is extremely polite to you. Every time you say a word, he just? Wei Wei? On the other hand, when talking to you, he is always polite, for fear that you will be unhappy or offend you. In this case, you must feel like a thorn in your back, fidgeting until you leave his house. You may have encountered a lot of this situation, but you must think about it. Do you treat visitors like this? Although it is polite, it is obviously unbearable. Do as you would be done by. Please remember this famous saying.

It's nothing to say a few kind words to a guest for the first time, but it's not appropriate to keep talking. The purpose of the conversation is to communicate the feelings of both sides and deepen understanding, while the pleasantries are only obstacles between the two sides. If this wall is not demolished, people can only make some simple perfunctory answers through the wall.

Probably friends will be very polite the first time, but they will be hurt a lot when they meet for the second time and the third time. Those? Your Excellency? 、? Your family? Nouns such as "equal". Has been used, sincere friendship can not be established.

Polite words show your respect and gratitude, not perfunctory friends, so enough is enough. If you use it too much, it will become pedantic, slick and hypocritical. Someone did a little thing for you, such as pouring a cup of tea, don't you think? Thank you? That's enough. If under special circumstances; At most? Excuse me, should I bother you with this? That's enough, but some people want to say: Oh, thank you. I'm really sorry. I shouldn't bother you about such a trifle. I'm really sorry. I really appreciate it． You look uncomfortable: I wonder if you have such a problem?

Speak kindly and sincerely. Courtesy words like recited Tang poems are the most annoying. When you speak, you should be more enthusiastic and difficult, and you should not appear anxious or nervous. In addition, it is not elegant to keep your body balanced when you speak politely, bow and scrape excessively and shake your head.

If you change your usual polite language to be honest with your friends, you will certainly get more friendship. Be polite to people you have never been polite at ordinary times, such as domestic servants, your children, shop assistants, taxi drivers, etc. You are bound to receive unexpected benefits. Avoid being too polite. In a friend's house, if you look casual and natural, the host will not be too polite. And when you are a master, you can also use this method.

Most of the pleasantries in the interview are unpleasant. Now let's discuss what we should pay attention to in polite work.

Lack of sincere and rigid polite words will never arouse the listeners' favor. ? I've heard a lot about you, do you know? 、? Your business must be booming, right? 、? I'm just a little learned, please advise me! ! ? These unemotional and completely formulaic compliments must be corrected from the perspective of conversation art.

Speak truthfully, not empty, which is one of the conditions of speaking. Instead of saying, I've heard a lot about you, you know? , but:? The last winter disaster relief charity sale you hosted was really a surprise, wasn't it? If so, directly mention his famous social activities. Shang Ruo praised others for their prosperous business, so he praised his ability to sell products or his better business policy. Please hire someone? Teach everything? It's impossible. You should choose your own advantages and focus on one or two questions to ask him. Must be much happier.

Praise or compliment must be practical. Instead of grabbing soup from other people's homes, it is better to praise the ingenious layout of the room, or admire a good painting on the wall, or marvel at the exquisiteness of a bonsai. If the owner loves dogs, you should praise a dog he keeps; For example, the owner keeps a lot of goldfish. You should appreciate those goldfish.

It is much better to praise other people's work achievements, favorite pets and the most careful design than to say many meaningless and vague polite words. One thing that pays special attention to others can make people feel grateful in addition to joy. Scholars are used as confidants, and women are pleasing to themselves. After Zhong Ziqi's death, Boya stopped playing the piano all his life. What made him so grateful to his bosom friend was that he caught his heart and praised him. Therefore, it is not surprising that people who are good at talking will often get help in the future because of a proper compliment.

Unpleasant kind words

It is meaningful to admire others from the heart. If you don't carefully study and analyze each other, you can't blindly compliment. Unrealistic compliments are annoying.

For a person with status and fame, the words of praise should be carefully scrutinized. First of all, I think a person can become a celebrity because he has made a special contribution to a certain job, and when he is famous, there must be many people complimenting him. If you are bored for a long time, you can still flatter him with what others used later, and it won't make him happy, because he has heard too much.

Generally, famous people are used to their jobs. If you can't be original, you can't touch his heart. For this kind of person, it is best to find something to praise him outside of work. For example, a banking tycoon likes to write poems in his spare time, so if you praise his contribution in the financial field, it is better to say that his poems are well written, because his well-known works do not need compliments, and his floating pen is very good but no one pays attention to it. If you are different, you will win his favor. So you should remember that when you praise an ordinary person, you can praise the parts of his works that no one pays attention to, especially the works and techniques that he is proud of. But for a celebrity, you should appreciate his little-known things that he thinks he is proud of.

Be careful what you say, especially compliments. Don't think that since it is a compliment, you won't offend others, so just talk nonsense. False expectations are easy to make mistakes. When you see a woman, you can't praise her for being beautiful. If she knows that she is really not beautiful, she will think you are slippery. In this case, you might as well praise her liveliness, or say that she is young, or that she is well-proportioned, or praise her cleverness, cleverness and humor, or praise her for keeping the house in order and educating children. Wait a minute. Women, too, have their own strengths. Although it is a compliment, we should choose it. Therefore, don't say compliments blatantly. Second, don't use the same expression frequently. Third, don't say more. It is equally offensive to say too many compliments.

Appropriate praise

Everyone likes to hear compliments. If you praise someone properly, he will be very happy and have a good impression on you. The more arrogant people are, the more they like to hear compliments from others, and the more they like to be complimented by others. Some people are serious. He said that he didn't accept praise and was willing to accept criticism. This is his facade. If you believe it and criticize him rudely and bluntly, he will be very unhappy. On the surface, he may not show it, but he hates you at heart. His impression of you will only decrease and never improve.

? Lucky people are happy when they have it? This is the only way to be generous. Generally, people who pretend to be children cannot tolerate criticism from others, let alone ordinary people. Being good at flattery makes others feel comfortable, and you don't belittle yourself. It is an important knowledge to say that flattery is an important part of life.

Everyone has hope, young people hope to pin their hopes on themselves, and old people hope to pin their hopes on their children and grandchildren. The young man thinks he has a bright future. If you cite some points to show that he will make great achievements in the future, he will be very happy and regard you as his confidant. If you praise his parents for asking questions, he may not be happy. If you say that he is a son, praise him with his parents, which is exactly what he wants.

Not only the old man, but also after many vicissitudes, he has not achieved his expected goal for decades, and he has no confidence and hope in himself. What he wants is his children and grandchildren. If you say that his son is better than him in knowledge, ability and sports. Although you are Yoko's father, he won't blame you, but will appreciate you. He will repeatedly say: you are right, not necessarily, not necessarily, I'm flattered? But in his heart, he thinks you are a hero! This is the key to pay special attention to the other person's age when saying compliments.

For a businessman, if you say that he is knowledgeable, noble, upright, happy and poor, he must be indifferent. You have to say that he is talented and flexible, and now his face is red, which will make him happy.

For an official, if you say that he has a good way to make money, he will definitely make a fortune, and he will be unhappy. You should say that he is honest, honest and self-righteous, which will make you happy.

For a scholar, if you say that he has a solid foundation in learning, he is well-versed, has a correct mind and speaks calmly, he will be happy. What kind of compliment do you say according to the other person's occupation? This is the secret of flattery.

Some people are often direct when praising others? Like what? In the past, a friend's specialty was to praise the second place in front of a third party, which was often much better than direct praise. Another method can be called indirect praise. For example, if you meet someone, you say to him: I talked to a B the other day about your brother, and he spoke highly of you. . Regardless of whether a B really praised an A for you, an A won't go anyway. Is the investigation true? Yes

Bernard Shaw once said: What people want to know most often has nothing to do with themselves? , this sentence is just and China people say? It's none of your business, okay? On the contrary, but Bernard Shaw's meal is undoubtedly true. So, ordinary people often suffer some? Legend? (even if it is not necessarily reliable) to influence your perception, so when you tell someone that someone praised him, he is not thanking someone, but thanking you! If you happen to be someone A has always admired, then A will be more grateful to you.

Dr Bevel, an Austrian psychologist, once said: If you want to praise a person, but you can't find anything worthy of praise, then you can praise his relatives or something related to him. ? Because we humans all know how to use our brains to think about things other than ourselves, such as family or our own affairs.

By analogy, you can praise your friend's son for his hard work, his greatness, beauty and wisdom, and his room with style-if all this is true.

Finally, tell a joke, which may enlighten you.

A man is an expert in flattery, even the prince knows his name. After his death, he went to see the prince, who was furious. Why flatter yourself? I hate such people the most! ? The flatterer kowtowed and replied:? Because the world loves flattery, it has to be so. The king is fair, honest and observant. Who dares to say a compliment? ? Yan listened and repeatedly said yes! I dare you. In fact, Yan also likes to listen to praise, but the way of praise is different from the general one.